9 historical facts that sound crazy

1. King Henry VIII was beaten by a constable and imprisoned for vagrancy

In the 16th century, King Henry VIII ruled England. A perfectly normal monarchHenry VIII: rid the kingdom of the influence of the pope Roman with the Holy See, founded the Anglican Church, initiated the Reformation in England, and generally strengthened the country's position on the world stage.

True, at the same time, he caused significant damage to the treasury, arranging feastsYoung Henry: The Rise of Henry VIII and buying cups and tapestries in quantities for which the English economy was not designed, arranged massive repression of political opponents. He was also married six times and successfully executed some of his wives.

In his early years of reign, Henry was characterized byThe Tudors: A Very Short Introduction, Will the Real Henry VIII Please Stand Up?

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contemporaries as "an educated, attractive and charismatic king." But in the later ones - as a "lustful, selfish and paranoid tyrant." In general, everything is as usual.

Heinrich was a versatile personality and in his free time from politics I did sports, played the lute, sang, composed music, wrote poetry and prose, played dice and tennis, participated in knightly tournaments and hunted. Collected a huge library and knew at least three languages. But by old age he grew fat and had a lot of diseases. And he also has new entertainment.

Henry's extensive collection of weapons had a very wild device.Combination mace and gun - Holy Water Sprinkler (1501‑1530) - a hybrid of a mace and a three-barreled pistol. The product was ironically called Holy Water Sprinkler.

The king disguised himself in an inconspicuous outfit, armed himself with this device and went on his own to patrol the streets in search of vagabonds and idlers. The fact is that his majesty passed the lawBloody Code against parasitism, according to which able-bodied people, noticed for collecting alms three times, were subject to execution. When the king was boring, he personally contributed to the implementation of this decree.

In general, Heinrich was leisurely strolling through London at night with his mace and suddenly came acrossThe Guide to Knowledge on the guard. The commissioner asked the Majesty for documents. Henry tried to hit the law enforcement officer, but he took the mace from him with his bare hands, hit the cuffs and sent the violator to prison.

Everything is according to the law: the unemployed cannot walk the streets, and even less so for an incomprehensible type with an unregistered weapon.

One can only imagine the horror of the guard when the next morning at the trial Henry was identified as the king. The constable was already mentally saying goodbye to life, but the monarch did not hold a grudge against him. On the contrary, he generously rewarded the guard for his diligence. Henry got along well with his cellmates during the night in the dungeon, so he also gave the orderThe Guide to Knowledge to improve the diet and living conditions of prisoners and ordered to increase the stocks of bread and coal given to them.

This proves that monarchs sometimes it is helpful to spend a little time closer to mere mortals.

2. Tamerlane burned camels alive to scare enemy elephants

Once the famous emir Timur, aka Tamerlane, got bored. Judge for yourself: you are already 60, you are the lordEmpire of Timurids a huge empire, defeated everyone he could reach, captured everything that was bad. And then suddenly I realized that you simply have nothing else to do.

For some time, Timur had fun, equipping his capital, Samarkand, burying it with palaces and gardens, and played chess (perhaps it was he who came up withTamerlane chess a kind of game "Tamerlane's chess").

But soon he got tired of city-planning simulators, and he abandoned chess, suspectingNomadic Empires: From Mongolia to the Danubethat all rivals succumb to him, so as not to upset. Therefore, Tamerlane decided, out of nothing to do, to seize India - there just began a civil war in the Delhi Sultanate.

The official reason: "I, Emir Timur, and my subjects are devout Muslims, and you are idolaters in your India." Tamerlane was a notable opportunist and regularly usedTamerlane: Sword of Islam, Conqueror of the World Islam for its own political purposes.

The army of Timur, which he, as the nomads is supposed to have, led personally, invaded India and began traditional Mongolian amusements: looting and capturing civilians into slavery. When there were too many slaves - about 100,000 people, Tamerlane ordered them all to be eliminatedBattle of delhi - just to be on the safe side, so they don't get in the way.

The slightest bit of significant resistance awaited him only on the approach to the walls of Delhi. The troops of Sultan Nasiruddin Mahmud Shah of Delhi were ready to meet Tamerlane with a march of 120 war elephants. They were dressed up in chain mail, and, according to rumors, they smeared their tusks with poison.

This became a serious problem: the Mongol cavalry was frightened by the elephant's roar, and the soldiers themselves, who had never seen proboscis, were horrified. Timur's army began to retreat. An unconventional solution was urgently requiredTamerlane: Sword of Islam, Conqueror of the World, and Tamerlane found him.

