What we need to understand before having children

Raise children full of surprises. No matter how many books or children's forums you read, how many instructional videos watched - nothing will prepare you for 100% for a baby in the family. But there are 10 basic things you should know before you become new parents.

1. Just give birth - at first glance

Some breed like rabbits. In others it does not work. Many people naively believe that is wanted to have a baby, stop using contraception, and bam! This will happen. In fact - not faaakt. Because our body is designed not just. If you are thinking replenishment of the family and want to plan a pregnancy for a specified period, select yourself plenty of time and try not to worry over the whole period.

2. The first months - a real torture

Perhaps babies cries are annoying, they sleep less sensitive, and breastfeeding is painful - only in order to strengthen the spirit of their parents. Because, if you survive the first few months of this crazy camp for children, not having lost at the same time mind you - heroes - to cope with all that you want.

This time - a living hell for those who like to sleep, shower and comfort. To explain how hard it is useless. It is impossible to describe what it is - to wake up for a few months every two hours at night. Or try to soothe a crying baby is inconsolable. Or feel in the body for 3 sizes more usual (by the way, the future Pope get fat together with future mothers). Or feel out of place for a few months or maybe even years.

In all this chaos has its advantages. In particular, no matter how bad it may, you will overcome all the difficulties. Just do not be afraid to ask for help, especially if you suffer from postpartum depression.

The first months after the birth of a child - it is not only the suffering and chaos. It is also amazing, full of bliss and moments of tenderness. After some time, you may even begin to feel sad for this pleasant period of life, and (oh crazy! :) want to experience this torture again.

3. Forget the dream. You will be missed

Whether it's a baby in your arms or kid growing up, you will experience problems with sleep. The nightmares, the child sleeps between you. And how difficult it is to raise children in time to the school... Oh, and the like.

Keep track of habits! If you are not willing to tolerate them up to university level, do not plant them - for example, let the child in his bed in the middle of the night.

4. Children utensils and things: they do not need a lot

Strollers, car seats, playpens, swings, inflatable mattresses, game pads, teething rings, bibs... It seems that children need a ton of equipment. Dear layfhakery, let me save you money! You not necessary and half of these things.

Many new parents somehow believe that their child will certainly be boring, or he needs constant stimulation of the brain. In fact, most of the time the baby is asleep; when waking up, screaming to be fed, and then goes back to sleep after feeding. You do not need a lot of additional ways to take it. For a young child everything of interest.

As a rule, children tend to cease to be interested in the toys before you have time to get them. Is not it easier to buy a wooden cubes or make your own hands trinkets improvised?

Similarly, there is no reason to buy as much of children's clothes, at least new. On the one hand, the relatives and friends love to give charming outfits (who can resist from buying tiny bootees and bonnets ?!). On the other - the children grow by leaps and bounds. Some of the things they do not really have time to denounce before they become them small. Try to purchase a wardrobe items that wear out most quickly, on sale or second-hand. The more your kids get dirty, the more you have to buy new stuff. But until you see the need to purchase new clothes, go around the departments of children's party ware.

5. Children = a lot of unexpected expenses

Diapers - what you will constantly need in the first years of life. Mountain diapers. This, of course, it is no secret. But, most likely, you greatly underestimate how much in the end you will have to buy them. So coupons, discounts, promotions on diapers will no longer seem so ridiculous and very useful to you.

Other unplanned expenses can come out of nowhere. For example, music lessons, babysitting, holiday trips with the class, even the cost of treatment may be surprised. But perhaps the biggest sucker of money is kindergarten. He, of course, allows you to work at his job, but its content is sometimes so great, even to get a second job!

Total: spend less money on clothes that still wears out quickly, and keep in mind the unexpected (or unexpectedly high) expenses for the child, you may fly into a lot of money.

6. With a child, you can work from home (at certain times)

There are two periods when working from home with the children more or less comfortable. Before they started to walk (when a child learns to hold himself, mainly due to the fine motor skills of hands), and when it is old enough, and understands that during work from home you can not be available. If your child is not too difficult to entertain yourself, then work from home easily. But there is a slight feeling of guilt that you can not pay attention to it constantly.

It is difficult to talk to the child, "No. I am busy (s). "Several times a day. Therefore, even if you are lucky enough to work from home, you need to plan for the care of children as long as they do not grow and will not cease to demand your full attention.

7. Do not panic when your child reaches the common stages of development

In the books they write that all the children to one year should start walking, and if this does not happen, you need to see a doctor. In practice, some babies take their first steps until the age of 16-17 months. And that's fine. If your child is a year, and he still can not walk, you are naturally worried. Some children wear diapers longer than others. Rough advice from strangers, saying that it's time to have your child on the potty and walk on her own, even more to drive you into a panic.

Remember: each baby develops under its domestic schedule. It is possible that your baby does not begin to go because it uses energy to another - learning to speak, for example. Do not rush your child, causing him to speak, walk, run, read. Children grow so quickly. Teach your child everything in one day is impossible. Better to wait until he or she will be ready for it.

8. You will not regret that you make too many children's photos and videos

In the early years, you most likely will do a photo and video with your baby all the time. Unfortunately, when the children grow up, we start to capture less pleasant moments of their lives. You will never regret that made too many photos or videos of your growing child. Moreover, you will always feel like you're missing something.

9. Out of the house somewhere - every time an adventure

When you become a parent, there is a temporary shift. What was once lasted 5 minutes (for example, so you would need to run to the nearest shop) now takes a much longer time. There are additional minute on what to pack, freight, packaged drinks, food and diapers to install a child seat in the car and do a lot of other things.

Eating out will be for you a completely new experience. Food, falling to the floor, rolling down to the pencils of the table, staring coldly into your visitors and waiters... Even if you manage arrange with your other half something like Goodbye, all you have time, most likely, will speak about the child or to worry about him.

10. You'll never be the same

Parenthood change you. It's predictable. But you can not even imagine how much it will change you and your view of the world. In one night, you do not turn into just like your parents, my mom and dad. But your values, outlook and habits are reorganized in accordance with one being - your child.

► Your habits will change for the better. You will begin to think more about healthy and nutritious food intake, be careful driving a car, wiser to spend money, ethical behavior, think more often about the duration of his life (and how it increase).

► Is your relationship with your partner will change. Until this happens, you do not know - for better or for worse. But parenting is making adjustments in both, even in the way you look for a partner.

► You may have to say goodbye with the usual entertainment. TV or TV show, play games, protorchat noon on the internet now you are unlikely to succeed.

► From now on free time, left to itself, will not.

► You'll have to be more cheerful and creative. Your to-do list will be tasks such as: make the costume rabbit, draw a horse, to cook something different from the oatmeal or pea.

► You will experience a strong feeling of affection and love, which even previously could not imagine.

None of these facts, however horrible it may seem, will not disturb you in the long run. You learn about yourself as a parent, a lot of new - something that can make you stronger, but at the same time more vulnerable.

Making the decision to have a child is crucial. It's the same thing that let the heart outside his body. I think many parents would agree that this is so. But it's worth it! Yet think about it beforeThan to have children.