What is “shadow work” and how does it help you understand yourself?

How well do you know yourself? If you've invested time, energy, and money into psychotherapy, meditation, and the like, chances are you're already a pretty mindful person. And you know that the path to self-knowledge is by no means easy. It requires you to seriously delve into the depths of consciousness and sometimes reveals inconvenient truths to you. But if you are ready to go further and explore the dark corners of your personality, shadow work can help you. Just be careful.

What is “shadow work”?

Its essence is to focus attention on those traits of our personality that we are usually shy about and shy away from.

For the first time about the “shadow” side of consciousness spoke Swiss psychiatrist and founder of analytical psychology Carl Jung. He called the shadow the dark part of the personality that we suppress, deny or hold back because We find it unattractive, unacceptable or, in some cases, in conflict with us ourselves.

Even in the safe space of psychotherapy, we sometimes do not want to explore certain aspects of our personality. “Shadow work” is about coming face to face with these hidden or subconscious personality traits and, most importantly, learning to cope with them.

It is important to emphasize that the goal of “shadow work” is not at all to “heal” and overcome one’s dark sides. They are not something bad, but make us who we are. The point is not to get rid of darkness, but to shed light on it.

Why is it useful to do shadow work?

Exploring your dark sides opens up opportunities for self-discovery and personal growth. “Shadow work” is suitable for becoming more aware or changing the approach to certain situations in life. For example, if you are faced with the same problems, constantly find yourself in toxic relationships, tend to suppress your emotions, or struggle to achieve success and happiness but to no avail. Here's what else she can help with.

It improves relationships

When we see and accept our “shadow”, it is more difficult for other people to upset us. It is easier for us to talk about our feelings, we are more tolerant of others. We begin to better understand our needs and desires and learn to express them so that tension and resentment are less likely to leak into our personal or professional relationships.

It increases awareness

When we shed light on the dark side of our personality, we gain a much more complete understanding of ourselves and become more aware of how we interact with other people, why we behave in certain ways, and how we express ourselves myself. We are moving closer to an authentic, more realistic version of ourselves.

It allows you to deal with the past

“Shadow work” helps you come face to face and thus free yourself from the burden of past experiences. Traumas, childhood experiences, or unhealthy relationships have a habit of staying with us for a long time, and we continue to carry this baggage with us day after day. One of the goals of “shadow work” is to shine a light on such problems so that they recede, as often happens with fear of the darkwhen the lamp lights up.

It helps you move forward freely

Have you ever wondered why you get stuck in a vicious circle of self-destruction? Even when we know that certain behavior patterns do not suit us, it can still be difficult to find another way.

Perhaps what forces you to return to the same thing is an outdated “program” that is stuck in your head. “Shadow work” helps you become aware of such attitudes and begin to act differently in order to move on. It encourages transformation and means loving those parts of our personality that are usually difficult to feel affection for.

How to organize it

Shadow work can bring to the surface very strong emotions, hidden triggers and unresolved issues from the past, so it is best done with a psychologist. But even in this case, you need to prepare for the fact that getting to know personality traits that you have avoided for years will be a difficult and emotionally exhausting process.

If you want to try shadow work yourself, there are several ways to make it easier:

• Nurture in yourself self-compassionto look at your “shadow” without fear, criticism and condemnation.
• Develop awareness. The better you understand your internal dialogue - your thoughts, feelings and motives for behavior, the easier it will be for you to work with the dark side of your personality.
• Pay attention to what triggers you and how you react or respond to it to become aware of your self-defense mechanisms. They are created to contain your “shadow”, but they will have to be broken, otherwise the work will not yield results.
• Be open and honest with yourself. Only with complete transparency, when you are truly willing to see the unpleasant traits of your character and behavior, will you be able to accept and let them go.
• Keep a journal and write down all your discoveries about yourself. Our brain tends to forget or block those properties of us that are unpleasant or irritating to us. To overcome this, record any thoughts, feelings, dreams, or images you have.

Despite its extreme benefits, shadow work is not for everyone. Strong emotions can be painful and uncontrollable, so it's best to avoid going into the dark part personality, if you are suffering from recent psychological trauma, you have serious problems with mental health or you have a history of substance abuse.

Finally, before you begin shadow work, make sure you have strong support. You will likely need a strong shoulder to lean on as you go through this difficult process. But as always, the harder you work, the greater the potential reward.