13 Terrible Russian Title Translations That Could Have Made You Miss Good Movies

1. Crazy holidays

spring breakers

• USA, France, 2012.
• Crime, drama.
• Duration: 94 minutes.
• IMDb: 5.3.

Four students dream of going to Miami. To get money for the trip, the girls rob a restaurant, but they are not going to stop there. Soon they have a friend - a white rapper Elien, part-time drug dealer and weapons.

The Russian title "Spring Breakers" is misleading: you might think that this is a youth comedy about girls in bikinis. But in fact, the audience is waiting for a provocative arthouse from one of the most radical American directors - Harmony Korine. The original title implies a play on words: spring break ("spring break") it is combined with breakers ("violators").

And this is the case when the film is really worth watching, despite the strange title and low ratings on aggregators. Behind the almost absent plot and vivid shots of half-naked girls lies a satire on the mores of modern teenagers who grew up on video games. No wonder the director took on the main roles of former Disney stars.

2. finished

Terminal

• Ireland, UK, Hong Kong, Hungary, USA, 2017.
• Thriller, drama, crime.
• Duration: 92 minutes.
• IMDb: 5.4.

Enigmatic blonde Annie works as a waitress during the day and dances a striptease in the evening. The girl has an evil mind: she is going to pit several killers against each other in order to then get their job.

The debut work of the director and screenwriter Von Stein was not liked by critics because of the vague plot, but you can watch it at least for the sake of the charisma of Margot Robbie and the neo-noir atmosphere. Yes, and it is simply obliged to be in this collection: after all, it is even difficult to imagine a more ridiculous translation.

The painting, originally called "Terminal", for some reason was renamed "Done". And at first the film seemed to be called "The Final", but then for some reason the letters were rearranged.

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3. My girl is a monster

Colossal

• Canada, USA, Spain, South Korea, 2016.
• Fantasy, thriller, comedy, thriller.
• Duration: 110 minutes.
• IMDb: 6.2.

After breaking up with her boyfriend, Gloria returns to the small town where she once grew up. There, the girl meets a former classmate and gets a job as a waitress in his bar. Life slowly begins to improve, but then it turns out that on the other side of the world, a giant monster has appeared out of nowhere, repeating all the movements of Gloria.

The Spaniard Nacho Vigalondo ("Open Windows") turned out an unusual picture. Under the cover of fantasy and wacky humor, the director hid a difficult story about loneliness, depression, difficult relationships with alcohol and violence against women.

But the Russian distributors killed the whole point of the film, calling it a comedy. And the original name, of course, would be more correct to translate as "Grand" or "Colossal".

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4. killer haircut

The Legend of Barney Thomson

• UK, Canada, 2015.
• Comedy, crime.
• Duration: 96 minutes.
• IMDb: 6.3.

Glasgow hairdresser Barney Thomson accidentally stabs his boss to death with scissors when he tries to fire him. To help the hero get rid of the body is taken by the mother. The problem is that the couple, unwittingly, furnishes their crime exactly like an unknown maniac-dismemberer terrorizing the city.

Actor Robert Carlisle's directorial debut fits in nicely with the black crime comedies like "Low Under in Bruges", "Seven Psychopaths" and "Once Upon a Time in Ireland". Everything would be fine, but the original title "The Legend of Barney Thomson" through the efforts of the distributor turned into something more suitable for an average action movie.

5. Tiptoe

The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things

• USA, UK, France, Japan, 2004.
• Drama.
• Duration: 98 minutes.
• IMDb: 6.4.

Prostitute Sarah takes her little son Jeremiah from foster parents, where he lived quite well. But the mother from Sarah is useless: she sneers at the child in every possible way, leaves him alone for a long time and breaks his psyche.

Considering the heavy topics covered in the Asia Argento film, the Russian title seems derisive. In the original, the headline contains a phrase from the Bible - "The heart of man is deceitful above all things." Obviously, the distributors felt that such an unusual headline would alienate viewers. But the picture itself is not particularly suitable for the general public.

