How to learn to speak in public, if you are an introvert

I stand on the stage, looking over the heads of hundreds of people that do not reduce eyes from me - they are waiting for me to start say, say anything - and the inner voice reminds me: "You are wrong to do man".

I opened my performance TEDx conference, and so I had to set the tone for the event. This is a huge responsibility, and in addition, one of the most important speeches in my life. In any other circumstances I would have said my inner voice: "Yes, you're right. I should not be here. I'm an introvert. I am an editor. I can not even in the conversation with his wife to finish a sentence without thinking about what we could say otherwise. "

But, fortunately, I had prepared in advance. I prepared not only speech, but also knew how to cope with such destructive impulses. I knew what to say, I believed in what he was going to say, I had a plan in case the ideal circumstances in which I was prepared to not be so in reality.

Today I can stand on stage in front of thousands of people and talk confidently about what I think. If I'm lucky, a few tricks and a couple of jokes will not entirely a failure. But it was not always so.

When it comes to public speaking, all my confidence - it is the result of tremendous work, frustration, cold sweat and embarrassing situations. But I'm happy with the experience, because thanks to him I'm here - and I can share some of the lessons from both frightened bumbling idiot to turn into a calm, confident speaker.

This is perhaps the most important part of the article for you - just to know that you can learn to speak before an audience. You did not have to be born with such skill.

How to share his idea, not only with a small group of friends, and talk about it with more than a thousand scenes strangers - there are a few lessons (many of them from the speakers far better than me, I should add). These lessons have changed me, turned from a shy, stuttering Rapporteur confident and respectable. I hope they will help you and to convey to others their own ideas.

1. Do not tell me about what you do not understand

Sounds like a useless, obvious advice. This is not true. and so you do everything well - if you follow it perfectly, the remaining paragraphs of this article, you will not really need.

One day, after a few speeches, when you zarekomenduete itself as a good speaker, you will open the opportunity to speak somewhere in faraway places with nice hearing the names. There's a catch - the content. Perhaps you have established yourself as an expert on marriage games canaries, and then get email with an invitation to attend the conference and talk about global trends in sales for Staples securities.

You have to thank for the invitation and politely refuse.

The reason is simple: you do not know what to say about it. Even if you try to collect information in a short time, a good presentation still does not - you are not interested in the topic itself. In fact, you do not want to talk about it and the inviting party is not interested in the fact that you made a good story. They just want you to present at the event, because they saw your video and thought that you are a famous person.

Therefore, this simple advice is hard to follow. You're new, you want to stand out, it seems that this is a great opportunity for you.

If you have ever bought a thing with the hope that it will work, but in reality it does not work (think of advertising the video that encouraged you to ill-considered purchase), then you understand the disappointment that awaits both sides from the beginning.

And do not forget: you do not always get more if you say "yes." If you want to be a world-renowned expert on the clips, then forward. But if you have a message you want to share with the world, stick to it. You can tailor your message to attract a new audience, but will never depart from it.

2. Specify in the script transitions and nothing more

If you're like me, inside you have a strict editor that sits on your shoulder with a red marker in hand and a pair of glasses on his nose, ready to throw casually: "Deuce! And stay after school "- on every sentence that you uttered. No matter what you say, the feeling that you could have said it better, will never let you leave.

at preparation of presentation people like us usually write a script or plan. When writing the script, there is every chance of finding the right wording.

In the words of an ancient Chinese strategist and warrior Sun Tzu: "No plan stands first encounter with the enemy." This is the main problem of the detailed plan. In our case, of course, is no enemy, but there are a world full of uncertainty. One has only to step on the stage, everything becomes really and there is no second take. The more detailed your script, the more likely to spoil everything. When you are new to the world of public speaking, to stand on stage and try to remember what's next - the last thing you need.

So what to do instead? Just improvise? Not really.

While a detailed scenario will bring you more trouble than help, you need a plan of another sort. It is necessary to start from the starting points in your story (you know, there are things that do not get to forget, even if you try hard) and record the time of transition from one thought to another.

Good work personal stories, because:

1. The audience loves them, they help to establish communication.
2. You do not need to write them down, because you and so they remember.

We tell each other stories as long as we are human beings. So we passed the information long before the invention of paper. We are genetically programmed to remember them (so they are easier to present), and, more importantly, the audience is genetically programmed to listen to them (and become happier, listening to stories).

Since the same story can be freely tell each time in different ways, you do not need to write down everything exactly to the last word. Enough of the main points, everything else will take care of your human tendencies. Recorded the main points will help tie the stories together.

3. It practices a little more than you need

My friend Chris Gillibo (Chris Guillebeau), the founder and host of the ceremony The World Domination Summit, in During the year, every weekend does what says at least 10 reports during negotiations. Sometimes he tells the story. On another occasion, it reminds the audience of the 15 important things that were discussed before the break for lunch.

As a participant in WDS and novice speaker, I once asked him: "How do you remember all you need to say, and in full, each? Time go on stage, "I was hoping for a secret life hacking, but his answer - and it's true - was the most common," I have I practice. "

Now I'm doing. And it works. Whenever I have to give a speech, I rehearse at least 2-3 times. It takes time, it is often boring, have to deal with in days or weeks, and you do not want to practice again. But you're not doing it for himself. You do it for your audience. If you want to remember it, you have to immerse themselves in an unattractive, boring, monotonous work.

4. Break down your report into parts

Chris Gillibo advised not only a lot of practice. He also mentioned that he is working on separate parts. He's trying to break my presentation into pieces, and then gathers them together.

Now I do the same, and it reduces the preparation time. Working on the parts, I can develop and make a decision on the presentation of the different passages in parallel. If I stumble on some piece of text in the middle (or, even worse, in the beginning), I did not have to wait perfect working condition without doing anything - I can work on the other parts until utryasu issue with problem.

