No excuses: "Love has no disability" - an interview with the webmaster Vitali Pchelkin
A Life Inspiration / / December 19, 2019
Want to "recharge" the youth and beauty? Then read the interview with Vitaly Pchelkin, Kiev webmaster to create a useful resource for people with disabilities, and its companion Uliana.
The boys move in wheelchairs. But this does not prevent them from living a bright, full of adventure and romance, life. Enjoy reading!
headfirst
- Hello, Vitaly! Glad you're in the project "No excuses."
- Hi, Nastya!
- Tell us about your childhood.
- My parents - the military. We travel a lot. I must have been born in Azerbaijan, where he served his father, but he was born near Kiev, which at the time was staying mum. Up to 3 years living in Azerbaijan, then there began a military conflict and parents moved to Ukraine. And when the Soviet Union collapsed, his father was sent to serve in Yevpatoria. Where I lived for 15 years.
- Parents strongly you were raised, in the military?
- I can not say that strongly, but I always felt responsible. My father was chief of staff - I could not give up the slack.
Childhood was interesting. We lived in a military town, and there is a special atmosphere.
- For sure, I wanted to be a war?
- At first, yes. Dad told me that I was a child always "commanded" to build other children in the hotel where we stayed and played in the "access control". :)
But closer to the senior class plans changed. Father was transferred to Kiev - where I finished 10 and 11 classes, and then enrolled in the National Aviation University. He was to become an engineer of medical hardware systems. But eventually transferred to marketing.
- Due to an injury?
- Yes. I did not see prospects for themselves in the service of medical equipment.
- Tell me what happened July 26, 2007?
- It was a very chaotic day - everything went wrong, not according to plan. I then worked in a sanatorium in Yalta, and had lived in the country, in the country. But the time I used to be long, and I did not have time to leave, stayed overnight in the city.
On that day, I was working and, therefore, had to stay in the city. But I quickly finished the job and had the last bus. I came out of the city, meeting with friends.
It was boring and very hot. We decided to go to the recreation center to the sea. It was about 12 o'clock at night, but not stuffy subsided. We came to the pier, and then slide. It is understood that the four young men could not pass by. Decided to take a ride, take a dip.
I do not remember who, but someone shouted: "Let's head forward ?!". First, "I left" my friend, then another, and then I ...
I do not remember the moment of impact. Doctors then explained that, according to the injury, I flew down the hills, could not regroup and stuck his head into the floor.
- You have been in the mind? Immediately I realized what happened to you?
- He was conscious, but not immediately realized. I floated to the bottom face, not choking, do not choke. Just silence, night, quiet and lights from the shore flit through the water.
I quickly picked up the friend began to drag ashore. I saw that my hands were unnaturally hang thought that broke them. He ran another one, caught by the legs. I can see it, but the legs do not feel. Here I realized that something was wrong.
Although, after all, neither I nor any of my friends to know that I broke his neck. "It happens, take to the hospital - returned to life." I even sat on a bench to dress, and then I'm sitting in the car driving to the hospital, which, as I learned later, it was impossible to do.
- You're so easy to talk about it, and I had goose bumps on the back ...
- It is often asked. :)
- You hang out with the guys who were with you that night?
- Yes, when I come to Yevpatoria, we meet and communicate. I do not think anyone guilty.
- And they do not feel for a fault?
- If it did not happen with me, but with someone of my friends, I think I would have blamed himself. Therefore, probably, and they were such. Especially at first, when they came to me with frightened eyes.
But I told them: "Be glad that you do not!". In addition, they see what I do now. See that, in spite of what happened, we remain on an equal footing. So I can not say that our relationship is suffering because of some guilt.
- Who supported you the most at the moment?
- Father. My mother died in 2005. Therefore, the first month, when I was lying in intensive care, he did not leave me. Literally slept under the bed. At that time he devoted himself entirely to me. We can say thanks to him that I survived.
- It was hard psychologically?
- I am not inclined to depression, so to me, rather, it was hard physically, but not mentally. I was annoyed that I could not eat himself, brush his teeth, get dressed.
A psychological problems from the fact that I am from erectus became wheelchair, I did not. And now there is. Moreover, not sure what I would have thought the same way as it is now, doing what now, if it had not broken his neck. Prior to that, I am quite fast life aimlessly.
InvaFishki
- Vitaly, what independence?
- for me - is the freedom to make decisions.