6. Promise does not mean marriage

He's Just Not That Into You

• USA, Germany, 2008.
• Drama, melodrama, comedy.
• Duration: 129 minutes.
• IMDb: 6.4.

Several residents of Baltimore are trying to deal with problems in their personal lives. One gentleman never calls back after a date, the other is angry that the boyfriend is in no hurry to part with the status of a bachelor. Finally, the third lady suspects that her husband is secretly smoking, although in fact he is hiding something worse from his wife.

Although the Russian name promises viewers a typical rom-comthe movie is much more interesting. It is based on the Sex and the City book of the same name by two screenwriters. It reveals the hard truth about how to understand the intentions of men: according to the authors, if the guy himself does not take an active initiative when meeting, he is not interested in the girl.

In the original, both the book and the movie are titled "He Just Didn't Catch You." And this title perfectly conveys the meaning of the work. But for some reason, the translators replaced it with a stupid phrase that had nothing to do with the plot at all.

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7. vicious games

Stoker

• USA, UK, 2012.
• Thriller, drama, detective.
• Duration: 99 minutes.
• IMDb: 6.8.

On her eighteenth birthday, India Stoker is left without a father. Their difficult relationship with their mother becomes even more complicated after the family meets Charlie, the brother of the deceased, at the funeral. The man stays to stay with them and is extremely persistent in trying to make friends with India. Meanwhile, strange things begin to happen in the house.

The author of "Oldboy" Park Chang-wook has created many wonderful paintings on his homeland. When making his first English-language film, he was inspired by Hitchcock's Shadow of a Doubt. It was beautiful, dark and deep.

The only pity is that the Hollywood debut of an outstanding creator, originally called simply "Stokers", in Russia has acquired a very strange title - "Vicious Games". As a result, the dark thriller about dysfunctional family relationships could be mistaken for yet another clone of Basic Instinct.

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8. Last love on earth

perfect sense

• UK, Sweden, Denmark, Ireland, 2010.
• Fantasy, drama, melodrama.
• Duration: 88 minutes.
• IMDb: 7.1.

Cook Michael and epidemiologist Susan fall in love. Their romance develops against the backdrop of a strange epidemic. People in the literal sense of the word are alternately deprived of all their senses: first smell, then taste. Next in line is hearing and vision.

Looking at the Russian poster of the film, the viewer might think that he is waiting for a stereotypical love story. But in fact, this is a sensual and very unusually filmed drama with Eva Green and Ewan McGregor.

Moreover, the original title of the film - "The Perfect Feeling" - is much less pretentious. And even the poster in the original version looks much simpler.

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9. Macho and nerd

21 Jump Street

• USA, 2012.
• Action, comedy, crime.
• Duration: 109 minutes.
• IMDb: 7.2.

Classmates Morton and Greg didn't get along at school, but then met at the police academy and became best friends there. After graduation, the men get into the 21 Jump Street project, aimed at solving crimes among teenagers. The heroes are sent to a high school to pretend to be teenagers and find out who sells drugs to students.

The idea to combine a typical police detective and a youth comedy about a school came up with Jonah Hill, who himself played one of the main roles. The film was directed by the talented duo of directors Phil Lord and Christopher Miller.

In the original, the movie is called neutrally - "Jump Street, 21". But the Russian distribution title, most likely, will make many viewers pass by this film. And in vain - this is a wonderful tape that competently combines comedy with drama.

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10. Killer vacation

Tucker and Dale vs Evil

• Canada, 2010
• Horror, comedy.
• Duration: 85 minutes.
• IMDb: 7.5.

Simple village boys Dale and Tucker come to Tucker's purchased barn in the woods to have a good time in nature. And nearby, at the same time, a group of students are resting, who accidentally mistake a couple for maniacs.

