How to stop shy of everyone and everything: 10 effective methods
Educational Program A Life / / December 19, 2019
Modesty is not a vice, but excessive shyness may prevent and personal life, and career. Layfhaker assembled specific and really work the way that will help finally get out of the cocoon and begin to communicate normally with people.
1. Make a list of problematic situations
Begin to solve the problem better analysis. So do not be lazy to remember and write down all the situations in which you feel tightness. Be very specific. Instead of "talking to people" enter, about which people in question: for strangers of the opposite sex or of those who have power.
When you have a problem is decomposed into parts, it already seems more decisive.
Then, try to arrange the recorded situation in order to increase your anxiety (most likely call a stranger causes less anxiety than the performance in front of an audience).
In the future, this list can be used as a plan to combat shyness. Starting small, you will overcome the increasingly difficult situation for you. And with each new victory of a sense of confidence will grow, and shyness, respectively, decrease.
2. Secure your strengths
Another list that will help you in the battle against oppression, should touch your positive qualities. Usually, the cause of shyness - in low self-esteem. Mercilessly fight with her, reminding himself of his own glory (it is not a joke).
Try to find a downside even disadvantages. Perhaps you find it hard to lead a long monologue, but you are an excellent listener. This communication skills, too, can and should be used.
3. Decide on the purpose of
Any action becomes much more effective when it is targeted. It is clear that the constant embarrassment prevents to live, but it is necessary to explain to myself what exactly it hinders you. It is not excluded that the stated purpose will be the impetus to overcome the age-old problem.
Despite the fact that I speak, write and am radio show, in my heart I'm an introvert. But as the head of the company, I had to talk about our products and services. This required me to get out of my shell and donos message to the world. I have overcome shyness, he realized that only I can provide the correct flow of your message. After realizing this fact, I have taken steps to make it easier for themselves public speaking and meeting new people.
Holtsklou Eric (Eric Holtzclaw)
The skills needed to hone and let live habits - systematically eradicated. All this applies to the sociability and shyness. Here are a few ideas that can be used as a kind of training.
- Reprogram yourself. Imagine your shyness - a program in the brain, which is triggered in response to certain situations, and you, as a user of the computer, the power to influence the process. Try to reverse and take actions contrary to those you are accustomed to. I would like to hide in a corner at a party? Go in the thick of things. Caught myself thinking that the conversation takes a position on the defensive? Try to ask the other party a few questions.
- Talk to strangers. Try at least once a day to speak with one unknown person (preferably with random passers-by). Chances are you never will not see it, so feel free to hone in on him communication skills.
- Generally longer communicate. Try to use every opportunity to come into contact with people. Tell jokes, agree on performance and greet those whom you meet often, but never greet.
- Warms up before an important talk. Do you want to speak to any specific person at the party, but are afraid to approach him? Practice on the present, which cause less embarrassment. When it comes to familiarity, try to tell them the things that are planning to speak to the right person. After this rehearsal will be easier to talk.
- And always be prepared for public speaking. But are not limited merely a repetition of the question. Visualize your future success with the audience. This will give confidence.
5. Focus on other
The problem of shy people is that they think too much about yourself and the impression that will make on others. Try to redirect the flow of thoughts from himself to others. Be interested, ask empathize. When you concentrate on the other person, anxiety about their own behavior goes by the wayside.
6. try new
Get out of your comfort zone. Firstly, this move a positive impact on your self-esteem, and secondly, the diversity of your life. You can enroll in the sports section or art courses. Another great option - master classes in improvisation. These classes help to be liberated.
7. Watch for body language
Eye contact, correct posture, loud and a clear voice and a smile and a firm handshake inform others about your confidence and openness. Moreover, these signals you are a bit deceiving your brain and really start to feel more free.
8. Rarely say "no"
ABOUT the importance of the word "no" Much has been said. But the shy people, on the contrary, it should be avoided. Their failure (expressed as word and action) is often dictated by the fear of the unknown and unreasonable fear shame. If you wish to cease to be ashamed of, learn to say "yes" to the opportunities that life presents.
9. Learn to manage anxiety
Some physiological responses associated with shyness, to overcome very difficult. Someone begins to stutter, someone - roughly blush or forget the simplest words. Stop it by willpower alone is almost impossible. Help cope with the problem of the ability to quickly relax, for example, by using deep breathing.
Here are some articles that raise your anxiety management skills to the next level:
- How to overcome stress and calm down.
- VIDEO: 3 ways to calm down when everything infuriates.
- How to beat anxiety, when you can not "just calm down".
10. Do not advertise your shyness
It is not necessary to concentrate his and other people's attention to the fact that you have a problem with communication. So you are to hang the label and unconsciously strengthen your installation that shyness - your constant feature.
Even if others notice your shyness, pretend it was an accident, speak about it lightly, and not as a serious problem. You begin to blush? Say that this is a feature of your body, rather than a reaction to stress. And never describes himself in front of strangers as a shy person. Let them make their own opinion and to notice other, more interesting your features.
Do you know other ways to stop shy? Talk about them in the comments.