7 major mistakes that prevent us from developing the habit
A Life / / December 19, 2019
Andrew Yakomaskin
Teacher and writer. Divided in their inspiring stories group in the social network "VKontakte".
All of our lives - a set of habits. Since dentifrice and ending communication manners. We're just doing a set of actions that are appropriate in a given situation.
It often happens that people want to change their habits: start to eat right, exercise, quit smoking. Unfortunately, this is not all succeed. And if it fails, it is not always immediately and not always so, as we initially.
Over the past couple of years, I have acquired several stable habits: started training, to meditate, to read regularly. But there were those who I give up halfway. So I want to share the mistakes that I have allowed and which, I believe, are common to most of us.
1. We do not understand why we need it
A common cause of unsuccessful attempts to secure the habits that people do not understand why they need it. That is not quite do not understand. Rather, just give in momentary impulse, rather than make an informed decision. heard fluent
English speech friend and also decided to learn the language. I saw the familiar zapostila photos from the gym, and have been slow to buy a subscription or download a diet program.But as practice shows, the reasons for the weak give birth to weak motivation. A couple of years ago, I wanted to learn to play guitar, was very keen on a popular guitarist. I was enthusiastic, learned music, a few chords, but a month later, when the time of regular practice, quit because became interested in other music.
If you have a desire to start a new habit, answer yourself to begin with a few questions:
- The development of this habit will bring me lasting pleasure? It is important to me in a year, two, five years?
- I am willing to sacrifice time, which is now dedicate other cases to develop this habit?
- I am ready to change your lifestyle in order to maintain this habit?
The last question implies that with this habit you may have, will gain a few others that will affect your life. For example, to join the healthy eatingYou learn how to cook, and maybe more, and decide to do exercises or meditation.
The answers to all these questions and allow you to understand why you need it and whether it is necessary.
Do not waste your time on something that does not bring you pleasure for the sake of what you are not willing to change their lifestyle. Otherwise, the force of attraction will always return you to a more comfortable environment.
2. We want everything at once
This error does not occur less frequently. People who still have determined what they need to develop the habit or get rid of it, try to change everything at once. If you have decided to live a healthy lifestyle, then go directly to the yogurt with buckwheat, if you want read moreThen from 100 pages per day.
They do not consider that their old habits formed over the years, and to change them in a single day will not work. As with any skill, the acquisition of habits requires experience.
If you've ever trained after a long break, we should remember the next day sore muscles. This is because they need a period of adaptation. He needs and habits.
When I decided to lose weight, then I began to focus on them when choosing a product glycemic index. Without going into detail, the lower the index of the product, the longer satiety after eating. I read that side dishes from the lowest index in the buckwheat, and began to eat it every day. Of course, in two weeks it has become unbearable.
Then I read about other useful alternatives and made a menu that alternate side dishes with different glycemic index, high and low. After a couple of months, I completely rule out the most "harmful" products and become useful only to alternate red and brown rice, buckwheat, pasta from durum wheat, and so on. So entrenched habit.
"Crush" the habit, and select the one of its components, which can comfortably adhere to today. Healthy eating can begin with an apple or a glass of water before eating. Even if you do not go on, and this small step in the long term will give tangible results.
3. We expect rapid results
You know how long formed the habit? Some may have heard that it takes 21 days or 30 days, and someone may mention the theory of 90 days.
But whatever may be the correct answer (if it is), it will not mean that in three weeks or three months, the force of inertia will push you out of the bed and the body itself begins to wind circles around the house.
Do not expect quick results. In general, do not expect results, time-bound. This kills initiative.
The only deadline that matters - it is today. And if you do not follow the habit of every "today", it does not matter how many days was the "before" and what is "after."
This item is related to the previous one. You can put a big goal - grow thin in the three months to 15 kg in order to prepare for the big event. And to achieve it! But this is not in the habit, and a single leap. Once the event is to be held, you will return to the former way of life.
Get used to the following thought: choosing a habit, you choose it forever. In 30 days, but for a lifetime. If you are not afraid of this statement, it means that you are on the right track. However, it is important to consider the following error.
4. We do not consider possible obstacles
Yes, the habit should be part of your lifestyle. But that does not mean you have to live according to the routine of army barracks. We are people, we have our own desires, and around us, unpredictable world, which at any moment can throw podlyanku.
I do not eat carbs after eight in the evening, and limit yourself to sourBut if I really want to eat a muffin, then indulge. The nutrition is the concept of "chitmil" - the planned breach of the diet. It is necessary for psychological relief.
In this context, I really like this statement of the Dalai Lama:
Monastic rules prohibit the use of food after 12 pm. But sometimes I feel hungry in the evening, especially after numerous meetings, and I want to eat the cookies. Then I ask myself: what the Buddha wants right now - the Dalai Lama following the rules, or to his heart was the joy? And I eat cookies.
Do not forget that following the habit should be fun. And if at some point you find it difficult, do not force yourself. Anyone can be tired. Give yourself time to rest. However, if it is repeated regularly, it is worth considering. Can you choose a habit that you do not need?
5. We do not use triggers
Each habit of working on such a cycle: Trigger → action → prize. Trigger in psychology called trigger habits. It can be an action, object or any other object of attention which indicates that you need to perform an action.
For example, if you are trying to weaken the sweet tooth, your trigger are foods that contain sugar. The more of them are in your field of view, the higher the probability that you will frustrate.
Work with triggers - is to work with signals. You can use them to get rid of habits or acquire new ones.
For example, every morning I put to prepare oatmeal for 14 minutes. This procedure is a trigger for me: during this time I have time to wash and meditate for seven minutes. Simple procedure will not let me forget that I have to do.
Think about what triggers can help you not to forget about their habit. Or, conversely, how to remove from its field of attention reminder harmful. The better you control the trigger, the better you control the habit.
6. We act haphazardly
I have a few regular habits. I meditate, do sports, read. To keep track of the result, I am a simple accounting: the executed action, put a tick.
At first I had a table to Excel, now I use the app Loop. Just do not forget about the item number 4: systematic need to keep track of the result, but it should be without fanaticism. I have my days when I do not want to read or skip the workout. This is normal. The main thing - to maintain 80% of the performance during the month.
For many habits have special tracking system. For example, apps to account for calories or exercise diaries. More Aristotle said: "You - what you do on a regular basis." The system will help not to forget about these actions.
7. We do not learn the habit
I tried several times to develop a stable habit to eat and spend time sports loads. But the results have lasted from a few weeks to a couple months. The first long-term results I got from studying habits. At first I just started eating more low-fat cheese and less simple carbohydrates. I'm not really thought about, when to eat and how much. As a result of habit and not fixed.
The next time I started with learning the basics: micro- and macronutrients, the splitting process carbohydrates and so on. I did not have osilivat complex medical books, it was enough common, but the latest information on the key concepts of sport and nutrition.
Yes, it sounds still sadly. Just sadly, as the study notes during the development of the game on a musical instrument. But this is a necessary step if you want to have not just a temporary fad, and long term habit. The study habits binds you to the process brings with it and make it more enjoyable, because you know exactly how it works.
Think about what you need to be sure to find out about their habit. And even better - ask the expert. Knowledge - is the force that makes our habits a part of us.
Many do not realize that a simple way of making life more difficult. Quick result implies too many "buts". A difficulty is actually life easier, because the nature and form skillsWho will support you always.
I am sure that in the future I want to develop many other habits, and I know that not everyone will give me easy. errors described are typical, and should try to make them not. In the end, everything depends on the fact how much your desire to act. The rest - a matter of time.
As the Italians say, the habit - it first web, and only then the ropes.
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