What people regret, looking back on his life in 30, 40 and 50 years
A Life / / December 19, 2019
One young man, a user Quora, Asked a question of interest to many: what people regret, looking back on his life, when they are 30, 40, 50... years? The question provoked a lively discussion, the most interesting answers from which we will share with you today.
Lessons with the particle "no"
I think it is interesting to find out what people regret before dying.
It is believed that Beethoven on his deathbed said: "applaud, my friends, the comedy is over!".
Lou Costello before his death said: "It was the best ice cream that I had to try."
I want to share with you the lessons I drew from their mistakes of youth. All of them can designate only one particle "no".
1. Do not buy things
Instead, invest in his experience. Travel. Go to the girl who told you "can be", even though she lives on the other side of the globe.
Remember, life experiences and experiences, not things - this is real life.
2. Do not do what you do not want to do
Do you think that you have time to catch everything. But this is not the case. And at one point, did not you realize that your time is up. Just too late. You lived your life, but not the way they wanted. You ran for something aloof.
Do you have a goal? Fine. Not promazhte.
3. Do not try to please everyone
No one is more worthy of love than you. I wish I had thought of it too late. I spent time in vain, trying to win over completely foreign to me.
The money that you have lost, you can earn. Even 5 minutes of wasted time - this is what you lost forever.
4. Do not aspire to start a relationship with someone who loves another man
Relationship with a man who loves another, and the other does not, you are doomed. This kind of black hole, which lost all your bright emotions and feelings, and you only emptiness remains. You get lost in it and will not know how to get out.
When I fell in love with a man who did not love me, I felt like a soulless robot. And then, to return to a normal life, it took me too much time.
5. Do not make promises that can not keep
... if you do not want to feel like the last scum and constantly apologizing to another person because you have not fulfilled the promise.
6. Do not wait until others will tell you "yes"
First say to yourself, "yes" for yourself and the rest will answer in the affirmative later.
7. Do not steal from the office clips
It seems a trifle. But it undermines your credibility. Be honest. Your word should be really short.
8. Do not leave space in your life that pulls you down
Do not eat junk food. Do not read the third-news. Try to stay away from peers who only do what they are gossiping in the hallway, trying to throw mud at everyone and everything. Do not spend time with people who are not going to go through life.
9. Do not regret
It may seem that all of the above - my regrets. But this is not the case. It is a kind of tattoo to remember that with me to this day.
You can not go back in time, we can not fix it, and to think about their failures and mistakes - it is useless and stupid.
Do not bookmark the pages that you have already read.
Today, everything will start again. But remember that your tomorrow will largely depend on your today.
lessons list
- Invest in a good deal of money, while you are young.
- Be generous, but do not let people sit around your neck.
- Travel every time I get the chance. Do not miss a single opportunity.
- Live a least a year abroad. So you will understand that the world is not confined to your little corner.
- Love, friendship and health care - is something that can not be postponed.
I think the most important thing - it's just live and not give up. Always and under all circumstances.
Leave regret for later
You ask, what regret their thirties and forties, looking back on his life. It is commendable that you are thinking about it in his youth. My advice to you: Find your way, Deal with the case to which you belong to the soul, and be happy. A pity until later, in the 50 and 60 years, you will have plenty of time to think about them.
It may sound melodramatic, but no matter how much you are happy in old age you will still be about anything to regret.
Let's divide the most common regret into three groups.
1. Mistakes you want to avoid
In his youth, we tend to overestimate the significance of our mistakes. We think we have done something irreparable, but we forget that we have a whole life trying to fix it.
When you are 50 years old, you laugh at a number of errors that have committed in his youth. You'll even notice the young people who make the same mistakes that you made in the past. Eventually you will come to realize that all the errors and omissions, even if they have left behind the scars - it's part of the story, from which your life was going. Believe me, in 20-30 years in the company of friends you will be apt to let the jokes about his mistakes of youth. Your mistakes have been necessary. Forgive yourself.
2. What you could do, but they did
In 20 years, you regret that was not invited to a meeting pleasant girl, but you are full of optimism, because you know that you will still be presented an opportune moment.
When you are older, you will regret of another kind: you will regret about the risks that have not dared to take on, and the opportunities that are missed. You may be assailed by doubts from the category of "what if I had acted differently then?". You think that your life might have turned out quite differently: you may have a big house, cool car and a beautiful wife.
Good or bad, but no one will ever know how it would be. Of course, you can harass a constant doubts and build in your head a parallel universe in which your life is perfect. But you must learn to let go unfulfilled.
3. Heavy burden of time that you spent in vain
Most of all I regret the time spent foolishly. It seems to me that I will die without seeing Machu Picchu, did not learn to speak French, and did not build their own home. The older I get, the more pointless hours spent is added to my life. Time passes very quickly, remember this.
If you want to do something - do it now!
I'm sorry I did not quit his job many years ago and went to Austria to snowboard all winter. But I'm doing it now. And now I regret that spent time writing this response, while outside the window beckons me wonderful weather.
If you want to do something - do it now. Tomorrow may never come.
What people regret in 70 years
I read and wonder that many people are so few regrets. I'm almost 70 years old and, although I am quite happy with my life, if I decided to write down all his regret, then I would have a material for an entire book. I'm sorry for each of his stupid decisions and ill-considered actions. I regret every opportunity that I missed. The list is long. I try not to regret, but I'm sure there is something to regret.
I've always been quite assured, I have a nice big family and I love my wife. But I still regret that 50 years ago did not had the courage and met a charming girl, who was sitting at the next table in the university cafeteria and smiling at me.
Life is a game
Life - a game in which there are rules and players. You know, you lose or win. But the game is luck, fraud and false opponents moves. The game is unpredictable, and that is unfortunate now that can play in your favor in the future. This and interesting life.
Follow your dream
I regret that I did not follow their dreams in young age. I decided that I definitely need to go to university. If I could believe in themselves, to fulfill their dreams and desires, and not just be worried about how in the future to find a good job, but now my life would be very different.
I would like to go back and talk with you twenty years. I would advise itself to think twice, consider alternatives before taking expensive loans for education, which does not belong to the soul. I have decided to invest the money that I spent on the study, in a small business, and it would be a real school of life. Or, alternatively, I would advise to get yourself another profession, which has always dreamed of, and would become a screenwriter. Who knows, maybe I would have presented to the world some masterpiece, if listened to his heart in 20 years, and not for others.
Spend time with children
My main regret is that I did not spend time with their children (from the moment they are born until the time they reached adolescence). I was obsessed with work and thought it was my only important duty and responsibility - to provide for his family. I was wrong.
This time is not come back, so now I often say to their children as an adult, I'm sorry that the only living work, and urge them not to repeat my mistake.
I was very lucky because I have a good and loving wife, who forgave me my eternal employment, and well taken care of our children. But when we look at family photographs of the time, they clearly someone is not enough... Me.
If you have children, they should be your top priority. Attend school events, sporting events, family trips and just to all the events that are relevant for your children.
What do you think about this?