The emir ordered that all the camels in his army be loaded with straw, set on fire and driven on the elephants.

The distraught camels rushed to the battle formations of Mahmud, wreaking havoc and confusion in the orderly ranks of the Indian warriors. Seeing this indecency, the elephants reasoned logically: “If this psychopath treats his camels this way, what will he do to us? " - and decided to immediately withdraw from the battle.

Making a tactical retreat, the elephants threw off the drivers and trampled on a significant part of the defenders of Delhi. The revived Mongols surrounded the defeated opponents and exterminated the remaining soldiers, and then exterminatedBattle of delhi, according to various sources, up to 50,000 civilians. In total, up to 1,000,000 civilians were killed during Tamerlane's Indian campaign.

Tamerlane then collected the fleeing elephants, formed a new detachment of elephants and successfully used in the Angora battle against Bayezid the Lightning, almost completely collapsing the Ottoman Empire.

3. The Dutch ate their own prime minister

In 1653 in the Netherlands, a wealthy lawyer, financier and mathematician named Jan de Witt tookJan de Witt, Great pensioner post of the great pensioner of the United Provinces. In Holland and Zeeland, this was one of the highest officials - something like the prime minister.

Jan de Witt was a very prominent figure. He defended the country's independence during two wars with England, concluded several lucrative peace treaties, improved the financial affairs of the state - in general, he made Holland great again.

And the Dutch liked him so much that they re-elected him to the post of the great pensioner for 20 years in a row.

But one day everything went awry.

In 1672, King Louis XIV of France took and invadedFranco ‑ Dutch War in the United Provinces, and in alliance with England. The Dutch successfully resisted the English fleet, but the French had the advantage on land. In order to delay their advance, the Dutch even had to destroy several dams and flood a couple of other provinces.

Naturally, decadent sentiments were brewing in society. The year 1672 was namedYear of disasters The year of disasters, in Dutch - Rampjaar. Did you think 2020th was the hardest one?

The people who had previously supported de Witt now began to blame him for all their troubles. He was stripped of power, sentenced to exile, and the powers were transferred to stadtholder William of Orange. Jan's brother, Cornelis de Witt, was imprisoned and tortured on trumped-up conspiracy charges. But this was not enough for the Dutch.

On August 20, Jan de Witt went to the Hague prison to say goodbye to his brother before exile. A drunken crowd surrounded him and the beating began. Cornelis was dragged out of the cell and began to beat him along with his brother. Both were simply torn to pieces.

Then they cut off the bodies of the brothersYear of disasters, John de Witt, grand pensionary of Holland, 1625-1672 pieces, fried on a fire and eaten on the spot.

The half-eaten bodies were left hanging upside down until they were gnawed down to the skeletons of a bird. So much for the people's love.

This spectacle was captured in his painting "The corpses of the de Witt brothers" by their contemporary, the artistJan de Baen the golden age of Jan de Baen. Before that, by the way, he painted portraits of both - still alive - de Witts.

4. In ancient Greece and Rome, wounds were tied up with cobwebs

Life was not easy for the average Roman legionnaire. Either an arrow will fly into the knee, or some unwashed barbarians will throw a spear in the eye. Therefore, the Romans were among the first in history to organize medical units in their legions.

And for dressing wounds, they often used not a simple cloth, but a cobweb.Chance meeting leads to creation of antibiotic spider silk, Researchers Have Created an Antibiotic Spider Silk That Heals Wounds. Why? Perhaps spiders were believed to bring good luck, or something like that. Greeks By the way, they did the same: they cleaned the wound with honey and vinegar and stuffed more cobwebs into it. The patient is ready - carry the next one.

Penicillin, antibiotics and normal bandages were not brought to the Roman medical units, so the legionnaires did what they could.

In general, theoretically, bandaging wounds with cobwebs makes some sense. ResearchSpider Silk: Could ‘Webicillin’ Beat Infections?, Evaluation of wound healing potential of spider silk using mice model scientists from the University of Wyoming show that it promotes blood clotting, because rich in vitamin K, helps to keep damaged surfaces clean and prevents infection. It is not rejected by the human body and can be used for better engraftment implants.

Another thing is that the experiments used a spider web grown in sterile boxes by specially trained spiders. If you wrap your finger with material collected in the attic, you risk getting tetanus.FIRST AID INSTRUCTIONS.

And some spiders and completely coverSome spiders may spin poisonous webs laced with neurotoxins their nets are poison to welcome guests with maximum warmth and care.

