5 main causes of hatred and how to deal with it

The causes of hate

1. Hatred in response to hatred

Usually we do not like people who do not like us. The more it seems to us, they hate us, the more we hate them in return.

2. Competition

When we compete for something, our mistakes can benefit competitors. In such cases, to maintain self-esteem, we shift the blame on others. We begin to blame their failures (real and imaginary) of those who are doing better. Gradually our disappointment can turn into hatred.

3. Us and them

ability to distinguish friends from enemies it has always been vital to the security and survival. Our thought processes evolved to quickly detect potential dangers and appropriately respond to it. Therefore, we are constantly making information about others in their own "Guide", where all our views about different people and even entire classes of people.

Usually we attribute everything to one of two categories: right or wrong, good or bad. And since most of us are nothing special, even minor, superficial differences, as, for example, race or religious beliefs can be an important source identification. After all, we, first of all, always strive to belong to a group.

Considering himself a part of a particular group, which, in our opinion, superior to others, we are less disposed to sympathize with the representatives of other groups.

4. From compassion to hatred

We consider ourselves to be responsive, responsive and friendly. Then why do we still feel hatred?

The fact that we have a clearly established opinion about themselves and they are right. And if we can not reach a compromise, we blame, of course, the other side. Our inability to fully assess the situation, and the fact that we always justify themselves, lead to the conclusion that the problem is not in us, but in the surrounding. Such a view is often incites hatred.

Moreover, in such situations, we usually think of themselves as victims. And those who violate our rights or limit our freedom, offenders seem to us deserving of punishment.

5. The influence of prejudices

Prejudice may have different influence our judgments and decisions. Here are a few examples.

Ignoring the other virtues

Unambiguous situations do not happen. All have their advantages and disadvantages. But when we are in the grip of hatred, our perception It is distorted to such an extent that we did not see any of the opponent's positive qualities. So we formed the wrong impression about the person, which is then quite difficult to change.

Hatred of Association

According to this principle, the nature of the news affects our perception of the person who reported it. The worse the accident, the worse it seems to us, and everything connected with it. That is why we blame the messenger, even if it has nothing to do with the events.

distortion of facts

Under the influence of prejudice, based on the likes and dislikes, we usually fill gaps in information about any event or person, based not on specific data, on their own assumptions.

desire to please

All of us in varying degrees of value the opinions of others. Few people want to be hated. Public approval of a significant effect on our behavior. Remember the words of the French writer and philosopher La Rochefoucauld: "We are conscious pleasure in the little flaws, as though to say that the more important we do not have."

How does hatred

Physical and mental pain - a very effective stimulus. We do not want to suffer, therefore, strive to either avoid or destroy the enemy. In other words, hatred - it is a defense mechanism against pain.

Hate can find different expressions. The most obvious of them - the war.

In addition, it manifests itself in politics. Think of such eternal confrontation: the left and right, nationalists and communists, libertarians and authoritarians.

How to get rid of hatred

• First, with the help of extended close contact with people. Particularly effective joint work, when you work together to achieve a common goal or united against a common enemy.
• Secondly, thanks to equal status in all aspects (education, income, right), which will act not only on paper.
• And finally, the most obvious - we must be aware of their own feelings and try not to dismiss the feelings of others. When you are overwhelmed by strong emotions, better to just step aside, take a deep breath and try to get rid of their prejudices.