Debutant Eli Craig's work pokes fun at the genre slashers - Youth horror movies like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Friday the 13th. As a rule, in such films, a terrible killer hunts for boys and girls, and in the end, not everyone manages to survive. But in Craig's version, the "maniacs" are actually the nicest people, and all murders are the fault of the victims themselves.

In the original, the picture is called "Tucker and Dale vs. the Forces of Evil", which is justified by the plot. Needless to say, the Russian rental title does not at all convey the mood and meaning of the film. In addition, the movie can easily be confused with Spring Breakers.

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11. Silver Linings Playbook

Silver Linings Playbook

• USA, 2012.
• Drama, melodrama, comedy.
• Duration: 120 minutes.
• IMDb: 7.7.

Teacher Pat Solitano finds his wife with her lover, beats him to a pulp and ends up in a hospital for the mentally ill. Returning after a course of treatment to his parents, he meets Tiffany, who recently became a widow. The girl persuades Pat to perform together in a dance competition. And such a turn does not fit into his plan to return to his wife.

A film by David O. Russell ("Fighter", "American Hustle") was released in Russian box office under the name "My boyfriend is a psycho", which does not correspond to the content as much as possible. Literally, the original title translates as "Collection of Rays of Hope." This is an untranslatable metaphor, meaning that even the worst situation can come out with a positive result.

By the way, the animated series HouseBroken was recently released on KinoPoisk. It is about a dog that arranges psychotherapy sessions for other pets. The original name is built on the word housebreaking (eng. “wean the animal to go to the toilet at home”). Blogger Alexander Kulikov suggestedAlexander Kulikov / Twitter its own version of the translation - "Psinotherapy".

As a result, PsinoTherapy was abandoned in favor of My Pet is Crazy. Sounds familiar, doesn't it? Apparently, this formula is used in all cases when you need to come up with a catchy headline, but all the good ideas are over.

12. Boyfriend from the future

about time

• UK, USA, 2013.
• Science fiction, fantasy, drama, melodrama, comedy.
• Duration: 123 minutes.
• IMDb: 7.8.

Shy boyfriend Tim Lake uses his family's ability to travel back in time to win over the girl he likes. But gradually he understands that it is necessary to live here and now.

Because of the Russian rental title, you might think that “Boyfriend from the Future” is an easy romantic comedy. Especially since its director Richard Curtis wrote Notting Hill and directed Love Actually. The original title of the film is About Time, which could have been adapted as It's About Time. However, the translators again decided to go in some strange way.

And here the fault lies not only with the localizers. After all, the trailer is also mounted as if the viewer is waiting for a typical melodrama. Movies just aren't like that. This is a thin, wise and sad film about the importance of every minute spent with loved ones.

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13. real ghouls

What We Do in the Shadows

• New Zealand, 2014.
• Comedy, horror.
• Duration: 85 minutes.
• IMDb: 8.6.

Cameramen are reporting on the daily life of several immortal vampires living under the same roof. They can fly, drink blood and sleep in coffins. They also argue about whose turn it is to wash the dishes and clean the house.

Soon, a newcomer joins the company, who was originally supposed to be a victim, but accidentally turned into a ghoul. A conflict is brewing between him and the old-timers: the new convert does not want to honor traditions and keep his nature a secret.

New Zealand comedians Taika Waititi and Jemaine Clement have taken the popular vampire theme and successfully combined it with the genre. mockumentary. The result is an absolutely wonderful film with a great sense of humor and cool acting.

In the original, the tape is called quite poetically: "What are we doing in the shadows." But in the Russian box office, it came out under the strange title "Real Ghouls". Perhaps the translator had in mind the popular domestic series "Real Boys", also, by the way, made in the mockumentary genre. But such a vulgar renaming, rather, repelled potential viewers.

And relatively recently, a series based on "Real Ghouls" was released on the screens, the action of which takes place in the same universe, only with other characters. And then the translators - thank you very much - decided not to change anything and left the original title "What We Do in the Shadows" intact.

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