How not to let fear stop you from success to achieve their goals

Sometimes we become for themselves the worst enemies. Fear of success makes us sabotage their own work and miss the rare opportunity. Layfhaker will help you understand whether you have this fear, and tame it.

What do you fear most? When answering this question, you are unlikely to come to mind is the fear of success. And it is in vain, because in fact many of us are afraid not tolerate failure, and it is to succeed in any case. And one by one to lose a chance to change their lives for the better.

If you think that this is not about you, do not jump to conclusions.

Symptoms of fear of success

Unlike many other phobias, we are rarely aware of the fear of success. This is something and his craftiness.

If you fit most of the statements below, the cause of your failure is in the fear of success.

• You are not constantly finish up.
• You talk a lot about what are going to do, but do not proceed to action.
• You are working on several projects at once, not concentrating properly on any of them.
• In your list of New Year's resolutions year after year all the same items.
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• You often engaged in self-criticism.
• Distraction and procrastination - your best friends.
• You do not really like your work.
• In situations where you are about to achieve success, something always goes wrong.
• You feel guilty for any, even the smallest of their achievements, if your friends, family or colleagues have not reached the same.
• You do not talk about their successes.

Therapist, coach and author of the popular blog about the work of Mark McGuinness (Mark McGuinness) identifies three main types of fear of success. Depending on with which one you're facing, you can choose a strategy of action that will help to overcome this fear.

Species of fear of success

1. Fear not cope with success

As the best-selling author Hugh MacLeodSuccess is more complex than failure. And achieve success more difficult than to fail. To some extent, we are more comfortable to stay in not the most pleasant but familiar environment. Success - so go stride. On it you are waiting for attention and criticism from others, more pressure and more responsibility. And some little (or very) disturbing part of you obviously would prefer not to risk.

How to overcome it

A man who pursues this fear, focuses more on his experiences, fear of responsibility and less - on the possibility of success. His task - to correctly place the goal, to gain access to internal resources and believe in themselves.

Olga Bezborodov, a practicing psychologist, systemic therapist, expert "advice Center and system solutions"

Remember: It's not so bad in reality as you suggest your negative fantasies. If you have the strength to survive the hard times, with success, you also manage. Yes, you will have to change, to learn new things. Just remember: you are quite flexible and creative in order to do so. And if you are still in doubt, remind yourself of the additional resources that will bring you success:

• you will become more confident;
• you will gain useful contacts;
• you will earn more money;
• you build up a good reputation, which will open up new doors and new.

2. Fear of becoming worse

He is well acquainted representatives of creative professions. It is about them often say: "scribbled", "burned out", "it is not the same." No one wants to achieve success at this price. However, if your achievements will see the general public, someone will surely tell you about unpleasant things. Including - you "is not the same."

How to overcome it

• First, accept the fact that you can not please everyone at once. None of the successful people did not escape the evil tongues.
• Second, you have to do to understand clearly what you want from him in terms of work. Make for yourself a list of symptoms that tell you that you have "burned out." And let it always be at your fingertips. If you start to doubt, just look at it and see whether you have deviated from the right path. Let a guide for you to be your own ideas, and not someone else's speculation.

Your endeavors - it is only up to you. How do others know how to make it better? Constantly looking at other people's opinion, you will not only deviate from the chosen path, but get lost at all. Own point of view and a line of conduct - are the main landmarks on the approaches to success.

Olga Bezborodova

3. The fear of losing yourself

Unlike the previous fear, this applies not your job, and your personality. If you feel it, you experience that Alter and your family and friends do not recognize and accept the new you. Yes, this fear has some justification. You can really become conceited. Or your loved ones simply will envy you. Unfortunately, it happens.

But it all depends on you. In the end, if you all a happy, then why change? In addition, the change - not to magically turn into a completely different person. This is a much more complicated process. Change can only enrich your personality.

Any new experience changes us. We always go to a certain risk that what suited us before may no longer hold today. Change, life experience - is the price of our growing up.

Olga Bezborodova

How to overcome it

Think of the changes in themselves as pumping his character. You are evolving, now you can give more to the world. In addition, you can try yourself in unfamiliar roles for you - and they do not necessarily have to be negative.

When the wind changed course, someone builds a wall, and someone - windmills.

Chinese proverb

At the same time, no one bothers you stay the nicest guy you used to see how close people. Spend more time with them, and you'll feel as if shooting a fancy new outfit and put on an old pair of jeans. It's all the same you, just another "suit". And remember: the more you have of "suits", the richer your life and greater opportunities.

That's not too much of psychoanalysis can be overcome inner strength that makes you give up all the good that happens in your life. Do you know other recipes that help to cope with the fear of success? Share them in the comments.