5 steps on the path to change in yourself and life

Have you ever tried to convince the other person to lose weight or quit smoking? Most likely, your idea has failed. Even if people agree, it is not moved from words to action.

Take specific actions when you are mentally and emotionally ready for change - a direct path to failure. In order to assess their readiness to use transteoreticheskuyu model changes designed psychologist James Prochazka (James Prochaska) and Di Carlo Clemente (Carlo DiClemente) in 80s XX century.

What is transteoreticheskaya model changes

ModelThe transtheoretical model of health behavior change consists of five stages, passing through which you can achieve lasting change in their lives.

1. Disinterest. You have no real desire to act, you do not take any measures.
2. Consideration. Do you have the desire, but there is no real commitment that will make you do something.
3. Cooking. Do you want to take action for a month, ready for action.
4. Act. You are taking concrete actions to change. As a rule, these are the first six months of successful changes.
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5. It Is maintaining. You have successfully changed for over six months. Are you sure you can keep changing, but still there is a chance to roll back.

At each stage, you can spend a different time from hours to decades. But this action to move to another level is always the same, regardless of the person and purpose.

For each stage has its own specific strategies, which will help remove resistance, to ensure progress and to prevent rollback.

How to find your place in this model

Ask yourself two questions and check the answers on a scale of 0 to 10.

1. How important are these changes to your life right now?
2. How confident are you that you can make these changes now?

Now, match it to a stage:

• 0-3 - a lack of interest;
• 4-7 - consideration;
• 8-10 - preparation and action.

Now you definitely appear to be on a stage, and you can work on the transition to the next stage.

What to do at each stage

Step 1. disinterestedness

You do not plan to do anything in the next six months, to resist change, include the protection of: "It's just not for me" or "I'm too busy, I do not have time for this." You may have demoralized the past unsuccessful attempts. Fearing another failure, you risk getting stuck for a long time at this stage.

What to do

Now it is important to increase your awareness. In one week, pay attention to the internal dialogue and mark cognitive distortions - abnormal thoughts, amplifying negative emotions, such as "I'll never be better", "The result is always the same, so why try."

Here are the most common cognitive distortions:

1. Filter ideas - fixation on one negative circumstance. For example, you want to lose weight, but you can not give up sugar and only think about how badly you will be without sweets.
2. generalization - the belief that you will not succeed, because in the past have never worked. For example, you may be afraid of public speaking because of a disastrous speech.
3. The tendency to underestimate the positive - underestimation of the benefits that can be obtained from the changes, as well as their own capabilities to implement these changes. You concentrate on your weaknesses and failures.

Because of these errors, you are stuck in the false beliefs and do nothing. If you're familiar with these cognitive distortions, monitor and correct. Here are some ways:

1. In order to overcome generalization, look for examples of success in his past.
2. Brainstorm and sketch out a list of what you get from the changes.
3. To get rid of the negative line of thought, think about the good things in your life.
4. If you catch yourself thinking, "Yes, but ...", replace it with "Yes... and". For example, you think: "Yes, but if I was promoted, I'll have to do even more presentations that I hate. " Change this thought on this: "Yes, if I were promoted, I would do more presentations and I begin to develop, from which just crazy. "

Step 2. consideration

At this stage, you are seriously thinking about the problems that will be faced, and looking for ways to solve them. You already want to change, but do not know where to start.

From the good: at this stage you begin to imagine how changes will affect your life in a positive way. You get closer to the realization that the game is worth the candle, moving from extrinsic motivation (finding rewards and avoiding punishment) to the inside (reception of pleasure and personal benefits).

What to do

1. The main way to maintain internal motivation - to link changes to their core values. go psychological VIA test on the strengths of your character and associate them with the changes. For example, your goal - to lose weight. If your strengths - love of learning and the ability to appreciate the beauty, get a technically complex sport in which you will have a lot to learn, and enjoy the beauty tuned movements.
2. Find someone who has already achieved what you want. Contact him or read his autobiography. It will inspire you and tell you how to overcome the difficulties.

Step 3. cooking

You start to change their behavior, such as buying a subscription to a fitness club or purchase the materials you need.

What to do

1. Use visualization. Imagine how you will deal with noise and temptations on the way to the goal.
2. Create an environment that will help you change your life.
3. Protect your mood. Keep your self-confidence, even celebrating small victories on the way to the goal.
4. Create a plan for WOOP model that will help you cope with any possible interference.

WOOP acronym made up of the four words that describe the steps of creating a plan: wish (desire), outcome (result), obstacle (obstacle) and the plan (plan).

1. A wish. Describe the changes you want to implement in the next month.

Example: "I want to paint again."

2. Result. In detail, imagine the best possible outcome.

examples:

• "I feel peace and quiet, painting after work."
• "I will finish one painting to the end of the month."

3. Let. Think about the internal and external circumstances can hinder you.

examples:

• "At work I was a mad day, had to stay up late."
• "I do not have the right paints and brushes."

4. Plan. Think you will cope with the circumstances.

examples:

• "I'll ask the chief advance that needs to be done before the end of the day, so as not to be late after work."
• "I will make an audit of materials and make all the missing paint and brush."

Step 4. Act

Are you willing to change and have to implement them. At the same time you get out of your comfort zone, so at any moment can appear self-doubt, self-criticism and other signs impostor syndrome - the feeling that you are unworthy or incompetent.

Do not let perfectionism slow your growth! Allow yourself to make mistakes, consider their feedback, which will help you become better.

What to do

1. Give yourself time. For the development of new skill needs at least 20 hours. Do not throw before the pass this time, even if you think you have nothing.
2. Concentrate on the present. It is difficult only at first. When you get used to the new behavior, it becomes easy and natural. So do not think about the future, watch how everything felt right now.
3. Constantly verify with the plan. You can get carried away by the events so that lose sight of their values ​​and long-term goals. Periodically evaluate your progress and adjusts his course, if you are lost.
4. Use social support. Find like-minded people, communicate in social networks, use other methods of communication. If the previous step you can not find a coach or someone who will inspire you, do it now.

Step 5. support

You are engaged in the business for six months. Your new behavior is embedded in the way of life, it becomes part of the personality.

Now you only threatens to roll back to a former way of life. scientists have discoveredApplying the stages of changeThat about 15% of people break down at this stage and come back to lack of interest.

What to do

1. Keep track of its state. To manage your own behavior, you need to feel good. Take care to not bring themselves to exhaustion.
2. Think of how to deal with stress. He may exhaust your strength and get back to the old behavior. Remember what situations most irritate and frustrate you, and think of ways to advance the fight against stress.
3. Prevent burnout. There is no way to protect yourself from it 100%, but you can reduce the risks.
   • Leave time for the physical, mental and emotional unloading.
   • Get ritualsThat will help you tune in a working mood or, conversely, to relax.
   • Clearly distribute their time and give up everything that distracts you from the important things.
   • Communicate with family and friends. If you need support, say so.
   • Break the goal into small steps, such as meditation for 5 minutes a day or writing 100 words.
4. Refer to their intrinsic motivation. It is a way that will support you afloat when nothing else does not help. Remember what made you wish to change, what is the main reason for your efforts?

The process of change can be a feeling that you do not have enough ability and skills, so that you will want to give up everything. In fact, it is a good thing - it is a sign that you are growing and experiencing themselves. Do not give up!

Even if you rollback, remember, you can always start again moving up and save a new behavior for a long time.

see also

• 2 minutes that will change your life →
• 15 habits that will bring you out of your comfort zone and change lives for the better →
• 30 things that begin with the change for the better →