5. In Strasbourg in the 16th century, 400 people suddenly began to dance and some danced to death

In July 1518, a woman named Troffea decided toIn a spin: the mysterious dancing epidemic of 1518, A forgotten plague: making sense of dancing mania go outside and dance. What drove her is not clear, because she danced, according to various sources, from four to six days.

Several other young women first tried to stop her, but then began to dance with her. Then men joined them and the number of dancers increased to 34 people, and then to 400.

So they danced until the magistrate of Strasbourg and the local bishop intervened and ordered everyone to be rounded up and sent to the hospital. This whole disco lasted no less than a month.

Some particularly violent dancers have contrivedIn a spin: the mysterious dancing epidemic of 1518, A forgotten plague: making sense of dancing mania die - most likely from heart attacks, strokes and physical exhaustion. According to the most daring estimates, 15 people were killed per day.

However, this numeral may well be an exaggeration of later chroniclersWaller (John), Les danseurs fous de Strasbourg. Une épidémie de transe collective en 1518. In particular, the famous alchemist and physician Paracelsus, who investigated the causes of the dancing plague eight years later.

However, the fact that people for no reason at all fell into madness and threw themselves into a dance, it is confirmed quite reliably. And it happenedA forgotten plague: making sense of dancing mania it is not only in Strasbourg, but also in Erfurt, Maastricht and other cities in West Germany, the Netherlands and northeastern France.

The disease was namedSaint Vit "St. Vitus dance".

Among the possible reasonsDancing Plague of 1518 what happened - mass hysteria due to stress (life in Middle Ages she had it), intoxication with ergot bread (poisoning with it is called ergotism), which contains alkaloids that act as LSD, or simply religious ecstasy.

6. The son of the Roman emperor Claudius accidentally killed himself with a pear

Claudius was a good emperorClaudius: built a bunch of roads, aqueducts and canals, rebuilt the Roman economy after being abused by his predecessor, Caligula, and began the conquest of Britain. In general, a normal ruler, there have been worse.

From his first wife, Plautia Urgulanilla, he had a son - Tiberius Claudius Drusus. The emperor betrothed him in advance to the daughter of the commander of his praetorian guard, Sejanus. This marriage was supposed to build bridges between Claudius and the Praetorians, but Drusus mixed all the cards.

At a feast, he threw a pear into the air. Caught her with his mouth. Choked and died. Everything.

I wrote about itClaudius drusus Roman historian Suetonius. And the moral is this: do not indulge with food.

7. Animals were judged in medieval Europe

With criminals in the Middle Ages, they never really stood on ceremony. Gender, age, physical condition and even biological species Themis cared little. For that matter, it didn't matter at all if defendant at all.

Therefore, if the law was violated not by a person, but by an animal, bird or even an insect, medieval European courts still held a hearing. The accused were assigned lawyers, allowed to call witnesses, their bleating or growling was recorded in the protocol - in general, everything was according to the rules of jurisprudence.

Most often, the defendantsThe Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals by E. P. Evans, LAW, FOLKLORE AND ANIMAL LORE there were pigs. They could attack and eat small children left unattended. The killers were tried to the fullest extent.

For example, in 1386 in the French city of Falaise, a pigMedieval Animal Trials, Four-footed law: How the animal trials were conducted, Medieval animal trials in Europe - A pig sentenced to death by hanging for murder gnawed at the baby named Jean le Meaux on the face and hand, which the latter, as expected, did not survive. The lawyer could not find extenuating circumstances, and after a nine-day investigation, the defendant's paw and snout were chopped off, thus reproducing the injuries inflicted on the victim. And then they dressed them in human clothes and hung them up on the gallows.

At the same time, the executioner got his gloves dirty and demanded from the local viscount, who was in charge of the process, 10 sous for new ones. He received the money, which he was “very pleased with”.

Another interesting trial over sow took placeMedieval Animal Trials, Four-footed law: How the animal trials were conducted, Medieval animal trials in Europe - A pig sentenced to death by hanging for murder in 1394 in Normandy, in the city of Morten. This time, before being hanged, the pig was also dragged through the streets to the shouts of the crowd: “Shame! A shame!" This is because there was an aggravating circumstance: the accused not only ate the child, but did it on Friday - and this is a fast day.

