12 of the rules of civilized conversation

This article can not only read, but also listen. If you prefer - turn on a podcast.

Everything listed below as early as 1692 wrote to his children an influential English jurist Matthew Hale (Matthew Hale). Today his words are relevant as ever.

1. Do not lie

Lies - a great crime against humanity. A society without truth - insecure society. Lie hurts the speaker: it is not only a disgrace to him, but also highly addictive, because of which the person becomes more difficult to tell the truth even when he wants to. Over time, he already does not know when lying.

2. Do not talk about that, what do not understand

Stay away from situations where the lie can break out of your mouth by accident. Do not claim that what is not assured. Warn, if that what you say just a guess or opinion.

3. Be terse

In vain do not get stuck. It is better to say little, without depriving themselves of the opportunity to listen to others and absorb their knowledge, wisdom and experience.

4. Be discreet

Do not shout during a heated argument, keep yourself in their hands. Make your opponent's silent not by noise but by using common sense.

5. Do not interrupt

Under no circumstances should not interrupt the person when he speaks. Listen to him. So you will understand it better and will be able to give a coherent answer.

6. Weigh one's words

If you do not think at first silent. Weigh the meaning of what you want to say and decide with the expression with which you want to say it. Reckless people do not think, until you start talking. Or think, but after say.

7. Watch unpleasant people disabilities

If you are in the company of vain and brash people, pay attention to their shortcomings and be careful. So you can avoid their mistakes in a conversation, and behavior in general.

8. Do not praise yourself

Do not brag and do not evaluate himself. If you can only praise your language, it is a sign that your reputation is low and falling rapidly.

9. Do not talk bad about missing

If someone in your circle of friends is not there, try to talk about it only good at every opportunity. Never speak badly about anyone, if he does not deserve it. The exception may be the only situation in which such conversations can help a person to become better or to protect others.

10. Not kidding about the shortcomings

Do not scoff and make fun of natural human shortcomings. This behavior leaves a very bad impression.

11. Be careful with negative comments

Try not to blame anyone, threaten not to utter whose side hateful words. If you had to point out the error, try to do it without reproach to the man was not unpleasant. Otherwise reproach does not help, and the only person upset and possibly configure it against you.

12. Do not be angry

If a person is passionate and says your address is not the most pleasant words, it is better to have pity on him, and do not go into a rage. Silence or very polite response - the best reaction to such behavior. They either soften the culprit hype and make him repent, or will become a punishment for him. In any case, politeness and equanimity keep your nerves and you will create a reputation of a wise and discreet man.