The most important thing in a relationship, about which many people do not think

What is the secret of harmonious relationships

If you ask people what is most important in a relationship, you will get a lot of answers. Among them will be trust, respect, communication, and so on. Blogger Chris Gage believes that unites these criteria is one factor - emotional self-sufficiency. Without it is impossible to build a constructive relationship.

Emotional stability - the number one on my list and one of the three things that I definitely want in a partner. Be emotionally stable - the sexiest thing you can do.

Chris Gage, blogger

Author of "The Subtle Art pofigizma" Mark Manson says that people who have this quality, cope well with uncertainty, as well as see their shortcomings and capable of responding to them. Writer and blogger Leo Babauta also used to describe the phenomenon of the term "emotional autonomy".

We are looking for happiness in others, but it is an unreliable source of it. And here's why: it is not the task of others - to satisfy our emotional needs.

Leo Babauta, author, blogger

Blogger, Zaid Dahadzh describes the emotional self-sufficiency as the relationship with yourself: "If you do not love yourself and are not able to meet its own needs, it will be difficult to do the same for others. " Moreover, the term "active maintenance needs" is not intended to appeal to the people to do that for you. We are talking about independent work.

Contrary to popular cliché, in healthy relationships do not have the task to supplement, to complete us, they do not begin with emptiness. They need to build a whole person. And then trust, respect, communication come easily and naturally.

As emotional stability bleed

That is to get you started:

• Look at yourself. Postpone gadgets and other things distracting. Refer to the thoughts, to follow where they arise.
• Begin to solve their problems. If you get bored, find a way to entertain themselves, if painful and lonely - comfort.
• Take over a responsibility. We control only myself and can not influence other people or the environment. Determine what you can actually change, and focus on it.

And what do you think the main thing in a relationship? Share in the comments.