Were tried not only pigs. Once in 1474 in Switzerland, in the city of Basel, a rooster was sentencedRats, Pigs, and Statues on Trial: The Creation of Cultural Narratives in the Prosecution of Animals and Inanimate Objects, The Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals by E. P. Evans, LAW, FOLKLORE AND ANIMAL LORE to burning. Why? Because, according to the mistress, he denied the Lord, became a sorcerer, entered into a relationship with Satan and laid an egg without a yolk. And from such eggs, as you know, basilisks hatch - monsters that turn people with their eyes to stone.

Basilisk is not a snake from "Harry Potter", but a hybridBasilisk rooster, dragon, lizard and toad, poisonous, killing with gaze and breath, as well as regurgitating sour creamBasilisk. It can be killed with weasel urine and rooster crows. Yes, the superstitious people of the Middle Ages had more fantasy than Rowling.

The defendant's guilt was proven, he was sent to the stake, and egg destroyed before the monster was born.

TriedRats, Pigs, and Statues on Trial: The Creation of Cultural Narratives in the Prosecution of Animals and Inanimate Objects, The Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals by E. P. Evans, LAW, FOLKLORE AND ANIMAL LORE also locusts for spoiling crops, rats for eating grain on an especially large scale, and more.

For example, in 1451 in Lausanne, a trial of leeches was carried outRats, Pigs, and Statues on Trial: The Creation of Cultural Narratives in the Prosecution of Animals and Inanimate Objects, The Criminal Prosecution and Capital Punishment of Animals by E. P. Evans, LAW, FOLKLORE AND ANIMAL LORE and passed such a measure of judicial restraint: the bloodsuckers were ordered to leave the vicinity of the city. The leeches disobeyed, and the local bishop excommunicated them. I could have imposed a penance for a start, but I decided to slash from the shoulder. The leeches must have been very upset.

8. The mummies were used to make paint. And they ate them

There is such a paint - mummy brown, or egyptian brown, or caput mortuum ("dead man's head"). It has a rich brown hue - something between burnt and untreated umber. She was very much appreciated by the Pre-Raphaelite artists.

In the XVI-XVII centuries it was madeThe Adeline art dictionary, including terms in architecture, heraldry, and archeology, Utilisations des momies de l'antiquité à l'aube du XX siècle made of white resin, myrrh and crushed remains ancient Egyptian mummies - both human and feline. The mummies of the Guanches, the indigenous inhabitants of the Canary Islands, were used for the same purposes.

The problem is that you can't get enough of mummies for all the artists, so paint sellers had to go for tricks.

When a normal mummy was not at hand, one was madeThe secret lives of color of criminals or slaves. One seller in the city of Alexandria made as many as 40 pieces with his own hand.

In the 19th century, when artists began to recognizeThe chemistry of paints and paintingthan they, in fact, paint pictures, paint began to dramatically lose popularity. For example, Baronet Edward Burne-Jones solemnly buried a tube with such a pigment, giving honors to the deceased. Now a similar shade is obtained from a mixture of kaolin, quartz, goethite and hematite.

They also made mummiesMummia the drug mummy, or mumiyo, is a mixture of resin and crushed mummy, aphrodisiactaken internally. And lollipops with honey (medicine for all diseases, taken orally).

But the rumor that steam locomotives were drowned with mummies is a myth.Do Egyptians burn mummies as fuel?, which appeared thanks to the work of Mark Twain.

Judge for yourself: how far will you go on them? This needs a mummy mammoth some. No, good old coal is much better.

9. The perpetrators were identified in court through trials and duels

In the Middle Ages, there were some problems with the conduct of the investigation: fingerprints could not be collected, DNA analysis could not be carried out, surveillance cameras were not yet widespread.

Therefore, it remained to rely only on the testimony of witnesses. And in the absence of such - at God's will. Since it was not possible to directly figure it out, workarounds had to be used.

Method one - hordesTrial by ordeal, that is, tests by fire or water. The defendant was given a hot stone or a piece of iron or lead that was reddened by the heat. Managed to carry the required number of steps - justified. Potential witches and heretics should be drowned or pour boiling water oversurvivors were forgiven. It was believed that God would help the innocent.

As you can imagine, he helped few.

Method two - trial by duelTrial by combat, which is even more interesting. During the battles, all sorts of funny incidents happened. For example, one such duel describedGalbert of Bruges and the Historiography of Medieval Flanders the chronicler Galbert of Bruges in his chronicle "The Betrayal and Murder of Charles the Good, Count of Flanders." One knight, Herman Iron, accused another, Guy of Steenward, of complicity in the murder of the count. They began a legal duel, and this is what came of it:

Herman was declared the winner, and the wounded Guy, along with the other conspirators who were guilty of the Count's murder, were hanged.