After the injury, I wanted to be independent, to give freedom to his father and himself. Dad was "bound" to me almost around the clock - running from work to help me sit up, roll over, etc. I had a goal - to become independent in life that each of us has his own life.
And, of course, independence - is financial independence.
- How did you bought it after an injury?
- I started earning before learned to eat alone. :) I was looking for the ability to use your phone: I had a button that was hard for me, and just appeared the first iPhon'y. I fired up - father and sister bought my iPhone.
It is now simple, but then they were still "raw", without the Russian language. On the third day, I flash it... and broke. I still remember - shaking hands, and on the screen tsiferki as in a matrix, run.
But I began to understand, look for options for how to fix the phone. I climbed to the forum at the store where he bought and began to chat with other "Kulibina". There became regulars. Store developed. Over time, they needed a man who would write the news, led the forum, answering questions from users. They contacted me and offered the job.
- Internet has become a "feed"?
- I can not say I was earning a lot of money. But I have gained experience, began to study the development of sites.
- Vitaly, in my opinion, you - a real layfhaker. Your project "InvaFishki" - is hacking the system, where instead of "can not" appear "I can, but in a different way." How did you come to mind to do such a project?
- After the injury, I was faced with the fact that information on how to adapt sheyniku life for themselves, not enough. Rather, it is - all can be found in the forums and in personal correspondence. But it is very inconvenient - it is necessary to re-read a ton of information to find one thing.
I've been thinking how it can be changed. I came across a Swedish life and came up with a format "InvaFishek". The format is simple: the site is collected and categorized the various devices for persons with disabilities (for home, work, sports, etc.). At the same time, the platform open - anyone can send a "chip", to tell about it to people.
- That is, you do not have the team of authors, and the resource is developed on the basis of user-generated content?
- You could say that. But the project is young (I was only in February it launched). Until recently, almost all the "chips" and added he was looking for. I've been collecting them, and I know that such devices need not only to me but also to so many people.
For example, in the West, people with Parkinson's disease is not a problem to eat soup, because they know that eat with a spoon, cushioning tremor of the hands, so that you can safely bring the broth to a mouth and normally eat. We still have not heard much about that.
But lately, the resource is attracting increasing interest from the public, and I have already written by people who say they are ready to write for the project, to help him.
- You know, we have in one of his interviews was employed Alex Nalogin. He is also a big layfhaker. He was a project for the supply invabaykov from Thailand. But in Russia, it has not been supported. What do you think, is it worth to wait for support from the state or have to rely only on themselves?
- All in our hands. The state can and should count, but you need to soberly assess the situation. If it does not give you the stroller, which you need, that you want, then you need to look for options, where you can buy it himself.
The easiest way to sit back and criticize the government.
We do like to criticize without offering anything. We must look for the right approach. Study literature, law, and, coming to the clerk's office, not to complain, but to offer. For example, if you write that the ramp is not made according to the norms, then do not be unfounded - explain how you can fix it.
- As in Ukraine the situation with a barrier-free environment?
- In recent years, the situation has improved. Especially after the ratification of the UN Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities and the Euro 2012. In large cities, almost every building can be entered without any problems.
Besides, now a lot of activists who are making the installation or alteration of ramps, lifts, etc. I think if everyone in his house, the yard, the neighborhood ask such a problem, the problem is to do for a long time been solved.
- Vitaly, your name from the Latin means "life." Where do you get the power of life?
- Because life itself is just what I do. But, of course, my main source of vitality - a hive. :)
Love has no disability
(Here our conversation joined other half Vitaly - Juliana. Beautiful girl with a strong character, just one day received a spinal injury.)
- Guys tell your love story.
Juliana: We met through my social activities. I work in an organization called "Active Rehabilitation Group". One of the forms of our work - the "first contact" when we come to the guys, the injured recently, and share our knowledge, as they themselves were in their place.
Once such a "first contact" was held and Vitalik. It took 2 years after the injury, but I remember that when I went to the gym, where the meeting took place, I saw a very feeble guy who has nothing really he could not.
Vitaly: In fact, I met with Ulyana before it with me. :) Before this meeting, (4 months) I was in a sanatorium in Saki, which at the time held a marathon of people in wheelchairs. Juliana took part in it. She came with a group of guys.
I was struck by what she is cheerful and mischievous. At that time I did not go myself, standing in the shade and watched these active children, among whom I most remember the hive.
