5 reasons for us to be difficult to determine when we are lying
Tips / / December 19, 2019
Some people believe that they can identify a liar at a glance. But actually it is not. Frightening phrases our parents in the style of "I can see right through you!" And piercing eyes, from which I want to sink into the ground or evaporate are more psychological tricks than reality. Under this pressure, we are telling the truth, but more resistant and indifferent and continue to lie. Moreover, even lie detectors do not always cope with this problem and the correct result is more fortunate.
So why are we mistaken? Ronald E. Ridge, PhD and professor of leadership and organizational psychology, thinks he knows 5 reasons why people can not determine when they're lying.
The reasons that we believe liars
The reason №1. We rely on stereotypes
These stereotypes are not always accurate. For example, for some reason, it assumed that the liars are trying not to look into the eyes of the interlocutor when lying. In fact, quite the opposite - liars support long eye contact in order to look more truthful. Similarly, nervous behavior with hand-wringing, sweating or marking time might not be associated with deception and have completely different reasons.
For example, I start to behave in this way if hurrying somewhere and I'm embarrassed to interrupt the interlocutor.
Reason №2. offset trust
Studies have shown that people have a kind of trust mechanism, which by default is programmed to trust most people. Even in those studies in which participants claimed that half of the people lie, they still believe the majority of honest people liars.
Reason №3. Some people just seem to be more honest
Each one of us there is a non-verbal communication style, and sometimes it happens that some people seem to be more honest. This is called "displacement behavior". Those who are more emotionally expressive, talk and move smoothly, seem to be more honest than those who have a more closed appearance and jerky, restless speech.
Reason №4. We do not get a response about our ability to detect liars
The only way to know whether we were able to identify a liar - ask him about it directly. And we do not necessarily get an honest answer. So hone your skills lie detector we are unlikely. Is it just got a job in the investigations department.
Reason №5. Just have a very easy to navigate
The latter and the main reason for which we deduce liar difficult to clean water, is their readiness. If lies rehearsed beforehand, to distinguish it from the truth will be very, very difficult. Deceivers rehearse your answers and watch their nonverbal signals.
And how beautifully they tell! One need only recall Ostap Bender - believe me, in the modern world is full of the same Ostapov. We can determine that we are lying, only in the case when preparing for this in advance and follow all the foregoing. Determine if a lie was as easy as many people think, there would have been defrauded investors, wives and husbands.
So how do you still know when we lie?
How to identify a liar?
Two simple advice: be careful and analyze heard and seen. It is not necessary to be overly suspicious, but also to take anything for granted, too, not worth it. Listen carefully to what you tell us. How believable heard?
There is another little trick! If you ask a liar to tell what happened at the event back to front, ie from the end to the beginning, it will likely or confused in his story will be a big discrepancy with the original version, even if it is well prepared.
And sometimes a sign of falsehood may be long and detailed answers to simple short question. Of course, provided that such a manner of speech is not natural for a human;)