6 situations in the relationship, when to lie
Relations / / December 19, 2019
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1. When the move away from abyuzera
If you decide to withdraw from destructive relationships and prepare the way for retreat, tell lies recklessly. Your main task - to lull attention aggressorTo start saving money, collect things, to establish contacts with people who can help emerge from this abyss.
In particular, should help it if you want to find out at the end of the relationship, although usually at the emotional violence victims is neither the strength nor the desire. The reaction of the aggressor is unpredictable, if he understands that the victim breaks off the hook. And it is better to be alive and healthy than the right and honest.
2. When your partner asks: "Loved (a) Do you have someone stronger than me?"
If you have not previously agreed on the absolute, absolute honesty, answer "no." Let's say it was a stronger sense than the current in your life. This will be easier if you tell the truth?
Reveal his real feelings, you pull out a well-hidden skeleton out of the closet, and set the table to third.
So leave it to the dressing room and did not hesitate to lie. Unless, of course, deep down you do not plan to return to the previous love - such plans to hide from current partner is dishonest.
3. When preparing a surprise
According to the law of meanness in a man who is ready for a surprise, exacerbated all the feelings, there is a third eye and the ability to see through walls - in short, is a good chance that he still understands ahead of time. Therefore, most likely, it is necessary not just to lie on the go, and to weave a web of lies to keep the surprise a secret. Make sure that was not true inoffensive, or run the risk of losing half before you get to the day of H.
4. When the move away from the whole quite good person
your love tomatoes withered and wilted, and you collect the bags. Former partner probably wondering what was wrong. Do not rush to greet him with the whole list of offenses. Are you sure you break a reason - its shortcomings? Or simply convenient to justify his departure, accusing the former lover of all sins?
Of good people too go. "I do not get along" - not just a duty reason for separation.
5. When you are doing a compliment to cheer up mate
Let's say your girlfriend had a cold and glossy beauty turned into a beauty with a swollen nose and red eyes. The phrase "You look great" and is not a lie at all, because the girl is a mirror, she knows the truth. It's just another way show love.
6. When it's not your secret
All property acquired during marriage is considered common, but do not include the secrets of your friends to it. Not necessarily full of details compose fake web history, just answer "do not know" on the uncomfortable question about his acquaintance.
psychologist comment
Adrian Imzh
Consultant psychologist.
First and foremost you need to understand the definitions. Lie - deliberate distortion of information or its replacement by other facts. Relationship - the interaction of two respected and people loving each other.
Therefore, in the case of abyuzerom we are not talking about lies in the relationship: they are no longer. Is the salvation of their lives, health and well-being. In other situations, it is important what the pair negotiated, whether it has the respect and request for feedback in a given situation. Another point - the reason for the distortion of the facts. I'm afraid to hurt or deceive his partner to take advantage of?
If we start from the position relationship of trust and agreements, it makes sense to them and build. Does your partner like surprises? (And if not, it is better not to make them.) It would be desirable if I discuss with him why I'm leaving him? The most successful variant - to decide whether to lie or not needed, based on the relationships that exist at the moment.
In case, if the relationship is built on the manipulation, the lies they already have a lot of it, and it is unlikely to benefit.
see also
- Why do we lie and how to fight it →
- 4 lie method using statistic →
- 21 is a sign that your relationship to the dogs roll →