3 things you need to unlearn to do to be successful at work

Usually, to climb the career ladder, we use the same methods: we expand the scope of responsibility, we try to increase the salary, we are chasing a high position. We try to do more to get more. And we rarely think about what we need to get rid of in order to free up space, time and energy to achieve new goals.

This is what it means to “unlearn” — to give up knowledge, ideas and behaviors that prevent us from learning new useful skills and becoming better. You could say that unlearning is also learning to do something else. To do this, you need to go through three stages:

• Realize and accept that some of your current actions are ineffective and inappropriate.
• Find up-to-date information behavior patterns and thinking to replace such actions.
• Immerse yourself in the collected material to secure the new and let go of the old.

The whole process looks not too complicated and intuitive. But the first step, figuring out exactly what you need to wean yourself from, is often the hardest. Here are a few things you can skip to get started.

1. Thinking that suffering leads to success

This idea is deeply rooted in work ethic with such expressions as "You can't even pull a fish out of a pond without difficulty" and "Water does not flow under a lying stone." We are convinced that we must work longer and harder, and rest and breaks are for the weak.

Employment has become a status symbol. If we are not busy, then we are not doing our best to achieve success. It is this belief that leads to burnout and health problems and makes people feel unhappy in the workplace.

If you recognize yourself in this description and want to unlearn how to think like that, try to rest more and take breaks more often. Go for short walks during lunch or reduce the number of hours you spend working on weekends.

2. Gossip about colleagues

If there is an occupation that devours time and attracts almost everyone, it is gossip. People regularly discuss and sometimes judge other people. But put yourself in the shoes of a person who is constantly talked about, and you will understand that gossip not only takes time, it destroys trust and damages relationships.

Gossip is hard to give up because it serves an important purpose. Throughout human history gossip were a sure way to get close to others or isolate those who do not share the interests of the team. Gossip can give a sense of kinship, which is why it is so attractive.

To unlearn how to gossip, standard phrases prepared in advance will come in handy. You can discreetly change the subject or be direct, such as "I don't want to gossip about others." In any case, the rejection of gossip will only benefit everyone.

3. Focus on weaknesses

At the end of a stressful day, we often look back at what we have done and notice how much we did not have time. Or considering the possibility change jobs, we are sad about the experience that we do not have. We pay attention to what we lack before we see opportunities. Such thinking prevents us from taking risks, and also prevents us from appreciating and multiplying our achievements.

To unlearn how to see the glass as always half empty, you need to take time to reflect on successes and lessons. It's worth it. Research showthat employees who spent 15 minutes at the end of each day thinking about lessons learned were 23% better after 10 days than employees who didn't think about any of these.

The next time you start obsessing over something that isn't working or you're missing something, switch your attention to what you can learn from that situation. Even in the most difficult work, there are moments when we make the right decisions, masterfully cope with problems and build strong relationships. Notice and appreciate such moments.