- Even then I ran a spark? :)
Vitaly: Not. I was about girls in general thought. I rather wanted to learn as much as she, the threshold to move than to have some kind of relationship. :)
- how to further develop communication?
Juliana: After that meeting in the gym went normal life. I continue to engage in active rehabilitation, he worked as an instructor in our camps. And since we live in the information age, there was a question about the organization's website. I took on this responsibility, but I did not have the necessary knowledge.
Acne parallel to this was in our camp active rehabilitation, and learning that we need a website, offered his services. We have reduced and we started to work with him on this portal.
Due to this we began a friendly relationship at first, and then, due to the fact that we lived in the same city, and often crossed at various events - friendly.
we are not a one-year friends. :)
- As the friendship grew into love?
Juliana: Between our first and second real meeting more than a year.
At the first meeting Acne seemed to me quite "dohlenkih" when I saw him for the second time, I was shocked. It was a dramatic change! We met at a drum & bass festival "Pirate Station". He came to the party, came to himself, for the night, he was an active wheelchair.
It was evident that this year Acne is not sitting still, and worked on himself.
- And who made the first move?
Vitaly: I! :)
Juliana: I! :)
Vitaly: I first embraced.
Juliana: I first kissed at the concert Red Hot Chili Peppers. :)
Vitaly: Apparently, we do.
Juliana: Yes, we summed up each other for it.
- Close were against when you decide to live together?
Juliana: My mother did not say anything at first. She knows me well, knows how much I'm independent. A year after I was absolutely active injury. Mom raised me independent. She never impose my opinion, is always to accept and respect my decision.
And when she met Vitalik personally, she told me:
"I understand why he why you are together. You look in the same direction. Looking at you appreciate that you are a couple. "
She loves Vitalik, probably more than me. :)
Vitaly: I initially had a misunderstanding with his father. Because it happened too fast for him. Literally, I went to a sanatorium, and returned from there with the girl (we are together with Ulyana rest). I for myself have decided that she will live with us and father properly in the course of the case did not enter. But now all is well - we live separately and get along with each other.
- And in the home encounter any problems? Who makes the garbage? :)
Juliana: I am by nature very domineering, my friend calls - "indoor general". I need to command, to control. But Vitalik we all coincided so well that I have found their implementation as "indoor general" - at home under my command! Simply because physically it to me easier. But all the other issues are decided by Acne. If we were physically equal, we would compete, and each has its own function.
Vitaly: And taking out the trash together. Someone takes a bucket, some quite live up to its garbage. This whole thing, but together it is within our reach! :)
- Many people with disabilities are afraid to start a relationship. What do you advise them?
Vitaly: Try. :)
Juliana: I understand them. Whole year after the injury, I was strongly against the relationship. "What kind of relationship without legs?" - I asked myself. But in fact, in me just yet then I lived disabled.
But love has no disability. You need to forget about the fact that you have no legs or arms, and not to think that no one will love you so.
If you do not love myself, then no one will love. If he does not respect, no one you will not be respected. If you do not aspire to independence, and will be dependent.
When you understand that, the world is open to you.
- Guys, when are you getting married? :)
Vitaly: We will definitely get married. On this account I have my own plan. :)
Do not be afraid to live!
- Our project is called "No excuses." What does this phrase mean to you?
Juliana: I have no time to make excuses, so much to catch! :)
Vitaly: There are no insurmountable obstacles. There is a way out of any situation. Just need a creative approach to problems. There is always a response. If you can not find it yourself, find someone who will help you.
- Finally wish something readers Layfhakera?
Juliana: To live is not as scary as it seems. Injury - it's just a new living environment. You do not know what you can do, because it did not try. Try - do not be afraid to live!
After an injury you realize that life is short. It is possible to lose one second, for example, falling from a motorcycle. Time, and you do not. People with disabilities tend to understand it. So often they engaged in sports, working at several jobs, raising children. Healthy wonder: "How do you all have time ?!". We just have tasted this life and take from it the most.
And further. Think about your loved ones. Do you need them if you do not need yourself?
Vitaly: A rolling stone gathers no moss.
I am often asked how I quit smoking. I quit, it is better not to throw anyone. He broke his neck, and quit smoking. Do not expect life shakes! Analyze what you have now, and act!
- You guys are fantastic! Thank you very much for this interview! Good luck! Take care of each other!
Vitali and Juliana: Thanks to your special project!