10 phrases that are in any case we can not say to your child

There are words that should speak whenever there is a reason for this. Such, for example, words of encouragement, praise and sympathy. There are words that must be used with caution, for example, words of condemnation. And there are phrases that you can not pronounce ever. About them today and we'll talk.

Do not be silly!

Synonyms"Do not Bring nonsense", "Enough nonsense chatter."

Why not. Children, unlike adults, They never say "nonsense". All you have decided to tell the little man, it is important for him, no matter how ridiculous or absurd it may seem to you. Such phrases, you give your child understand that his words are not important to you. Do not be surprised then that the children of so early there were secrets.

in return. Rather than shy away from the child, listen to him. If a kid tells about some his discovery, rejoice with him. If the problem - try to find a solution.

On, take it, just leave me alone.

Synonyms"Keep up and leave me alone", "Take it and do not bother me any more."

Why not

. The worst way to yield to the requirements of the child. Not only do you give him a tip, so instead he is also a should disappear from your life. Children very quickly begin to enjoy the ability to get what you want that way. And parents then wonder: where did the alienation?

in return. No one can deny your child all the time, and it is not required. Even if you just get rid of the word "leave me alone", it will be much better.

You can not, give me a better me.

Synonyms"You will not work", "left alone, still can not."

Why not. Denying even the right to try, you will inspire your child a sense of helplessness and doom it to failure. The result is called in psychology "learned helplessness" - when the person in advance confident in my inability to do something or change.

in return. If you see that the baby is taken on the task too much for him, the best thing would be to say: "Let me help you." Or let him help you. If this is not possible, for example, a child eager to repair the wiring, explain that it is dangerous.

Other children can, and you do not.

Synonyms: the word "able" can be a lot of options (listen, learn well, coped know something reached).

Why not. Forcing a child feel worse than others, you form an inferiority complex. Some people think that the way the baby motif appears to be better. But even with adults, this tactic does not always work. As for the child - this is a very bad motivator.

in return. Sigmund Freud is credited with saying, "The only people with whom you have to compare yourself - are you in the past. And the only person, it is better that you should be - it's you now. " Freud's authorship is doubtful, but it is the principle that should guide us.

Eyes have seen you are not mine.

Synonyms"Get out of my sight," "See you do not want to."

Why not. These words indicate to the child that neither he nor his parents do not want problems. Sometimes parents are thus trying to avoid the looming conflict, but avoidance will not solve the problem, but only aggravate it.

in return. You need to listen to children, to help them. In conflict situations, which are inevitable, use other methods.

* Swearing *

Synonyms: They know everything.

Why not. We will not open a discussion on the admissibility (required value) of the mat in the speech. You do not demonstrate your child intimate places? That's all.

in return. In 99% of cases, these words easily replace decent analogues or simply deleted from the speech.

If not for you, then ...

Synonyms"Why did I gave birth to you", "It is better to have an abortion done."

Why not. Similar phrases formed a guilt complex. The child learns that by its very existence makes parents badly hurt. This is a very traumatic experience for the child's mind.

in return. Such thoughts - an occasion to understand themselves. You blame the baby for their own failures and insolvency. Think of it as follows.

You are bad!

Synonyms"You are evil," "You're stupid," "You're naughty."

Why not. Children are estimated to trust the parents. Giving similar characteristics, be prepared that your child learns them and will meet them. This means low self-esteem and possible problems in the future.

in return. Instead of "you're bad" - "you're not done." Not "you stupid," and "this is the wrong decision." Not appreciating the child, and actions, you give him the opportunity and incentive to become better.

I do not love you!

Synonyms"If you do something or not do it, I will not love you."

Why not. Parental love should be unconditional. The threat of losing its equivalent threat to life. In the end, it is you really do not love your child? Then why tell him this terrible lie?

in return. The same is applicable to the next step.

I'll give up.

Synonyms"I'll leave here", "I'll give my uncle."

Why not. Parents - the most important people for a child. Depends on them his life, the child can not imagine their existence without a mother. Therefore, these phrases are so effective... at first. Any bluster child very quickly ceases to perceive. But to form a neurosis, it is time enough.

in return. Anything. Seriously. Even the threat of physical punishment - usually a lousy method of education - better than the threat to quit or stop loving. But it is even better to build a relationship with the child, is not based on fear and punishment. The point is not easy, but the result is worth it.

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As you have seen, is not words, as such, is the attitude of parents to the child, which is behind these words. And more importantly the behavior of mothers and fathers. Therefore, little to abandon bad words, we must abandon the bad things.