As a simple ability to listen to other people can change your life
Relations / / December 19, 2019
Ability to listen - it's one of the skills that everyone should have. On why this is so important and whether using it to change their lives, learn from this article.
We dream to please everybody. After seeing what we nice person, you can safely write another mental plus in its favor. But if you're not a rock star, do not put the probe on a comet and not acted in the role of a vampire in the popular movie, like the problem is somewhat more complicated.
Learn to listen
In order to please the people, need to be able to do a fairly simple thing - to listen.
Friendship, loyalty, love - these are not empty words, which can be achieved only by starting to listen to the interlocutor. After all, if the world and there is one topic that we like to say, it is ourselves. So why not benefit from it? Your companion will be nice if he could share with you their experiences or concerns. And you, be patient and listen to get in his face a loyal and devoted person. Maybe even a friend.
Listening skills can be learned in the same way as any other skill. The hardest thing here - to recognize their vulnerability. Many of us do not know how to listen to others for this simple reason. It is because of it, we often despise the advice of people. But whose are still tips to listen, if not relatives, parents, friends?
Overcoming his reluctance to be vulnerable and show emotions, you can go to the next step.
Become a good conversationalist
How to become a good conversationalist? Simply - you need to listen, respond and ask questions.
Let's imagine the following situation. You call the school and say that your son got into a fight with his classmate. Stupid template "offense - punishment" immediately slip into the mind of many. Once he got into a fight, he must be punished.
But if instead you try to enter into a situation and talk with your child about what happened?
Asking him questions, getting to know his point of view and genuinely interested in what happened and why, you will strengthen your relationship and become a friend for your child. It costs a lot.
By asking questions and showing interest in the other person, you go to a deeper level of relationship. At this level, where friendship, affection, sympathy and loyalty are already nearby.
Here's another example. Imagine a person, let's call him X. He has a bad life, he wants to jump off a bridge. It stands on the edge, it's left to do is just a step. Here it passes by Z, who realizes that his hand is the life of X, and only he can to dissuade him from this act.
Z X begins to speak about what is illogical jump from a bridge, there are other alternatives. Once again he will be able to rebuild their lives and to live happily. Are the make the Z? Not.
X do not care that it was illogical to jump off a bridge, since X is the most logical solution in the world.
What really had to do Z, so listen to it. He had to ask X, why he is here to try to understand his feelings. Z had to ask why his wife left X, why he was fired from his job, what he felt and how hard he had to. So he would have shown that there are people who are not indifferent to X. And only then to argue, that can make a difference.
People under stress absolutely do not care about your advice. They just need to talk. And you need to learn to listen to them.
Learn to listen. This simple skill can change not only your, but also someone's life. Suddenly, once you find yourself in the place of Z.