3 conversational skills that are necessary to pump

This article can not only read, but also listen. If you prefer - turn on a podcast.

The ability to start a conversation

Start a conversation is difficult because we can not think of an appropriate phrase. All the usual options are sound corny, but the original greeting worse standard. In fact, you need to make one small step: throw doubt come up and say, "Hi!". Nobody wants a magical phrase, all communicate simple and understandable words.

If you do not like a short greeting, here are three good options:

• "Hi! How is the morning? "
• "Hi! It seems we are not familiar. My name is Nastya".
• "Good morning! How are you?"

The value of such phrases starting, of course, not in the original, and versatility. These expressions can use any, they suggest a positive response and help start a conversation.

Skill can be trained. Just find the right person. For example, most bartenders or waiters very sweet fellowship. Of course, this is part of their duties, but that's the beauty. Try to strike up a conversation with these phrases:

• "What you have here is the most delicious" In response, you will most likely hear: "Everything." You have many options to continue the conversation. For example: "No, really, what kind of coffee do you drink when no one is looking?" And then: "Great, I'm happy to try." Or do your usual order and add: "I will try next time."
• Joked. Surprisingly, but the joke does not need to be hilarious. A good joke for a short conversation must be simple, understandable and enjoyable. Nothing offensive or goes beyond the limits of decency. Make a funny remark.
• "I wonder what is the most crazy order you received this week?" Narrowing update query "this week", you will help the other person to respond quickly without thinking. At this stage of the conversation is not necessary and even dangerous to ask deep questions or who make seriously delve into memory.

Of course, to get this conversation is not worth it if you are behind a long queue or you came to the cafe, where a lot of visitors and waiters knocked down. Conversation should be pleasant and relaxed. And be sure to smile.

The ability to join the conversation

A conversation with several interlocutors can become a nightmare. You appear, you can see many strangers, scared and unsociable. It seems that if you now speak, it sounds silly and absurd. Perhaps, in such a situation it is better to remain silent. Why would anyone listen to you?

Use one of the three phrases harvested. The trick is to join the conversation by adding something useful, interesting and informative.

• "I did not mean to eavesdrop, but I can see ..." When you stand close to those who are already talking, obviously, what you hear their conversation. There is nothing wrong to join the conversation and be a breath of fresh air.
• "I'm sorry, I do not quite understand what you mean?" Confessed to his own ignorance, people usually do not like. Use this fact to ask the question that is on everyone's mind, but that no one dares to voice. Curious newbie will not look stupid. But he let the other party feel at ease and explain what is interesting to find out everything.
• "I'm sorry, I've been in this field, but this original opinion is not heard." A compliment can be a reason to continue the conversation if he unbanal and shows your interest in the other person. But duty compliment does not help to break into the conversation, and even hurt.

Join the conversation at any time, especially if your statement will make the conversation more interesting. It can be a comment, correct question or a nice compliment.

The ability to keep the attention of the interlocutor

To keep the attention of the person and the pace of the conversation, you need to remember three things. First, try not to talk too much about yourself. Second, do not ask too many questions the interlocutor: he is not on interrogation. Third, try as much as possible to touch the less personal. It is considered undesirable in business communication.

What kind of questions can be asked? Here are some good examples:

• "Why did you decide to work in the company (sector, industry)?"
• "Surely you have a wealth of experience. What was the most useful to you? "
• "What do you most enjoy in the company (sector, industry)?"

These questions are absolutely harmless. Even better, they're playing on our self-love, because you are actually asking the interlocutor to talk about their career or preferences. You do not push, and offers a pleasant discussion. Few people give up such a conversation.

Of course, you should not only ask questions. Share your opinion, let's detailed answers, open a couple of facts from his biography. You can talk about everything that would be appropriate: the family, hobbies, previous experience, new knowledge.

conclusions

As you can see, to master the basic skills is easy. The main thing - do not give up.

Any conversation can start with the most simple greeting. If you hesitate so easy to talk with a stranger, learn some standard phrases. They will save you if you start to panic and lose your temper.

You can not start a conversation yourself, and join the conversation. Just think that you can add more to the already voiced, and tell this thought aloud. People are sure to appreciate it, and you will easily learn to communicate even with those who see for the first time.