Can unrequited love be beneficial?

When your feelings are rejected, it hurts and hurts. But if you find yourself in such a situation, do not despair: unrequited love can also bring benefits. And that's why.

You will learn to respect yourself and your feelings

At first glance, this is a controversial statement. After all, the opposite is often true. A person, realizing that he is not being reciprocated, may lose self confidence. He often thinks: there is something wrong with me, because literally everyone around me is happy in love - and only I am doomed to be rejected. After all, when you are not noticed or simply ignored, it is difficult to respect yourself. But it’s easy to feel sorry.

But try to separate the pain from the pleasant and exciting emotions that you have already experienced. Yes, among them there was hope for reciprocity, but not only. You most likely admired the person, rejoiced at the unexpected meeting with him and looked forward to a new one. You might be familiar with the tenderness that arises every time you remember your hero.

There are probably many such feelings. Yes, next to them there may be pain. But she does not erase these emotions, does not cancel them. And all your wonderful experiences are valuable in themselves. Let the relationship you dreamed of not work out. But no one will take away your moments of joy and pleasant excitement, or make you forget the feeling of happiness and flight.

Think that your feelings are worthy of careful and careful consideration. Just like you yourself - a person who has access to such a bright range of emotions.

Unrequited love - not the most pleasant reason to start treating your feelings with respect. But try to do it anyway. Maybe you will see that this attitude towards yourself is a good way not only not to lower your self-esteem, but also to significantly raise it.

You can learn a lot about yourself

Everything is simple here. Every lover dreams. He doesn’t slow down his imagination, doesn’t tell himself: “Stop it, this will never come true.” A person allows himself to forget about conventions, restrictions and surrender to dreams.

Then some reproach themselves for dreaming too boldly, because their beautiful expectations did not become a reality. And if you also start to blame yourself for daydreaming, stop. The imagination does not have to accurately predict the future; it may well be wrong in its predictions.

Therefore, it is worth remembering what you dreamed about. And again separate these memories from the pain. Then you will be able to see what you are missing in the present. And think about how you yourself can fill this gap.

Perhaps, when you remember and analyze the pictures that your imagination drew, you will better understand your needs.

For example, you thought it would be great to walk around the city, hold hands and talk about everything in the world. And feel free from evaluative glances and the desire to meet someone else’s standards - that is, simply be yourself.

Consider whether there are people around you with whom you do not need to wear a mask. And if there is, then try to spend more time with them. And if not, think about what needs to be done to make them appear.

It is believed that the experience of unrequited feelings is an important experience for adolescents. It allows young people see, what they expect from love, what seems most valuable to them in a partner and relationship, what feelings they are able to experience and how these emotions change their perception of life.

However adults They can also learn a lot about themselves. And be surprised by your own discoveries.

You will learn to understand other people better

Maybe you will be a little consoled by the fact that the second person in an unhappy couple also suffers. Scientists from the American Psychological Association studied the feelings experienced by both unrequited lovers and those who could not share their passions. And they found out: those who reject believe that they are not to blame for anything. But still are worried disappointment and grief at having unwittingly caused pain to another.

You can try to put yourself in the shoes of someone who rejected your feelings.

The joyful experiences that you experienced are inaccessible to him. His world didn't get any brighter. But he still felt pain, albeit not as severe. It sounds paradoxical, but perhaps we should sympathize with him too.

Maybe, having experienced the whole gamut of feelings you have been given, you will begin to treat other people more carefully. And you will probably receive gratitude, understanding, and respect in return. And over time, perhaps you will be ready to build new relationship.

You can express yourself through creativity

Yes, you've probably heard that many poets, artists, and writers began to create when they experienced unrequited love. Try to follow their example.

To start writing poetry or prose, you only need a piece of paper and a pen. Or a smartphone. Try to pour out everything you feel onto paper or the screen. Tested by many: after you have a couple of rhyming lines, you will feel a surge of inspiration. And maybe keep creating.

May you not end up with a masterpiece. Although, who knows, maybe you’ll find something new vocation. But in any case, you may feel better.

And remember: if, despite all efforts, melancholy and despondency do not recede, you can think about visiting a psychologist. It will help you overcome a difficult period and benefit even from the experiences of rejected love.