3 letters, which are able to change the situation on the job
Work And Study Books / / December 19, 2019
The phrase, "Yes, and ..."
Three letters, which are able to change the situation on the job add up to extremely powerful phrase, "Yes, and ...". Despite the apparent simplicity of its practical application can be extremely varied and diverse.
As a means of communication, the phrase "Yes, and ..." can be of great value as a management tool conflictsThat allows you to strongly disagree with someone and still communicate with them openly and respectfully.
In itself, "yes" it is the affirmation and acts as a signal for the end of the conversation, when to consider not offered any new information. "Yes," in combination with "and" demonstrates respect, because it implies a focus and concentration.
"Yes" means careful attention to what is said by someone else. "I" serves as a connecting element, which allows to express your own thoughts, which can be supported or not supported at your proposed idea.
"Yes" indicates that you fully listen to what someone has just said that you have tried to understand this, and that you are willing to consider it at least be what it seems at first glance. "And," uttered in a confident tone, respectfully opens the door for the use of your own point of view.
Transcript:
- "Yes" = I hear what you say. You own my undivided attention. I firmly intend to listen to you and understand as best as I can.
- "I" = I understand you very well. That's how I can support you. That's what I can do for you. That's how I'm grateful for what you have shared with me.
Why should you spend time and effort on such a seemingly small change in the tone and language? Because you have to work with people. The better you do, the more successful you are. Use phrases in the dialogue, "Yes, and ..." can be an effective means of strengthening relations. The phrase helps people better communicate together.
Consider an example. If one person says, "God, this kitchen is so hot", the second does not say: "Not at all, I was terribly cold," or "We are not in the kitchen. We are in the Jacuzzi on a cruise ship. " Both deny the allegations, deny and otherwise undermine the proposal which was made by the first man. Guided by the principle "Yes, and ..." could be answered as follows: "Yes, unbearably hot. And the fact that I set fire to the house, will not help us. "
Watching improvisers on stage, the audience is no need to know what performers take and use any particular philosophy - the audience just react to what amuses them, or are interested in impressive. The same principle is invisible, "Yes, and ..." I have to be in communication. Visible to be real communication, rather than the use of the techniques.
The phrase, "Yes, but ..."
At first glance it may seem that replacing "Yes, and ..." to "Yes, but ..." is not a big deal, but its psychological effects can be quite profound.
"Yes, but ..." it is not a polite way of saying "no." In fact, it's just a condescending form of "no." When people use in communicating the phrase "Yes, but ...", they deny, deny, restrict or somehow alter I heard - at least, so it seems their interlocutors, especially when it is repeated regularly throughout long time.
Little change from "but" for "and" is able to have a powerful impact on how the message is perceived. "But," excludes everything that preceded it, and closes the discussion on the topic. "I" extends the theme and suggests further consideration.
If the speech you use most often the phrase "Yes, but ...", you will accustom people to react negatively. After the collision with the "Yes, but ..." they leave with the feeling that they gagged and thrown out because their idea is worth nothing. They were denied the opportunity to be heard. Over time, these negative feelings will limit the contributions that an employee makes or tries to make to the success of the project or business.
But do not forget that, "Yes, and ..." is not a panacea or a magic elixir that can cure all ills. Sometimes, the only correct answer becomes "No".
In his book "Business improvisation. Tactics, techniques, strategies,"Bob Kulhan adapted the experience of theatrical improvisation, its technology, the basic principles and strategies for the development of corporate culture. It offers an extensive arsenal of tools that readers can apply at the individual level, in communication with one person, and at the organizational level, where thousands of workers.
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