What if the child does not want to go to clubs

It is believed that the earlier and denser we loaded the child different knowledge and skills, the better it will grow. Children themselves rarely obediently follow our plans. In this article, we try to figure out who is right and what to do.

So, you are determined to raise a child properly and immediately want to sculpt out of it physically developed, disciplined nuclear physicist, who knows how to stand up for themselves, outgoing and not shy of musical improvisation piano. Write it on a suitable goal circles, preferably two years, because - as you probably know - there is no limit children's opportunities brain and body as a whole. The only problem on the way to your dream becomes unbearable whining baby. Because your best creation turned out to be extremely lazy and stubborn. What can you do in this situation? Look out with your child!

Just agree that the author of this article does not consider the problem:

1. If the child is stubborn and capricious under three years. It is normal that at this age the baby is afraid to be without a mother or tired very quickly from classes. Your child will not lose anything if they ignore (you may lose 40 minutes of respite). All children are different, if your girlfriend with your active child has time for a week to run around all the early development of the group in the area, do not think that is the norm, and you should follow them. While there may well consider your attempts to socialization as the beginning of a difficult way of walking mugs.
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2. If your child will enjoy visiting at least one section of the two or three times a week after school or kindergarten, but is opposed to the visit of the second, third, fifth. You're in luck: the child found what he is interested. Maybe it's better to leave it alone?

Questions helpers

However, if you are sure to lower all the brakes can not be, for a start, ask yourself a few questions about the lessons, which are having trouble, and did their best to answer them honestly. So it will be much easier to find a way out of the situation with the child.

1. As far as these activities are necessary? TO foreign language It can be viewed as a useful electives, but can be as a mandatory educational minimum. Can you give up these activities? Should I fight for them?
2. Do you have the desire and ability of the child to the activities proposed in this section? Is active and whether it is mobile for sports clubs, whether musical, showing an interest in technology or mathematics?
3. What is the purpose of pursuing you personally? How do you see the future of the child? Will your little girl a professional dancer or you just want to keep it stood at stenochki at the club?
4. Is it possible to realize your goals and talents of the child through other activities? Physical development - is equally a struggle, and swimming, and gymnastics, and dancing. Musicality child may be an indication and dancing, and singing, and playing musical instruments. And even a musical instrument, you can change several times in search of vocations.

search for causes

Possible causes of the vagaries of the attitude of the child very much depend on the age and temperament. With students try to talk without much emotion. Think of yourself at the same age: are you then to much treated differently. The child is three or four years can not even explain to you what irritates him. The phrase "I do not want to go there!" Babies covers all the trouble immediately, try to find the cause of elimination whim.

1. Long tiring road. Children are impatient. And the smaller they are, the less they have patience. Try to reduce road transport use. Walk on the road to school - this is not the best option. The child somehow knows that will now occupy a very specific activity, and already preparing internally, and constant monitoring of the time is not conducive to relaxation. If possible, it would be better to walk after visiting the circle, on the way home, and eroding vygulivaya fatigue and emotion.
2. No contact with the teacher. This is a question which, of course, it would be better to find out immediately. It makes no sense to give a child, especially the preschool, the teacher, who can not find him approach. Observe what mood the child goes from the very first sessions. For younger preschoolers, perhaps it is better to look for another teacher. Even if you had a hard hit in the sports club. At this age, most importantly - start doing exactly where - it is not so important. Students are not so picky, but would be better if teacher - a man carried away by his subject. Indifferent to us sufficiently in schools. Here you can do little: the soft persuasive conversation, waiting for the moment when the group will be friends.
3. Too high a load for a child. In an effort to give all the best you recorded it in a sports club, which produces the Olympic Champions, although your child with the goals were very modest: good posture, physical endurance. Yield obvious - change to a similar section but with less congestion.
4. The lack of friends for extra lessons. Perhaps your child at all no friends. Try to find out with whom he communicates what kind of relationship with the children in the group. If the circles at least occasionally arrange holidays informal meetings, try to visit them. New Year tea party before March 8, reportable presentations from senior groups, exhibitions of works - all this is a great way to socialize with children of their group in the free atmosphere.
5. Big gap between groups. Sometimes one or two missed classes due to illness can greatly affect the child's academic performance. Explain that these are temporary difficulties, it happens to everyone, you need a bit of patience and perseverance. If possible, consult with the teacher about how best to bridge this gap.
6. The child does not see the ultimate goal. Even if you are confident that he needed just dancing, no dancing class will not give the child free unlimited possibilities of dance throughout the session. It is unlikely that by choosing this path, he imagined the endless repetition of the same element or hours spent in stretching. Try to attend performances and exhibitions reportable senior groups, look for motivational movies, talk with your child about what is not caught and fish from the pond without a certain difficulty.
7. Error in planning the day before class. Too much congestion at the school on the day of additional training; no time have a snack or comfortable with change; two classes in different circles are held in one day, and your girl with disheveled head and a wet bathing suit in the bag goes into English, where he will meet with the boy she likes. Think about how smooth these unpleasant moments, specific advice here can not be, every situation is individual.
8. The child learned all he wanted to, and willing to try something new. It's not necessary to put spokes in the wheel, you will always have time to go back. It does not forgive inaction only professional sport, but do not throw the sport, in principle, try a new direction. Even if you yourself have been in a similar situation and still regret that your parents at the time did not insist on continuing training, will be much more useful for you to do your missed opportunities than trying to impose their to kid. Perhaps you will understand that late start is not so scary.

Tips for All Seasons

General advice, perhaps, are universal for any trouble with the child.

1. You can still, if you do not try to do everything at once. A sober assessment of their moral and financial opportunities. Circles - is not only a waste of consumables and equipment, but also for holidays, outings, birthdays, new friends and teachers. Leave some free time for leisure and slothThat in the event of unforeseen circumstances do not have to painfully make up for lost once in five sections.
2. Do not promise what you do not intend to or can not perform. Promised gift - good enough to buy. Also, it does not need an empty threat, although it would be better never to threaten, or clubs will be associated with punishment. Reward for success in the classroom, rather than the fact of their visit. So a child soon formed a desire to grow.
3. Observe mode! From the very first days of life the child mode - your best friend. Yes, sometimes you become hostage to it, but in most cases much easier to cope with sleep, satiated and calm person, no matter how old he was.
4. Let your child make mistakes. Each of us has a story about how parents just do not insisted on the continuation of occupation and lost your rare talent, or about how 10 years of music school were a real hard labor and after the exams you've never touched instrument. You can not guess exactly how this story will end. Try to help your child cope with laziness and failures, but does not decide everything for him.