5 facts about how our perception of ourselves
A Life / / December 19, 2019
Fact № 1. It is important to maintain the existing social roles
What does it mean?
Despite the fact that in recent years the theme of equality, gender and freedom of expression are raised every day, we still tend to take on too many social obligations. If your self-esteem depends on how well you maintain these real or imagined role - you are sick social perfectionism.
It is important what is expected of us as we think we are waiting for other people. it is often associated with traditional gender roles.
Thus, men are fighting expectations a "getter", "warrior" and "head of the family." The woman should be "careful", "good mother" and "create a home."
The child believes that parents should be proud and to achieve only perfect results. And we fall into despair if it does not correspond to these notions.
What to do?
Each person is peculiar perfectionism. All see themselves compared with others and put on the shackles invented social roles. Our main task - not to dwell on it.
Yes, these roles help in the beginning, but later on you can adapt them for yourself. The more they will constantly change or develop. Remember, only a conscious choice of the social role can make you happier.
Fact № 2. We exist in close connection with the group
What does it mean?
Approval of Aristotle's "Man - political animal" means that the need to dominate and obey embedded in our psychology from birth.
We pathologically preoccupied with the hierarchy, status and reputation. These are the basic elements of the human "I" more associated with time tribal politics of hunting and gathering.
It is possible to confirm the example of the chimpanzee families - 98% of our DNA is identical. "Weaker and younger chimps regularly collude with each other - so that individuals with low status, working as a team, taking serious and dangerous attempts to overthrow the leaders. They keep track of political alliances in the tribe if one protects the other chimpanzees, he will wait for the response services in future conflicts. " Reminiscent of human behavior? Of course!
How not to succumb to the rules of the group?
Try not to take decisions in haste, take a small pause. If people are trying to leave you hungry for a questionable act, stop and ask yourself a few simple questions: "Why am I doing this?", "What I want to get as a result?", "What I moves? ".
So you can keep track of, manipulated Do you have a group or is entirely your act.
Fact № 3. We are led by "interpreter" of the left hemisphere
What does it mean?
If the right hemisphere gives us the opportunity to dream and fantasize, left, and analyzes the voice these stories to our consciousness. Our brain acts as both the creator of the main character and narrator. It turns out that we perceive everything that happens as it explains the "interpreter" of the left brain.
We all have a "shell", which says to us our lives. But his explanation - just a guess.
We constantly invent situations and memories. We do feel, say something based on many subconscious reasons, but this time a special part of our brain is constantly striving to create a believable story that we want to take and why.
However, that voice is no direct access to the real causes of our actions. He does not know why we feel what we feel, and we do what we do. He's come up with.
How do you know where your real feelings, and where the interpretation of the subconscious?
To reach out to the inner "I" - not an easy task. You can walk funny testTo find out which hemisphere dominates, and track it on.
Write down on a separate piece of paper the results of each phase.
- Interlace your fingers. Which of thumb was on top? If right, then write "L" if the left, write "P".
- Aim. Select some distant object. Now pull the one hand and aim for that the thumb was on the same level with him. If stretched out his right hand - write "L" if the left - "P".
- Alternately close your eyes. When you close the eyes of the subject is shifted more strongly? If he jumps the same or do not move, write "O". If the offset is greater than at the close of the left eye, note the letter "P", if the offset is greater in the right eye closing - "L".
- Napoleon Pose. What's hand rests on top when crossed on his chest? If this is the right hand - write "L" if the left - "P".
- Put your foot on the leg. Again, what the top? If the right foot - write "L" if the left - "P".
- Podmignite. What an eye you have closed the first? If the right - note the "L" if the left - "P".
- Rotates around its own axis. In what direction do you cool? If counterclockwise - write "L", clockwise - "P".
- Divide a sheet of paper into two parts. Which was greater? If the right side, write "L" if the left - "P" if the parts are the same, put the "O".
- Triangles and squares. Draw three shapes each hand on both sides of the paper. What came out is better? If left, the mark "P" if the right, write "L".
- strokes. Each hand draw on a number of vertical strokes. What hand reproduced more images? If the left side, write "P" if the right - "L" if the same - indicates "O".
- Draw a circle. If you are drawn counterclockwise, mark "L" in a clockwise - "P".
We believe the result
The number of "L" subtract "P" divide by 10 and multiply by 100%.
- More than 30% - is completely dominated by the left hemisphere.
- 10-30% - slightly dominated by the left hemisphere.
- -10% - + 10% - slightly dominant right hemisphere.
- Less than 10% - is completely dominated by the right hemisphere.
Fact № 4. 90% of our personality is determined by culture
What does it mean?
When we are born, our brains evaluates the environment and concludes that what we should be. 70% of the neurons in a child falls on the prenatal period and in the first 15 months of life, the brain weight increases by more than 30%. The sharp increase is due to the production of new bonds formed between cells.
For two years the human brain will generate more than 100 trillion connections, which is approximately two times more than the entire adult life. And then begins the rejection: communication begin to die at a rate of up to 100 thousand in the second. It is believed that in this way the brain adapts to the world around us. What is left - this is us.
Environmental influences easily seen when the Western (Aristotle focused on the person) and east (Confucian, which stresses the outside world) cultures.
During the classical experiment Attending holistically versus analytically: Comparing the context sensitivity of Japanese and Americans subjects were from Japan and the United States offered to see a few 20-second animated videos about the underwater world. When study participants were asked what they remember most, Japanese We begin to describe the context ( "body of water looked like a pond"), in contrast to the students of the American University, which usually begins with a description motley, fast and catchy fish in the foreground.
This confirms the fact that the perception, memory and thought processes really depend on our cultural characteristics.
Bad if such a strong influence of culture?
Unlikely. Man can not exist without culture and can not develop without its influence. Today we are not only limited by the environment in which they were born. Thanks to the Internet, travel, books, movies and more, we have a unique opportunity to dive into other worlds, explore them from the inside.
Absorbing foreign culture, we are developing differently and expanding horizons. So we find his own way.
Fact № 5. We inevitably compare themselves with more successful people
What does it mean?
Based on the facts of the past, our becoming largely depends on what we need to be in a certain environment. But this does not mean that individual men and women can not affect us.
With development social networks around were too many examples to follow. Inflyuensery create the image of his "perfect" life, which can be easily mistaken for reality. Because of this, we set unattainable goals and korim themselves for failures in achieving them.
The modern world is more and more often gives us the opportunity to feel like failures.
There was even such a thing as a "perfectionist demonstration" - a tendency to desire to deceive others and seem perfect. Errors or omissions in this same well hidden. This is especially seen in young people, exposing their lives on display in the social networks.
It does not depend on the opinions of others and build your personality?
In a rapidly changing world with an endless stream of information, it is important to understand that all people are different and they are free to act and build their lives the way they want it. Focus on yourself and your best features. You can not allocate its advantages? Ask friends to tell you what they see.
Do not forget, the best quality you can not always pass through the social network. Kindness, courage and compassion are not visible in the photo in Instagram, but they appreciate the people around them. Interesting posts and images may entice, but often they are not real. Remember how you put filters or selects a good background, - on the Internet, we construct our own reality.
Think about how successful people have come to his position. What was decisive for them? Most likely, the answer lies not in the large number of likes, and their belief in themselves, self-development and business.
Based on the data books "Selfies. Why are we obsessed with itself and how it affects us, "Will Storr. How narcissism of the XXI century has changed our lives and what it consist of? Every day from the screens of smartphones have poured streams selfie and motivational posts, and do we want to look in the eyes of the ideal. However, dissatisfaction with himself, the eternal companion makeoversCan drive a person to madness and suicide.
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