Quickly finish its report more practice time, as long as it will not enter into a habit. Nothing affects confidence more than a success, and nothing contributes to the success as a constant practice.

Some people have practiced as much as you need. When I say "practice more", I mean that it is necessary to rehearse more than you need.

5. Slow down. slowly down

A common problem for all introverts like me if we started talking, we start to chase the thought from which tried to get rid of. My head - is a generator of ideas, which is constantly moving forward. My mouth is, on the contrary, speaks slowly, trying not to make a mistake.

But at one point you have breaks, and you release all the accumulated thought out. Trying to keep up with your brain - the same as if an ant trying to keep the bull, rushing down the mountainside. But trying to speed up his speech to say everything that is born in your head, resulting in a strictly opposite effect: you start to stutter, lose, repeat. Therefore, even more nervous, and move away from the planned speech.

If your idea is important, it deserves all the time needed to express it. A more useful approach - to think slowly. Not quite slowly, of course, rather more cautious.

This problem occurs due to negligence: you do not communicate ideas to each other, and start jumping from one to another instead. Several jumps out of the way - and you're already struggling to remember where you are.

Be fixed on one thought only. When you notice that your thoughts have taken you far ahead, just go back and repeat the right idea.

6. Do not get lost!

When I was preparing to speak at the TEDx, I called my friend Mike Pachchione (Mike Pacchione), a specialist in public speaking, so he pointed me to the shortcomings. He caught me on the fact that I often deviate from the topic.

This happens when the idea you're talking about, disappearing into nowhere, and you decide to follow her. The problem is that wandering thoughts rarely end on one idea. As only lost once, to continue to sink deeper into the rabbit hole.

The problem is not that you can not tell wondering when wandering, but that should only begin to wander, as you really are lost. As a tourist lost in the woods? He goes one step off the path to look at the plants. And then, "Oh, mushrooms" - and a few more steps to the side. "Hey, that tree in front looks great" - and only when he decides to come back, realizes he has no idea how to do it.

The temptation povitat thoughts may be high, but then it is very difficult to get back on track.

There are two practical ways to solve this problem. The first - to follow the advice number 3 and a lot of practice. The more you practice, the more you their own stories to remember and know where they might lead. Another solution is that the only thing that can help, when you stand on the stage and feel that depart from the topic - is to throw unnecessary thoughts out of my head.

Your brain does not want to follow with abstract ideas, he wants to think about them. The best way to stay on track - to remind yourself that you can think about them... but not right now. Throw them out of your head. Perhaps they can be used during the casting of the same report in the future. But, for God's sake, do not try to use them now.

7. Come up with a soothing ritual

My heart was ready to break through the chest. I felt that all the muscles are tense, and the field of vision begins to narrow. Breathing became more frequent. "What's going on?" - I asked myself. I was on the verge of a panic attack. I had to step on stage to say the most important speech of his life, but the only thing I could think about is that I'm going to send everything to hell. It gave out the stress response, and everything rolled downhill.

Fortunately, I was instructed what to do if this happens. Vanessa Van Edwards (Vanessa Van Edwards), one of the greatest speakers, which I had the pleasure to know, helped me prepare. She shared that she too is nervous before a big presentation. If she said I did not, I would never have thought.

The secret, which she uses? Soothing technique. Every good speaker there is one, and every good, he knows that it is necessary to adhere to show their best side.

What makes Vanessa: it is a quiet place for a few minutes before the scheduled appearance on the stage straightens his back, breathing deeply and is a success.

This may sound a little silly, but it actually works. I myself use this method.

Before an important event for the body is completely normal to begin to allocate a lot of the stress hormone - cortisol. We become especially sensitive to stressful situations. Just a thousand years ago to feel stress and react to it could cost you your life.

Today this does not happen often - I can not remember the reports of "death due to indecision" - but our biology does not keep up with us. The terrible irony is that the more you allow yourself to embrace the stress, the more likely to make mistakes and bad speak.

Therefore, before you go on stage, check yourself and your stress level. Excitement - this is normal. A nervousness - bad. Always reserved for himself a few minutes before going to calm down.

8. When wrong, keep talking

I was a big fan of the TV show "The Colbert Report." I rarely missed even an episode. These were some of the most popular "news" live on television. If you watched the show, you may have noticed that Stephen confused words in almost every episode. He could build a phrase so that it loses its meaning, could miss a word or pronounce it wrong.

But you might not notice it, because apparently Colbert did not respond. When he made a mistake, he did not faltered and did not try to fix it. He just kept talking, because I knew what to remember all introverts speak in public:

context is more important than the details.

He could make a mistake and do not even pay any attention to it. And no one noticed, because nobody listened to every spoken word. Everyone listened context.

Much worse than a small mistake - to attract her attention. If you faltered, use your sense of humor to smooth over the situation. Laugh it off and move on.

9. Remember that the audience wants everything went well

Most likely, the simplest advice that gives everything, helped me learn how to use all the previous tips in action:

Always remember that the audience does not want you to fail.

When you are worried because of the upcoming big event, this simple truth can easily be forgotten. Your audience is not going to drive you off the stage. She wants to find out what you want to teach them. The participants spend their time and possibly money, to listen to you. People do not give their time and money for a bad experience. And just the opposite.

When you are nervous before a performance, it is easy to think: "What if someone does not like what I say "This idea begins to spread, and soon you will start asking yourself:" What if all I have hate? "

This line of thinking leads to poor performances. Do not think so. Do not allow yourself to turn off this road, because in fact, the audience is on your side. She wants to have everything turned out. And, if you follow these nine tips, you will have all the advantages of being at altitude.