Why you shouldn't leave your comfort zone and what to do with it then
Miscellaneous / / May 30, 2021
You can develop without stress.
You may have seen motivating pictures where "Comfort Zone" is written next to a small circle, and outside of it there is an area where "miracles happen." Actually, such illustrations best express a popular idea: in order to develop and achieve good results, and not live your dull, gray life, you must definitely overcome yourself and do something difficult and unpleasant.
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This idea has been replicated so much that it seems to be an axiom. But the truth is, you don't have to go out and not be there. a loserwho has achieved nothing.
What is a comfort zone and why it is recommended to leave it
Usually, it means a fictional space in which a person is calm, comfortable and relaxed. A sort of "rotten swamp" in which everything has been familiar for a long time and nothing interesting happens.
The comfort zone can be work in the same organization for many years, weekends at home and vacations at beach resort from year to year, a well-established group of friends, a familiar hobby, a standard set of dishes for lunch and dinner. It also happens the other way around - when the endless change of impressions, people and events is comfortable.
The bottom line is that a person gets used to any conditions, they become predictable and understandable for him. Moreover, theoretically, an unloved work can be a comfort zone, and poverty, and destructive relationships. But not because a person is good in all this, but because it is more familiar and easier for him to stay in the current situation than to change something.
The idea that miracles are born outside the usual circle - in conditions of discomfort, suffering and overcoming all kinds of obstacles, - did not arise from motivational books by Brian Tracy and Tony Robbins, although they actively support. Much earlier, back in 1908, scientists Robert Yerkes and John Dodson forcedThe relation of strength of stimulus to rapidity of habit ‐ formation mice walk through mazes under different lighting conditions, and some rodents were electrocuted at the same time. The animals that got the discharge did the job better and faster. From this, the researchers concluded that moderate stress can be useful and motivating, and not only for mice, but also for humans.
This means that in order to achieve good results, you need to constantly shake yourself up. Quitting your job, taking a trip, relocating, embarking on a challenging project, forging new relationships - in a word, challenge your fears.
Why stepping out of your comfort zone isn't really necessary
Remember the pyramidA theory of human motivation Abraham Maslow? One of the main thoughts of this theory is that the desire to develop and think about self-actualization appears when all other needs that are at lower levels are satisfied pyramids. That is, when a person is full, healthy and feels security in all senses.
Security doesn't really fit in with stressful conditions. Let's say someone finally dared to leave their comfort zone and quit their disgusting job - and found themselves in a situation where he has no time for finding himself and not for development, but urgently needs to get a new job before the financial pillow. And someone else decided to radically deal with their social anxiety - and spoke at the "Open Microphone", but all the time I was thinking only about how to get out of there as soon as possible and find myself in silence and loneliness.
Child psychologist Julia Gippenreiter confirms this contradiction in her book “Communicate with the child. How?". She refers to the work of another psychologist - Lev Vygotsky - and says that children learn faster and more effectively. new, when the situation around them is calm, and the task becomes more complicated gradually and is in the zone of the nearest development.
There is an opinionWhen to Stay Inside Your Comfort Zonethat staying in your comfort zone is the healthiest and most effective choice. And instead of going out somewhere, you need to expand this zone so that as many activities as possible become comfortable.
How to expand your comfort zone
1. Figure out how much you need it
It is quite possible that everything is fine with you, your life is more than satisfied with you, to the principled changes you do not strive, and "shortcomings" absolutely do not prevent you from getting what you want.
For example, shyness and isolation turn into a problem only for those who want to work with people. And for a reclusive freelancer, these are just character traits. Creativity and the ability to think outside the box are needed for an editor, marketer, manager, or artist. Whereas for accountants and lawyers, first of all, something completely different is important, and they may not particularly worry about the fact that they are not too creative in their work.
This does not mean that there is no need to develop at all. Rather, it is worth expanding your comfort zone in a different direction.
2. Define your comfort zone
Try to understand exactly where it ends at you, which actions are easy and stress-free, and which ones make you nervous.
Let's say shy a person is afraid to talk about himself and his achievements and this interferes with his career. In this case, it would be good to determine where this fear begins. For example, at a meeting with friends, he calmly talks about success and about himself in general, but boasting about social networks and even more so to make a competent self-presentation at an interview - he is already very, very heavy.
If you understand the limits of your capabilities, it will be easier to smoothly expand your comfort zone, not to go too far and not drive yourself into stress.
3. Do not hurry
Psychologist Andy Molinsky believesThis is when stepping outside your comfort zone is a bad ideathat the division into a "comfort zone" and "a place where miracles happen" is not entirely correct. It is more correct to speak of three zones:
- Comfort - everything is predictable, understandable and calm.
- Stretching is difficult, but you can live.
- Panic - very hard and scary.
For the same person who finds it difficult to declare himself, the first step towards expanding his comfort zone can be a simple task: write a post on a social network or speak at a working five-minute meeting. But it will most likely be difficult for him to go to a professional conference with a report right away.
You need to strive not to go immediately beyond the "stretch" zone, but to move gradually and do exactly as much as possible without fear, tachycardia, sweaty palms and sleepless nights.
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