5 personal qualities without which it is difficult to achieve success
Miscellaneous / / February 21, 2022
Awareness and the ability to accept one's ignorance help to climb Olympus.
Personal development is like an empty garden that you only plan to cultivate. First you need to understand what exactly you want to "grow". It is important to figure out what helps you move forward, and what, on the contrary, pulls you back, focus on yourself and cultivate your best qualities. You can start with five main directions.
1. mindfulness
Most of the time we operate on autopilot. The strategies and responses that we acquired in early childhood or school years gradually become our basic settings. Over time, we have learned to trust them. Well, they did work! In any case, they helped to experience everything that life offered us.
Mindfulness helps you recognize automatic responses and finally look at them with fresh eyes. Of course, many of our basic settings are quite acceptable and effective. However, there are others that are long overdue.
As soon as you begin to carefully analyze your behavior, you will notice that the attitudes from childhood are no longer in the best way in the interests of a mature person. Many of them do
toxic and very hinder in a career or personal life.Don't judge yourself for the ineffective attitudes you find, because they really helped you at some point. You just need to notice them in yourself and thank them for what they have given you in the past. And then let go and be replaced by others that will move you forward now and into the future.
Take noteđ
- 5 Ways to Practice Mindfulness Without Going to a Buddhist Monastery
2. Ability to control the situation
Most of us like the idea of ââbeing in control. We attribute this to security. If we control the situation, then we will be able to protect ourselves at any moment.
The need to feel safe is one of the most important human needs. After all, we are living proof of natural selection. However, we forget that in the modern world we no longer need to worry about our physical safety as much as our ancestors did.
Fears are usually based on reality and this is different from anxiety. We often spend too much time worrying about external factors and the future. Whereas it is worth simply answering the questions of what we already control and what we want to learn to control.
The correct answer is ourselves. Of course, external circumstances affect our lives. But how we respond to them is much more important. This is how we give them power or take it away.
Keep a close eye on your thoughts, values, and beliefs. They will help you keep your life under control.
3. Adoption
Think about how often you fight during the day. It doesn't matter if it's loud, barely audible in a whisper, or just in your mind. All this gives rise to the same energy - resistance.
When we allow events to disturb our peace, we endow them with power. It doesnât matter if itâs the behavior of an annoying colleague, a technical problem, or an idea that has stuck in your head like a thorn in your head. If we allow certain factors to make us negative, our emotions turn into a ship with a broken engine on the high seas.
Positive Intelligence author Shirzad Chamin recommends treating unwanted thoughts and events as physical triggers. For example, if you take a frying pan from the stove, and it has hot pen, you immediately release it. Then why, when something unpleasant happens, we can't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day, or even several days? Why waste energy thinking âHow could you have acted so stupidly?â, âI should have listened to my intuitionâ or âIf I had done like this, everything would have been differentâ?
Some of these considerations can lead us to positive conclusions. For example, behind the question "Why didn't I listen to my intuition?" the thought âIn the future, when I make decisions, I will listen to myself and my heartâ may follow.
Try learning to accept your emotions with the 10 second rule. Its essence is to recognize your feelings - despair, anger, disappointment or guilt - and focus on them for exactly 10 seconds. You need to fully experience these emotions, and then pay tribute to them and let them go.
German writer Eckhart Tolle, bestselling author of "The Power of Now. The power of the presentâ, advises also to get rid of the âThis happens to meâ setting. It becomes the first step on a path that leads to self-pity and treating yourself as a victim. It also empowers negative emotions.
The keyword that you want to remember - acceptance. It is the best friend of inner peace. Therefore, if you want to grow as a person, do not say life "no." Say yes, accept it as it is, and move on.
4. self-knowledge
Think how well you know yourself and how your self-image is different from how you represent others. One very popular saying goes: "What do people think about me, it does not concern me." But as far as this setting is useful for personal growth?
The idea of change itself to the surrounding you have taken, it may seem tempting. Sometimes this push is also a cultural, family or national characteristics. But if you want to really get to know yourself, you need to dig deeper and try to find yourself present.
Start, for example, with a list of its key features. He's a bit "landed" and allow you to feel your own power. An even more effective way - an analysis of the potential of childhood trauma, particularly with a psychologist. So you will understand how past events shaped your present personality. You may notice certain beliefs that lurk in the shadows of your mind and seriously limit your potential, as well as affect the sense of self-worth and happiness.
self-knowledge - a long process, but it is like nothing else it helps you understand where you are now and where you want to be in the future. Gradually, you will become exactly the person that is in your dreams.
5. The ability to make his ignorance
Another part of personal growth - to accept the fact that there is something you do not know. Many seek solace in the knowledge. It's like a comfort blanket in which you can wrap. In fact, the idea that some knowledge can protect us, of course, a myth.
The ability to accept what we do not know and do not understand - an important step on the path of development. This greatly reduces stress and anxiety. In a good sense "surrender" to what is happening or may happen in the future, rather liberating experience. When you stop wasting energy on futile attempts to control or understand something that defies control, you will notice positive changes immediately.
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