, Start differently about it to change their lives to tell

Imagine that at the age of 12 years you and your family moved to another city. You went to a new school, and there you were first teased. How would you describe this period of life now? As one of the many occasions when it all went wrong? Or how difficult times, which resulted in a well? It appears, from this much depends.

In 1950 in the UK and US television was a very popular program This Is Your Life ( «This is your life"). It tells the guests leading his biography, looking at the red book, which was written the date, key events and memories collected in advance creators transmission. Each of us in the mind there is a red book of his own life. And often, we fill it, without even noticing it.

Personal narratives (stories about himself), there whether we pay attention to them or not. They give meaning to our existence, and form the basis of identity.

Your story - it's you.

writesThe empirical structure of narrative identity: The initial Big Three psychologist Kate McLean (Kate McLean), «the stories that we tell about ourselves open, create and sustain us through life." In her works she explores the fascinating idea that these personal narratives, even though we are constantly changing and their supplement, contain stable elements that reveal our inner essence - fundamental aspects of our personality.

One of McLean colleagues, a pioneer in the field of personality psychology, Dan McAdams (Dan McAdams), wroteThe Psychology of Life Stories this almost 20 years ago. According to him, people differ from each other not only features characterBut also in how they build their narratives.

These personal stories there are key aspectsThe Incremental Validity of Narrative Identity in Predicting Well-BeingDifferences that define and every one of us: agent-based, community, valence, positive and negative smysloobrazovanie both. To identify the most important ones, McLean and colleagues conducted several studiesThe empirical structure of narrative identity: The initial Big ThreeBy employing about 1 000 participants.

They covered a certain episode from their lives or tell a coherent story, summarizing their lives. After careful analysis, researchers came to the conclusion that there are three main aspects that characterize the personal narrative of each man.

1. Motivational and emotional themes. This aspect reflects the independence of the narrator and his connectedness with others, as well as the extent to which the whole history of its positive or negative.
2. Autobiographical reasoning. Show how we think about the events of his narrative, we find it reasonable for what happened and notice whether the communication between the key events and how we have changed.
3. Structure. This connectivity history in terms of dates, facts and context, which remains stableConsistency and stability of narrative coherence: An examination of personal narrative as a domain of adult personality During a long time.

But the personal narrative - not just what we say to others. it affectsNarrative identity and eudaimonic well-being on our mental health and general well-being. People who are more likely to tell positive stories ( "I lost my job, but moved to another realm, and what I do now, I like a lot more," "My I teased in the new school, but there I met with my best friend ") are generally more satisfied with their life in general, and less likely to suffer from mental problems health.

The same applies to people who feel an active participant in its history, as well as to those who show a greater sense of community with others. For example, often includes episodes of their stories with family and friends or joint interests.

Naturally, the question arises: is it possible to change themselves and their lives, changing the personal narrative? It is based on this narrative therapy, which helps people to rethink their personal stories in a more positive way. Remember that the same red book in your head - it's a draft, not a final version.

You can change your story.

The researchers came to this conclusion after spending experimentTelling better stories: Competence-building narrative themes increase adolescent persistence and academic achievement with "redeeming" narratives. They asked the participants to describe a situation where a failure has changed their for the better. Compared with the control group, which did not allow such a task, the subjects felt a more purposeful and test questions answered that they always finish the job. And it lasted even a few weeks later.

"These results not only demonstrate that the personal narrative can be changed, but also suggest that changes in the way people think and talk about the important events of his life, affect their lives in the future, "- the authors write in conclusion.

Philosophers knowingly have always said that we create ourselves and a reality. Usually therapists use this principle to help a person get rid of a certain fear. But this approach can be applied to the whole of life as a whole to become the author of the story you want to write.