8 negative phrases that it is time to stop talking yourself

1. "I'm an idiot"

The third remake an important project? It is impossible to understand what is written in the textbook? We decided to do programming in Python, but my head was spinning from the new information? At such times it is easy to doubt their intellectual abilities and reward myself with some offensive epithets.

But instead of berating yourself, try using more careful phrases. For example, "I have strengths and weaknesses. Programming - is really difficult. We'll have to give it more time and effort. "
Otherwise, you do eventually convince yourself that does not possess the mind - and thus cut your way to the interesting projects and new knowledge.

2. "I am a loser! I do not get "

Usually we say so, when tired, and the world appears in very dark colors. At such moments, only one, the last, the little things, to give up and exclaim: "Well, why do I always have no luck!"

However, it is very general and categorical phrase, and it is usually no significant facts.

Try replacing these expressions in a more neutral option: "Yes, in my life there are ups and downs. But I'm doing as much as I can and as good as I can at the moment. "

3. "I myself am the one to blame"

Sometimes we try to push the responsibility onto others, and sometimes go to the other extreme and start to blame yourself for all of its own, and along with others, trouble. It is not constructive and can permanently ruin the mood and destroy motivation. Try saying: "In fact, what has happened is my role. But I I take responsibility only for their actions and decisions, and not for the whole situation. "

4. "They probably think I'm ..."

Oh, this is our eternal delusion - to consider himself as the center of the universe and think that everyone is very concerned about how we look, what we say and do. All this, of course, comes from the self-doubt that we, in fact, to attribute to others their own thoughts.

That is not your classmates for the reunion think that you are a loser, and you think that of themselves.

And even if some strangers really you are not happy, it does not mean anything. So replace the alarm, "They think I'm a ..." on just such a statement: "They may think that you will, that is their right. But their opinion - only their opinion, for me it does not say anything. "

5. "I am lazy and a procrastinator"

With each case: going to work, I went to the Internet to look for the important information link for the link - and here three hours have passed, and you are reading about plastic surgery Kim Kardashian or watch a documentary about fish-drop.

After that, every fall the guilt: how is it that I had to do something useful, but instead... I'm lazy, dull and passive, I will never make it. Only here from such self-flagellation no one will be better.

That feeling of guilt - is one of the reasons for the protracted procrastination. We are wasting time, then blame yourself for this, and we believe that the day is spoiled and taken over the case is meaningless. Therefore, the non-constructive statements should be replaced with something like "Today, just a day like this, I needed to rest. And I make up for lost time tomorrow. "

6. "I never will not work!"

All, of course, the dream of a light, bright and comfortable future. But believe it is not always easy - especially when piled failure on all sides. The head immediately begin to creep decadent thought, "I will never make it, in no way succeed and die in poverty."

The probability that the way it happens, will be much higher if you continue to blame themselves.

scientists interviewedEffects of Self-Talk Training on Competitive Anxiety, Self-Efficacy, Volitional Skills, and Performance: An Intervention Study with Junior Sub-Elite Athletes 117 athletes, each of whom were given instructions on how to conduct an internal dialogue. Some of the participants were given instructions themselves, not emotionally colored, athletes from the second group tried to motivate yourself. The third group praised itself fourth abused and intimidated. Indicators are not too different from each other, but the athletes of the first three groups still showed a higher sports results and were more confident than those who criticized themselves.

If you really want to despair and posomnevatsya in yourself, you can do it in a more gentle form: "Yes, I know that I can expect failure. But that is no reason not to try. I am in any case bear out the story valuable experience. "

7. "I missed this opportunity! But he could try a little! "

Us sometimes swim impressive earnings, exciting offers and useful contacts. Sometimes we ourselves are to blame, and sometimes because the circumstances are. But before we dive into regret, remember that setbacks happen to absolutely everyone.

For example, not so long ago in social networks it has been popular hashtag # menyanevzyali. Beneath it all sorts of people, even successful and famous, told how failed to enroll in college, admission not work or during important meetings.

Therefore, before sighing about the omissions and torment yourself, try a different way to express this thought: "Here I did not succeed. So I bit the Pohorje, and then analyze their mistakes and will work on them. " And, you can remember what happened in your life because of the "failure". For example, if you have made a dream job, you would not be settled in a small company and met there a half.

8. "They are always all turns out. Not that I have... "

I wonder whether there is in the world a single person, which did not compare with other since childhood?

Petya ate porridge, and you're not. Mary got the top five, and you're three. All your classmates are married and you and you will stay alone.

Of course, we get used to that around all the time there are some Masha and Petit, which a priori better than we do. And persistently we compare ourselves with them, hoping that in anything they do not concede. And, of course, often losing comparison because someone is bound to be greener grass.

Instead of envying others and brutally berate yourself, look at the situation from a different angle: "It is well tried, and that is what he has come. I have a lot to learn from him. " In the world of enough success, money, and love for each of us.