7 books that will help you realize and accept your true desires

To live a full and happy life, it is important to learn to understand your desires. Often people suppress them because of pressure from others, and also out of their own fear. It leads to bitter unfortunately at a later age, when a person realizes that he has missed opportunities. Books from the selection will help you avoid disappointment.

1. “More than desire. Intimate Conversations with a Psychologist, Charlotte Fox Weber

Psychologist Charlotte Fox Weber has been looking for an answer to a personal question for a long time: “What do I want more than anything in the world?” - and then began to ask a similar one to her clients. Working with thousands of different people, she was struck by how difficult, interesting and dangerous to get to the bottom of their deepest desires. But this is the most valuable thing - to get a clear understanding of what we want in order to move forward and feel the opportunities that open up. Charlotte Fox Weber is convinced that becoming aware of our desires brings us back to ourselves, and this is the beginning of growth.

The book contains real cases from psychotherapeutic author's practice. These are the stories of different people at different stages of their lives, whose problems are always connected with their deepest aspirations. Faced with their true desires and inner reality, they begin to work to satisfy their requests. And we have the opportunity to read these stories to understand ourselves a little better.

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2. "The French Art of Living Easily" by Olivier Puriol

This book was born during a conversation between the philosopher Olivier Puriol and his friend Elsa Lafont. They ate dinner, drank wine and tried to talk - they were disturbed by children who ran noisily around the house. Instead of calming them down and calling for order, Olivier and Elsa decided that they didn’t want to strain themselves once again, but would rather drink another glass. Soon the energy of the children ran out and they fell asleep without the help of adults. At that moment, Puriol thought about lightness.

According to the author, we are mistaken when we think that incredible efforts must be made to achieve results. For example, suffer for the sake of beauty, study languages ​​diligently, or squeeze all the juice out of yourself. in training. Puriol is convinced that in some cases excessive efforts are not only useless, but also harmful.

Sometimes letting time do some of the work doesn't mean sitting back. This means being efficient. In the book, the author reflects on how to achieve lightness, and cites famous Frenchmen as examples: Descartes, Cyrano de Bergerac, Rodin, Gerard Depardieu, Stendhal and others.

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3. “4,000 weeks. Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Berkman

According to the author, journalist Oliver Berkman, this is another book about how to make the best use of our time. But it is based on the belief that achievement the time management we are accustomed to has failed miserably, and we should not pretend that this is not the case. No more delusions about the need to be productive.

Berkman sees productivity as a trap that increases employment. No matter how much we try to deal with the work, it accumulates faster and faster. It is worth doing the opposite: learning the art of procrastinating, being in the present moment, relaxing and letting go of control.

The author advises accepting as a fact that no one in history has managed to achieve a balance between life and work. You won't be able to do it, even if you honestly do the six things that successful people do before 7 am. But accepting your defeat, the fact that the day you can take everything is under control and finally clean up all the cases, never comes, is a great idea. Because after that, real time management begins.

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4. “Find yourself: How to realize your true desires and become happier”, Leonid Krol

The phrase "find yourself" sounds both trite and paradoxical. Every person roughly knows who he is. But many do not understand where to move in life, how to make the right choice and understand what they really want.

Coach Leonid Krol writes that “I” consists of some unshakable pillars: for example, “I am 45 years old”, “I am a mother”, “I am a director”, “I am a Jew”. But also from fluid, varied, vivid and unstable states, desires and sentiments. And if everything is more or less clear with the “passport” data, then there are difficulties with the second part. In the book "Find Yourself" Leonid Krol explains how to better understand your characteristics, find in yourself a sincere drive and the ability to have fun, move forward and live to the fullest coil.

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5. “Dive into yourself. How to understand why we think one thing, feel another, and act as always, Vladislav Chubarov

Clinical psychologist Vladislav Chubarov explains that awareness is the unity of emotions, sensations and thoughts. It is a skill that can be developed and that helps build relationships with yourself and others. The author compares the path to this state with a dive into the water: the depth is behind mental defenses in order to immerse yourself in it, you need to learn to concentrate on emotional pain - the one that is behind thoughts and anxiety. The specialist tells how not to run away from it, not to rationalize, not to seize and not to drink, but to take it drop by drop. And to learn to realize and feel, to experience what all the past years I tried to hide from.

This book is about how to understand yourself, identify motives and fears, make friends with the person who looks at you from the mirror. Chubarov tells what self-sufficiency is and how to make relationships with loved ones happier. The book contains advice on how to accept your dark side, build a better version of yourself and live "in such a distant and such an attractive depth of awareness."

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6. Hidden Motives: The Real Reasons for Our Behavior by Angela Ahola

For centuries, people have been searching for the origins of motivation. Why do we behave this way and not otherwise? Finding answers to this question, we begin to better understand ourselves and others, we can more clearly foresee what will follow next and how others will act. Angela Ahola, PhD, has written a book about who we are as humans: our behavior, motivations, relationships, and ways of understanding each other.

From the book you will learn what hidden motives exist inside us, how they manifest themselves outside and how they create problems for us in life. Then, get acquainted with practical tools that will teach you how to manage your motives and turn them into personal ones. superpowers.

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7. "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck: The Paradoxical Way to Live Happily" by Mark Manson

The book by blogger Mark Manson attracts attention with its bold title. But let it not mislead you: the author does not offer to become indifferent to everything that happens in life, but tells how to learn to prioritize.

Manson writes about false success and how to counter it, explains why the insatiable thirst for satisfaction unhealthy ambitions does not lead to anything good, and shares effective ways to comprehend the "subtle art of indifference."

“Send it all to hell” in Manson’s philosophical concept means the ability to look at things sensibly, face your fears boldly and strive only for what is real. valuable. The author of the book reminds that life is short, and no one knows at what point it will end. In order not to bite your elbows in your dying moments from the fact that time is wasted, already now he proposes to leave in life only what is important to you. And spit on everything else and forget. How to do this in practice - and is described in the book.

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