The biggest mistakes we make in 30 years, and what they teach us

One of the users Quora I asked a very important question: "What is the biggest mistake you have made in their 30 years, and what she taught you?". The question provoked a lively and heated debate, the most interesting ideas from which we now want to share with you.

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Do not move your life into the background

I believe that one of my biggest mistakes is that I dedicate much time to work and career, pushing everything else into the background. Under all the rest, I mean family, friends and even your own health.

After 20 years and until recently (I am now 35), I lived in this mode: wake up, go to work, come home and go to sleep, and the next day only to get to it was the same again.

I do not pay attention to how these stressful conditions harmful to my health, and did not pay enough attention to the relationship.

Looking back, I can not remember something important and significant. These years were only an endless race for a false purpose, which then seemed to be the most important.

So now I'm going to make up for everything missed. I spent a lot of time trying to understand what is really important to me, but I'm glad I realized it too late and I have a chance to live life the way I want it.

Take care of your health. This is the first and important priority. When you are 30 years old and you already feel tired and exhausted human life - it sucks, believe me.

You will be working all my life. Youth comes but once in a lifetime. Do not miss this time. Do not waste your time exclusively to the work - communicate, organize your personal life, do not limit yourself to just work and home. Suppose that after 20 or even 30 years, you will have something to remember.

Do not waste time on anger

I'm not sure that this is the answer you are looking for, but still I say the biggest mistake I made in my 30 years, was angry.

I've wasted too much of your time, angry at bosses, colleagues, politicians, women who abandoned me, and just to the people who lied to me.

My anger was justified. Even now, looking back, I realize that I had a good reason, but at the same time I realize that my anger was a waste of time. And the damage I inflicted only to itself and not to the people, to whom I was angry.

Most people who are in your life

I met a wonderful girl he really liked. But very soon, the fact that my life has truly loved one, I began to take it for granted. To make matters worse, my pride would never allow me to show her how much she is precious to me. She has long fought for our relationship, but in the end left me. Now she is married to another.

We are still friends, often communicate. It looks like a hell, but it's better than not seeing it at all.

I'm from this delivered? Do not be idiots. Pay attention to your loved one, every day, every moment show him how much you love and appreciate him. And if you know that have done foolishly, then naplyuyte to damn pride and ask for forgiveness.

Do not compare yourself with others

My biggest mistake: I thought that when I turned 30, I was immediately able to be on the top of which all life dreamed. But I began to constantly compare ourselves with those who were younger than me and, as it turns out, is much more successful. I did not have anything, while others had a house in San Francisco, a thriving business and a family.

Now I realize that I wanted to throw up at the very beginning just because someone there has been more successful than me. Do not compare yourself with others and do not think that you can achieve everything in 30 years. does not end at 30, life has just begun.

Sometimes the path to happiness lies through suffering

In my 30 years I have made four fatal mistakes.

Error number 1. I kept putting off pregnancy until later. First, I am waiting for the right time, and when it is appropriate, according to my standards, it's time, I was offered a good job with outstanding career prospects. Of course, I agreed. And, of course, I did not want to go on maternity leave right after I got a new perspective place.

A few years later, I still decided to get pregnant, but could not. This was followed by a long course of treatment, I still got pregnant, but I have had a miscarriage (words can not describe how difficult it was to survive it). A year later, I became pregnant again, and then made a second mistake, which never forgive myself.

Error number 2. Since I had always been in good form and tried to maintain it, the thought that I could go jogging and during pregnancy. In the sixth month of pregnancy during the run my water broke.

Mistake number 3. I did not fight for her child. Neither I nor my husband did not know what to do, and I'm still not sure if we were given the right advice. We were told that our baby would not survive. I injected morphine during childbirth. I do not remember what happened after that. I do not know exactly what happened to my child. It's just taken. I felt guilty, I was sick and ashamed, ashamed to this day.

Error number 4. I turned away from her husband instead of through it with him. I felt wild pain and guilt and did not know how to handle them. I moved away from her husband (from the man she loved and still love) and finally we broke up.

Life will improve only when I was 40 years old. After 40, I got married again and gave birth to a child (43 years), and now we are a happy family of three. Should I had to go through this hell, to finally find happiness? Yes, no, maybe. I have no answer.

Do not forget friends

I had some good childhood friends with whom we have grown.

My wife did not get along very well with some of them, and after their wedding, I began to pull away from his friends, because he did not want to upset her. I did not call them, do not invite to visit, did not go with them to clubs and bars, did not go with them on a fishing trip. That is not done none of the things that we did together before.

While I do not really think about it, I thought that doing the right thing, because they are my brothers, they have to understand me.

18 years later, my marriage broke up, and I really miss my good old friends. I tried to regain our friendship, but it took so much time in our life has changed so much, and even when we see each other, friends seem incredibly distant. I still hope to regain our friendship, but I understand that it will take time.

My advice to you: do not think about friends as brothers. Your brother will always be your brother, even if you hate it. The friend may not remain your friend forever. Friendship requires constant attention and participation.

The best time - is now

My mistakes:

• I spent too much money on shoes rather than spend it on travel.
• He did not continue their higher education.
• Not studied martial arts.
• I did not do family photos every year.

And you know what I realized? Do not waste time on regret - start doing something that does not have time, NOW!

Trust your feelings

I got married not because she loved a man, but because everything around me (family, friends and acquaintances) said that he was a good guy and just loves me. He was a really nice guy and he loved me, but we were too different, with this man, I lost her, "I am."

I'm not sure you can call it a mistake: we are now divorced, and we have two children, without which I can not imagine my life. Because of this, I realized the main thing: trust your feelings and never make important decisions based on the opinions of others.

To make mistakes - it's not the worst. The most terrible thing - they do not fix it

1. I did not recognize that I was depressed that every day more and more progress. I do not seek help. I missed an inordinate number of possibilities. Almost ruined his career.
2. I Felt 20 years. Did not build a serious relationship, he led a promiscuous life, arranged countless gulyanok and drank too much. Constantly hanging out with "friends", which only contributed to my deviant behavior and did not teach me anything good.
3. I do not use your free time to get a second degree or learn a foreign language. Instead, I spent it with his aforementioned "friends."
4. I am spending money on booze instead to invest in a profitable business.

If I continued to this way of life, for 40 years I would be the poor, disabled and seriously ill. Fortunately, I had the chance to reconsider their attitude to life and start all over again.

But I'm still sad to think about all the opportunities that I have missed in their 30.

What do you think about this?