Why successful people are often unhappy?

This is not a rhetorical question. The answer to that has tried to find an expert in recruiting Alain Vladimir. She is one of the leading Russian Internet hunters, headed direction Talent Search in Mail. Ru Group, as well as established hantingovoe Agency PRUFFI. Alyona rich experience in the field of recruitment, about the career ups and downs, she knows firsthand. Below are her reflections on professionally successful, but unhappy people.

You 35. You apparently professionally successful. And it is absolutely miserable. You - Career hostage. In a career there are three types of hostages:

• hostage of the business;
• hostage obligations;
• hostage name.

But whatever you are, in fact the result of one.

Hostage of the business

You have your own business, or you are the big boss in another business, or you are a professional so that your name has become synonymous with the industry. Once it was the work of your life, your dream. Years passed. How long have you not love what you are doing. Are you tired. You come every day to the office, dreamed about a few years ago, inspired to dozens of exploits, hundreds and sometimes thousands of people and still feel unhappy.

But

You can not admit it even to himself, not to mention all around. Because the amount of the obligations suspended on you in front of investors, creditors, partners, industry, it makes you sit every day at 9:15 in the official or private car.

Upset

Most often, these stories are very pitiable end. If you are a startup, then one day you look in the release that the new CEO of your business, and you "have decided to focus on ..." (hereinafter referred to write "on strategy", "on the product," "on the new directions"). If you work in a large corporation, you usually do not wait even a press release - just resignation from the "golden parachute" or gradual decline in career speed (you will bypass your same students).

How to fight - suspended animation career

Belousov He says you have to leave. Ryzhikov He says - stay inside the business, and switch. I'm not a man, and will not be so categorical. I understand, difficult to leave. Firstly, I do not want anything in this state, that is in fact nowhere. Second, you have to this time, children, family, loans, mortgages. And it's easy to say "go away", but you can not deprive the usual level of income favorite.

What to do

First of all, stop lying to yourself. To be honest, I no longer love what I do. And it's not temporary insanity. This standard diagnosis. And I do not need to draw bows on stuhshem cake.

The second - to understand, and that you love? It's easy to say. It is very difficult to formulate. The majority in this state loves to do anything. Well mentors startups more (sometimes even worse than nothing).

Is no dream - to wait. Oddly enough, not to leave, not stay. Hang in suspended animation career. Do a good routine work (you, most likely, by this time a good professional and OSes quality and can effectively perform even with your eyes closed).

The main thing - to stop the building of the old life. It is impossible to think that a new project within the old pull you out of a professional crisis. Do not pull out. At this stage, a huge number of people are beginning to professional hysterics: give up work, throw in other extreme-businesses, where they become equally unsuccessful, leave for half a year in the distant countries, where there are nothing but return due to falling out of context unclaimed. Home is your task now - no fuss and hysteria, to hear new self. Remember: you are not sick, you are not tired, you have not got cold feet. You are reborn. It does not happen quickly. This period requires several things:

• absolute iron will;
• absolute discipline;
• absolute selfish introspection.

We do the following. In order to feed the family, we continue to work. On the machine. Ironically, the more you turn your head at this point, the more successful you will be. You are hysterical and temporary insanity (exactly this leads to the press releases, which I wrote above). Partners and investors say behind your back: "God knows what, was a normal man, and half a year already insane." You little control over your emotions (even if from the outside it does not seem so). Therefore, the mechanically would you do as a stamp (when you launch the 15th product - it is 90% mechanics), the greater the guarantee of success - you're so professional, that the habit and your team will pull out everything. If you turn your head, you will be destroyed. If reasonable turn off the load, as the plane on autopilot. But remember: this machine will rescue you from three months to six months. Further, most likely, will not last - any business requires dedication and tops driving and the lack of it does not forgive the long-term development.

What to do in these six months?

1. Many go to the non-sectoral exhibition and conference. Communicate with people of other businesses. Many do not read in the profession. Ideally, if the start to learn. Perhaps new knowledge does not get it, but get to know other people and "clean his head." Your main task - to give you a new chance of life. And he will come only if you expand the environment. In the old environment, most likely, you have chosen a meaningful chances.
2. Full concentration on myself: sports, health, perhaps even meditation, diet. You have no idea how we are what we eat and drink.
3. Not hysteria. Do not rush into any apparent chance with his head. Try something else in the hobby mode, mentoring, patronage, sponsorship, talks until torknet really. Otherwise, instead of having to go out of the hostages, you will become hostage to a few more unnecessary businesses.

Remember, the only chance for career hostage out of their condition - a clear answer yourself, "I want to continue to do ...". This answer does not dream of you, like the periodic table. A few months (and sometimes years) you spend on trying to find a new dream (although then everyone, including you, it would seem that it had fallen a chance). If you do not lie to yourself and feel sorry for yourself, you find it. And there are no magic recipes: no ashrams in Nepal or breathing practices, or long vacations. Only a daily question, "Who am I and what I want to do next?". And the daily slow steps, which are obstinacy and will lead to the exit.

A very important point - to give

• Discard the long-term career plans for these six months. Are not subject to additional responsibilities that you have is not important.
• Try this time to give up a very serious purchase, if they force you to borrow.
• Learn to say "no" to all unnecessary, at this stage makes you raskontsentrirovatsya.
• And very important: try as far as possible (every business is different, and not always possible) to be as non-public.

Now for you the main thing - to think, to analyze, to look for. Anything that distracts and takes away from it, should be deleted.

What if six months later and found

But blame yourself here. So, too sorry for myself; We thought to the intensity, which should have been; too distracted by the imperative; nevertheless seduced on existing contracts in the field of the unloved (money, position). My experience is that anyone who really wanted to find a new, six months found. The world knows the best businesses are built by those who are 45+. Let the same in your life to make you happy. Just do not resist the new and do not interfere with her to lead you on.