How to meet the boom: the secrets of a strong relationship

Who are the geeks

The word "geek" in the Russian language it was only recently, but already firmly stuck in it. Boom from English geek - nerd, nerd, fan. Not to be confused with NERD (nerd), which simply wearing glasses and can either be a geek or just wear glasses.

The absolute embodiment of the boom - Sheldon from the series "The Big Bang Theory." In real life, geeks still closer to Johnny Galecki: more friendly and a little less boring.

What problems do you encounter

Do not see the obvious

In psychological terms, the boom - schizoid, and it is not a diagnosis but psycho. Often these people think globally, but do not see what is going on right under their noses, and this is something like a man with binoculars. Clever in the complex things, but helpless in the elementary.

Decision

It is necessary to take this feature. Focus on their projects does not mean that the boom is not up to you to do, just now he is thinking in a parallel universe. Agree on a specific time, which he will devote only their work, and that - to communicate with you. Take care of the boom in domestic matters. Do not replace the mother, just be there.

Not confident

Geeks tend not to believe in yourself. But this is largely due to the fact that self-confidence is inversely proportional to education. We geeks this is especially noticeable as the unwillingness to stand compensated protective mechanisms: a penchant for privacy, strict selection of the company.

Decision

Remind the boom of his achievements in work or study. Strongly support his desire to participate in a conference or some kind of round table. Gradually, through experience with like-minded people he comes to the fact that he begins to give lectures and will gain that same confidence.

looks messy

Many geeks dress slovenly, so when you need to find IT specialist personnel officer in the company, it warned that sloppy appearance sysadmin - it's not a reason to refuse him. For geeks is very characteristic of conservatism in dress, which was formed and stuck at the level of 14-15 years.

Decision

Here everything is quite simple. The boom is ready and can vary. Be correct, do not press and offer options.

Sometimes behave tactlessly

Geeks do not do it out of malice, but because they do not understand how can their truth offend another. We geeks are not very developed communication skills. Companies have little, time to communicate, they spend little. Sheldon - a vivid example of how social deprivation boom brings to this inability.

Decision

Indicate if some words have hurt or offend others. We geeks are not very good with empathic communication component, but everything is fine with analytics. Be sure it accurately remember your recommendation if they sounded calm.

Introduce him to your friends. Just let the first meeting will take place not at a noisy party, and in the format of the evening with nastolki or going to the movies. So immediately there will be a common theme of conversation, and your geek organically will join the company of your friends.

horrendously boring

Sometimes the boom excite the smallest details that seem insignificant to others. But without them the picture for him to become non-ideal.

Decision

The decision depends on the situation. When it comes to his personal affairs and space, then let him do what he knows. But his claims about the color tone of chairs in the living room can be challenged, as this is a common area.

What do you have to be ready

Be prepared for a mass of oddities, which will have to accept if you want to live with the boom. As a rule, these harmless oddities. For example, on a shelf at the computer can live 10 Transformers. And the boom it would be perfectly normal. Or it can take a great interest in collecting and collecting Marvel comics on any particular topic.

Geeks devote his hobby a lot of time. Humble.

They are very fond of the game, with tough, with intricate plot and a lot of cards and rules. Favorited geeks - Dungeons & Dragons, «Twilight of Empire", "Arkham Horror" and others. For the mass of the people is very strange occupation - to devote time game, which can last from 8 hours to several days.

Computer games, too, prefer complex. If this is the game about the aircraft, the choice will fall on the boom simulator as close as possible to reality. You will not notice how the computer will acquire the right to manage the pedals, special joysticks, and the boom will enjoy the battle in the air with the other players.

But your geek might be interested in and submarine simulator. Most of the time in the game will not be anything! Geek sitting in a submarine and calculates a line (like everything really!) The movement of torpedoes, taking into account the flow and force the enemy ship's displacement. Then a bullet - and past. And he believes in the new.

Their enthusiasm may be unusual, perhaps a few children or seemingly meaningless.

Try to join the interests of the boom. It is possible that board games like you do. If you realize that you can not with the same enthusiasm to share these hobbies, then arrange a time that he will be given his hobby.

If you decide to make him a gift, especially related to his hobby, it is better to sacrifice surprise and thoroughly consult what he needs.

What can be done with the boom: the shortlist

Geeks are very suggestible, discreet and modest, making them easy bait. Be careful in his criticism, chose his words.

The boom is very patient, can long withstand the psychological pressure, and then turn around and leave. Do not wait nonverbal signalsThat he was something like: they can and not wait.

The emotional life of the boom passes inside, not outside, so it can not always say that it is something concerned.

We should not laugh at his enthusiasm. If you can not separate them, then treat with respect. For him it is a clear marker "- another's." Because geeks complex relationship with society, they are carefully filtered their environment. Fall out of their range of interests can be fairly easy, and they ridicule perceive sharply.

Why be a geek

It all depends on what your expectations from this man. If you learn it, it is predictable, stable and conservative.

You will learn a lot, you may completely unnecessary. Be prepared for the hour and a half lecture, which begins with the words: "There is nothing complicated, I'll explain to you now."

Geeks, tend to be quite sensitive. If not always well understood that the source is experiencing, but are capable of empathy.

Geeks are very attached and faithful. In part because that for them to find a good partner in life - a great success. Finding it once, they will not look for it in the second or third. And life does not involve a wide circle of friends.

You may have to make a little more effort to coerce the boom on any new activities, but this will be compensated, when he will take your hobbies as their own.

Any relationship - a series of compromises. Strong union built on respect for each other's interests and availability agreements in the disputed areas.

From geeks turn out good and reliable partners, which definitely will not be bored. Protect your geek, and he will respond to you in return.