Back to School: The main fears of parents and how to handle them

Kira Makarova

Child psychologist, an expert Profi.ru.

If you notice that the child began to chat with the wrong crowd, do not panic. Discuss with them new friends, but very carefully. In no case do not enter into a confrontation and do not say: "With this friendly, this is not friendly." Teenager such statements can be perceived as an attack on his personal freedom.

Listen and hear it. Hint that are in your family behave differently. Do not use categorical statements. Express their opinions very well, respecting their child-teen.

Remember: you do not fall out of the field of communication of the child: it does not matter in the primary, middle or high school, he learns. Talk to him and interest of his life. Communication is necessary to build and maintain. The ideal is to make contact with the child and to lay it all good qualities even before adolescence. Then the problems you probably did not even notice.

Kira Makarova

Child psychologist, an expert Profi.ru.

Shyness and shy may be due to different reasons. The child simply by their nature can be introverted or have a weak leadership. Then it's just a feature of personality. Demand from such a child to be the center of attention and to communicate with all - wrong. He did not need to.

Younger students are often shy, because parents make fun of their actions, appearance or thoughts. Sometimes such statements uttered in the company of friends or relatives. In my practice, such cases were. Parents think that jokes harmless, but because of them, the student will be afraid of being ridiculed and hesitate to start communicating.

In middle and high school problems of others. Adolescence - the evaluation and comparing yourself with other people - friends, classmates. You need to look with whom your child spends time - this will depend on his self-esteem and self-confidence. It is important to remember that the student can not be equally well communicate and make friends with the whole class. If he has one or two friends, this is a good indicator.

Kira Makarova

Child psychologist, an expert Profi.ru.

The main thing for any parent - child mental health. If it hurt at school, talk to him, hear, learn how it relates to this. Then, go to school, talk with the teacher and the class teacher. Maybe this will help solve the problem.

If not - you need to change school. The child needed a comfortable environment and the surrounding area. Agree that when an adult does not like the job, he did not hold on to it through the power, and goes to a new place.

Another thing I always advise to go to a psychologist. Each case is different, is that the reason of misunderstanding lies with their peers in the child. Can not close our eyes to the problem.

Valery Arkhipov

Tutor in Russian and English languages, the expert Profi.ru.

If the child does not understand the topic or subject as a whole, he can seek help from a teacher at the school, to be like extracurricular activities or schedule to the tutor.

The task of learning - are interested in the problem area of ​​expertise. Very often, children are faced with disapproval in the classroom and it psychologically difficult to believe that they are able to understand the subject. Tutor must so arrange the work, so that the student have the motivation and belief in yourself. The methods are different: for some it is a whip, for someone - a carrot. Tutor should always praise the ward for the efforts and successes.

The specialist works individually with each student, and the approach to each should also be individualized. Some guys feel relaxed when tutor behaves as in a board, another comfortable when teacher as a teacher at the school. The task of learning to understand what the baby needs.

And it is very important! Tutors should not humiliate the student and give it up to the last. We need to try different approaches and methods as a common language is found. If the coach decides to stop training for a child is a signal that it is hopeless. It may become despondent and completely cease to believe in themselves.

If the purpose of employment - to improve academic performance, a tutor can help a child with homework. But it should be the promotion and exception to the rule. Constantly make the lessons for the student can not.

Kira Makarova

Child psychologist, an expert Profi.ru.

Vaccinate your child responsibility can only by example. If you bring it to the end of their business and do what it promises, it will behave the same way. But if you are disorganized, and from the child require obedience, be prepared for the fact that nothing happens.

And do not give him clear instructions about the house: no cleaning schedule, lists on the refrigerator, ticks and promotions. Everything has to be voluntarily.

reward system - conventional system: it creates a sense of false love. It may even lead to neuroses. Ask, and do not ask. And do not forget about my own experience.

Valery Arkhipov

Tutor in Russian and English language skills Profi.ru.

Exams - it's not terrible, and do not need to fear them. Conversely, when a child is preparing for the exam, the learning process becomes more efficient. Because there are clear goals and timetables, which stimulate students to do the job quickly and efficiently.

Better, even when the student no upcoming exams coming up with his own goal. Let it be some kind of a potential option. For example, the International TOEFL exam or - for younger students - KET, PET.

If a child is severely agitated because of exams, should develop a system of incentives. To reduce the level of tension, a tutor can tell you about some event of his life, when he also suffered greatly, but, as it turned out, in vain. This will help to reassure the student.

Kira Makarova

Child psychologist, an expert Profi.ru.

Keep track of the child's schedule. He should not spend all day on their studies. It will take time to play, walking, socializing and healthy sleep. The task of parents to organize mode, so that the child still had time. If he is going to the clubs and societies, and not overwork - please. The main thing - to preserve the mental health of the child.

With proper daily routine of the children will not overwork and still have time. If you have problems, help the child to understand and correct the schedule.

Do not forget about such a concept as the leading activity. This is an area of ​​employment that contributes to human development. She at all ages is different. In elementary school, for example, the leading activity - training.

This does not mean that a child must sit all day for lessons. But in order to develop the personality, be sure to give them enough time. If in the lower grades in the child will form a responsible attitude to learning, then the school he will have no problems. Since the fifth grade, the main becomes socializing with peers.