4 books that can change the way you see the world. Recommended by readers of Lifehacker

"Let's talk about loss. You're in pain and that's okay." Megan Devine

When my close friend's husband suddenly died, I wanted to support her, but I didn't know how. I just couldn't find the right words.

Then my psychologist suggested this book. It can be useful both to people who have lost a loved one, and to those who do not know how to support a person in such a situation.

Its author is a psychotherapist who faced the death of a partner. Unable to find literature that reflected her feelings at that time, she decided to describe her experience in the hope that it would help someone else.

Many thoughts became discoveries for me, although I felt something similar. For example, the fact that all the typical "encouraging" phrases - "Hold on, you're strong!", "You can do it!", "Everything will definitely be fine!", "Time heals" - in case

care they don’t help a loved one, they only make it worse.

If you can't find the right words, say so. If there is an opportunity to take on some household chores - buying groceries, caring for children or pets - do it. Or just stay close.

"Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality" by Eliezer Yudkowsky

"Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality" fanfictionbut very good quality. The main idea is that Petunia (Harry Potter's aunt) is not marrying the Dursleys, but an Oxford professor.

As a result, Harry grows up in a more supportive scientific environment and at the age of 11 already knows about statistical analysis, quantum mechanics, cognitive psychology... It's great and fun.

In his book, Yudkowsky tried to talk about the cognitive traps we fall into and how we can develop critical thinking. Therefore, the conflict between good and evil is shown here as a conflict between knowledge and ignorance.

I read HP and MRM when I was in my first year of medical school. And the book helped me to look at the world more soberly and judiciously. And the methods of rational thinking - analysis, comparison and systematization of facts - I still use.

Why is he doing this? Who is an abuser and how to resist him, Lundy Bancroft

I often hear that people are tired of the word "abuse". It seems to me that the value of this term is really lost if it is used incorrectly. But in fact, this is a serious problem that often occurs in relationships. Moreover, both between romantic partners and between parents and children.

I grew up in a family where emotional and physical abuse was the norm. When it caught my eye book clinical psychologist Lundy Bancroft, I did not think that I would find answers and explanations for my situation in it. I was just interested in the topic. Nevertheless, it was she who helped to realize that my behavior in many situations was justified. And that people have no right to use violence against me.

The book lists the signs of abuse, the reasons for the behavior of the aggressor, the reactions of the victim and ways of self-help. Much of what was written there translated well into my experience. For example, I learned that abuse victims often agree with the abuser. They think that he is telling the truth: their friends are not very good, and they themselves are not a gift, and the aggressors wish them "only the best."

I tried to pass this book through my own filter: to analyze and not accept everything that is written there as the truth. For example, Bancroft talks about male abusers. But it is important to note that this behavior is also characteristic of some women. None of us is immune to emotional and physical abuse.

The book helped me a lot. Using examples from her, I later explained to my mother why she felt guilty and sorry for her father, despite everything he did. I also noticed that it became easier for me to communicate with people and understand my own and others' boundaries.

The Financier, Theodore Dreiser

read this bookwhile in his first year of university. Initially, I was interested in the description: "The Financier" tells the development of a very entrepreneurial man Cowperwood from the early years of his life.

From it, I learned an important thought for myself: any crisis opens up new opportunities. Do not be afraid to take risks - however, you need to do it deliberately.

I would recommend including The Financier in the school curriculum. First, the book encourages the development of financial literacy. Secondly, it develops the skill of strategic planning. And thirdly, there is a place for romance on the pages - this is an opportunity to get in touch with the beautiful through fiction.

Now I plan to re-read The Financier again - I will definitely find something new for myself.