Where to look for friends in adulthood: 7 great ideas from Lifehacker readers
Miscellaneous / / July 24, 2022
For example, in online games, thematic communities, interest clubs and more.
«Let me know” is a rubric for the stories of our readers. Every week we launch a survey and look forward to your comments. This time we publish a selection of ideas where you can find like-minded people even in adulthood.
1. At work
Take a closer look at your colleagues - perhaps with one of them you have long wanted to talk closer? You can make a list of people and invite them one by one to chat over a cup of coffee.
If you work remotely and it is difficult to organize a joint lunch snack, there is an opportunity to de-virtualize with someone from a work chat in another way. For example, write to colleagues in social networks.
And to make your proposal to meet look appropriate, start the correspondence with an unobtrusive question: “Hi! I am impressed with your project. Can we grab a bite to eat so you can talk more about its development?" Or: “You wrote in the chat that you are into photography. May I ask you to give me a basic lesson?”
In addition, there is always the opportunity to make friends with someone at a corporate party. If you are worried that the person will be difficult to talk to, prepare a short list of topics in advance.
2. In hobby clubs
It is easiest to find friends among like-minded people - those who share your interests and hobbies. Look for groups of people doing what they love together.
For example, if you have been wanting to get into geocaching for a long time, check out the geocaching dedicated to it. website and join the search for hiding places, and at the same time - and friends. There are also many sports clubs - for chess lovers, and for bodybuilders, and for those who are fond of shooting. In such places, you are likely to communicate a lot with people who are close to you in spirit.
If there is nothing similar nearby, take the initiative in your own hands and organize an interest circle yourself - this is how one of our readers created a book club.
Older people should also not be shy about meeting new people. For example, by joining theMoscow longevity”, metropolitan pensioners can find new goals in life and make friends.
Anonymous
I found friends in the drawing workshop at the Moscow Longevity Center. At first, it was embarrassing to start doing creative work at 62 years old. I was afraid that I would come and sit on the sidelines. But in the end I learned to hold a brush and met good people.
In addition, you may not be united with other people hobbybut life circumstances. So, some users wrote to us that they found friends in the regional dog clubs. And one of the anonymous readers said that during the decree, communication with other young mothers helped her.
Catherine
While on maternity leave, you can meet the same mothers in the yard or on the playground. Communication during this period is very lacking. Of course, it’s not a fact that such relations will develop into truly friendly ones, but it also happens. At least at the initial stage, you will definitely have something to talk about.
3. On training courses
School and university are behind, but this does not mean that you will no longer be able to taste student life and make friends with your desk mate. There are many training courses - in English, writing, programming or cooking — that will rally you with other participants and create the basis for the emergence of friendly relations.
At the same time, it is best if the courses are long and take place offline. So in reserve you will have enough time to look at the person you are interested in - go for a coffee break, exchange a couple of words at a break, walk together to a stop.
Angelica
I made new friends in landscape design courses. Common interests help rapprochement. In addition, the fact that we had traveling workshops that brought us together played into the hands. Now these people have become closer to me than the friends of my youth.
4. At events
Concerts, stand-ups, art parties, and quizzes can also help you make friends. One of our readers wrote that sometimes it is better to come to such events without company: surrounded by friends, there is no need to get to know someone else.
In restaurants and clubs, themed events are generally held every week. For example, in a Moscow bar Marie Laveau every Thursday there are "parties for modern witches" and the team "Come on a dateorganizes "speed dating" several times a month.
Victoria
I found friends on quizzes and similar intellectual games. Here you can immediately see the general erudition of the participant, how he communicates with you and with the team and behaves in a stressful situation. From this we can draw conclusions, "your" person in front of you or not. And if the quiz is thematic - for example, based on films, TV shows, music - there will immediately be points of contact. The main task is to exchange contacts, and then overcome the fear of being intrusive and offer to meet again.
5. In online communities
In social networks, you can find both thematic channels - for book lovers, cinephiles or numismatists - and local groups for dating. Most often, communities like "Dating Penza" or "Overheard Cherepovets" have discussion threads in which people can exchange contacts.
Kristina
I was subscribed to a public about decorative rats. One day I saw a guy comment there. He wrote that his animals sneezed. I responded to suggest how to solve the problem - most likely, it was the wrong filler. On this occasion, we wrote off in a personal, but gradually moved on to everyday topics. He turned out to be awesome! We have strong interests in common. As a result, we are still in contact.
Also, the administration of thematic communities sometimes organizes gatherings - offline meetings for acquaintances and joint leisure.
6. In online games
Multiplayer online games - World of Warcraft, Overwatch, GTA 5 and others - form strong bonds between participants. Having united in guilds and clans, they go on raids together and get into various difficult situations. A common goal brings strangers together and helps build friendships.
Players often use third-party services to communicate with each other in the process, such as Discord or Skype. Some then bring the communication into the real world.
Anna
I often meet people in online games. In Crossfire, for example, I just added to a random clan - the one that is closer to the top. They accepted me, thinking that I was someone's friend. When it turned out that this was not so, it was already too late, and I remained in the party. We then communicated with these people for quite a long time - however, only on the Web.
7. Using dating services
There are offline and online services aimed at finding friends. Among them, for example, a closed women's community "zabuyki”, whose founder we interviewed. Its participants go to exhibitions together and go on trips. Another popular service is Random Coffee. It connects people by place of residence, interests and expectations from dating.
Among online applications, there are universal ones - Tinder, Hoop or Meetup - and thematic, by interests. For example:
- TourBar - for travelers;
- Plink - for gamers;
- Roomster - for neighbors;
- Tandem - for students foreign language;
- MatchDog is for dog lovers.
Nicholas
Some time ago I became interested in running, cycling, swimming. Easy registration on Strava (the application is currently not available in Russia. — Approx. ed.) significantly expanded my circle of contacts and introduced me to many like-minded people. I still cherish friendship with many of them.
Read also🧐
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