How to achieve everything you want: the formula for success from Jessica Cox - the world's first pilot without arms
Miscellaneous / / April 16, 2023
It doesn’t matter at all what you lack - body parts or self-confidence, the heroine believes.
Jessica Cox leads a vibrant and eventful life: diving, flying, speaking at conferences and fighting for the rights of people with disabilities. However, to achieve all this, she had to go through many difficulties, because the girl was born with a rare birth defect.
We tell the story of the first woman to fly a plane without hands, and share her tips for making her dream come true.
"Don't feel sorry for her"
1983 State of Arizona, USA. At a Sierra Vista hospital, a young woman in labor, Inez Cox, is in labor and doctors give her C-section. There is a crying baby. Inez breathes a sigh of relief. However, the smiles that have just appeared on the faces of the medical staff are quickly replaced by anxious whispers. Inez's belly is covered with a screen, so she can't see her newborn daughter.
- What's the matter? the woman asks.
“Your child has no arms,” the doctor replies quietly.
So February 2 was born
Jessica Cox. In the 1980s, ultrasound tools were not as advanced as they are today. Therefore, the baby's parents were completely unprepared for the appearance of a child with a rare birth defect.Jessica's mother is from the Philippines. There, children born with disabilities often had an unenviable fate: they could not make friends or find a normal job. Ines was seized with anxiety for the future of her daughter. At first she was crying all the time.
When the doctor brought the girl to her parents, they were so broken that none of them reached out to her.
"I will always feel this emptiness, - wrote then Jessica. “I was denied that first, most important, contact with my parents.”
However, Jessica's mother soon managed to get out of depression. She decided that she would do anything to give her daughter a good childhood. When curious passers-by approached her and began to lament over the health of the child, Inez answered: “Do not feel sorry for her. She will be smart."
"I was a lousy child"
Parents tried to make sure that Jessica did not feel "wrong". They raised her on a par with other children and never showed pity. Mother always said, "You can be whatever you want." However, despite such efforts, Jessica still found it difficult to adapt to the environment.
Jessica Cox
From the autobiographical book Disarm Your Limits.
I threw tantrums. Kicking, screaming, biting. I was a lousy child. I couldn't understand why I'm different from everyone else, why people react to me differently. This made me so angry that my father often had to lock me in a room so that I would not harm anyone in the family.
From early childhood, Jessica had to study to live in a world completely unsuitable for her. However, she was determined to get it.
In her book, she wrote that she did not want to fall behind her brother and sister. Therefore, during joint games used her legs - took toys with them or hit the ball. And when someone told her that she could not do something because of the lack of hands, the heroine achieved this in spite of the commentators.
Therefore, the girl had many hobbies: she was engaged in dancing and modeling, loved to read books and walk. And at the age of 10, Jessica signed up in a taekwondo circle, where after four years she received a black belt. For her, the instructors even created a separate curriculum. For example, instead of punching, Cox learned to strike with her knee.
"They called me Robot Girl and Captain Hook"
Jessica's parents tried to integrate her into the environment as much as possible, so they enrolled the girl in a regular public school, and not in an institution for children with special needs. However, there Jessica still felt limited.
On the court during the break, she tried to join the game with everyone, but she constantly received refusals: those around her said that it was not safe for her. And the prosthetic hands, which were supposed to help, on the contrary, spoiled her life even more.
Jessica Cox
From the autobiographical book Disarm Your Limits.
Other children were biased towards prostheses. They called me Robot Girl and Captain Hook.
All this made Jessica more withdrawn. She had close friends, but deep down she envied their "commonness", because of which she often initiated conflicts.
Only at the age of 14, when the Cox family moved to Tucson, did the girl decide to give up prostheses forever. On the first day in 8th grade, she locked them in the closet, then she picked out a beautiful outfit for herself and for the first time shaved her legs. When she got to the bus stop, she was in high spirits.
“I wanted to be the real Jessica. And the real Jessica doesn't wear fake hands - then remembered she. “Getting rid of prosthetics was the most inspiring thing I have ever done.” This gave her confidence in her own abilities.
“We are all limited in our own way”
When Jessica was in high school, the teachers asked her to give a speech to seventh graders who were enrolled in a special program for talented children from poor families.
At first, the heroine fell into a stupor and did not understand what she could talk about so unusual. But nevertheless she agreed. Jessica shared with them stories from her life - how she learned to live without hands and what it gave her.
Jessica Cox
From the autobiographical book Disarm Your Limits.
One by one, they started to come up to me and say how inspired they were by my speech. I realized that my lack of arms resonated with their own life problems. After all, we are all limited in some way.
Jessica calls this moment one of the key ones. With the support of those around her, she emerged from her shell and began to communicate more openly with those around her. She wrote that this conversation not only inspired others, but also helped her herself: the story of her life turned out to be a kind of therapy for Jessica.
So she decided to become an orator. In order to competently compose motivational speeches and work with large audiences, Jessica enrolled at the University of Arizona with a degree in Psychology and Communication and received a bachelor's degree.
“Getting up my courage, I overcame fear”
After graduating from high school, Jessica set herself a new goal: to overcome her biggest fear - flying. She enrolled in aviation school and after three years of grueling training became a certified pilot.
The girl learned to fly a light sports aircraft Ercoupe 415-C, which has no pedals. Thanks to its unique design, Jessica could hold the steering wheel with one foot and the throttle lever with the other.
Since then, the girl has continued to pilot and spends a lot of time traveling around the country and demonstrating her skills at various air shows and events. She even entered the Guinness Book of Records as the first woman to fly on an airplane with her feet.
In 2015, the girl published autobiographical book self-help Disarm Your Limits, in which she talked about her formula for achieving goals using piloting as an example. According to her, in order to fulfill any dream, a person must be guided by several principles:
- Strive for adventure. They inspire us to take full advantage of the opportunities that come along the way and add zest to life's routine.
- Passionately desire what you want to achieve. Without this, you are unlikely to finish the job.
- Be brave. Courage is the strength that helps overcome all fears.
- Choose new creative solutions. As long as you use qualities such as ingenuity and resourcefulness, you will definitely find a way out of any problem.
- Keep a balance. To achieve success, you need to feel that all areas of your life are balanced.
- Be tenacious. This trait will help you overcome air resistance while "flying". With perseverance, you can get through any setback.
- Don't give up support. Family, friends, mentors - all these people will be able to lift you up from the bottom. Don't be afraid to ask them for advice and help.
- Stay honest.Sincerity is the power that elevates your goals to another level of clarity.
- Believe in yourself no matter what. Most of the difficulties on your way can be overcome only in this way.
Jessica Cox
From the autobiographical book Disarm Your Limits.
People often don't understand how I learned to fly the plane with my feet. This achievement is the end result of my psychological journey of overcoming barriers. Gathering my courage, I overcame my fear. Finally, having accepted her features, she got rid of shame. I didn't just overcome my disability physically. I also defeated her mentally.
In addition to piloting, the girl is engaged surfing and diving, skydiving and paragliding. In addition, Jessica continues to give motivational speeches about her experiences and help people with disabilities around the world.
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