How to be alone and not feel guilty
A Life / / December 19, 2019
From time to time each person is useful to pause and briefly left alone with himself. It is necessary to think about something personal, recharge and restart after a short with a vengeance to enjoy life. Such short-term respite necessary for all, without exception.
However, for people prone to introversion they have a much greater value. These moments of solitude mean nearly as much as sleep, food intake and other natural physiological needs. If introvert is not the time to be alone, it often leads to fatigue, and depressed mood.
It would seem that everything is simple: if you want to be alone - Stay, no one is prohibited. But here we are faced with a completely different problem that torments a considerable number of people. Name it - a sense of guilt, which only becomes more acute in the event that you are not alone.
human thought, which is gnawing sense of guiltI and so all day stuck at work instead of spending time with loved ones. If I have more, and start to retire, it does cease to see them.
Many people justify the inability to remain alone with himself more mundane. They think that if you add to the list of current tasks and more time for yourself, it razrastotsya to unimaginable sizes and something very important gets lost somewhere.
If you want to make time for a break without a visible damage busy schedule and come on the heels of guilt, that adhere to certain tactics, which we describe below.
Begin by taking
Your first step - awareness and acceptance. Accept the fact that your little desire to be alone there is nothing wrong and selfish. You will become much less irritable and restless when in pobudet loneliness. So why not invest in yourself in this way? Ultimately, both you and your family, and your career such interruptions will only benefit. However, here we must know when to stop.
To be alone with you - does not mean to spend the weekend, for example, playing video games.
This pastime is hardly a complete reboot. It is rather unproductive indulgence that you will encounter again the idea that the more useful it would be to spend time with family or friends. If you can not control himself and indulges in all serious as soon as possible, it is better for a week highlight a short period of time to be with him one on one.
Make changes to your schedule
Once you realize that in the time alone there is nothing wrong, go to the next step. He is to work every day on my schedule. No need to overhaul its remake, enough to make a few small changes. We offer you five strategies to be followed in order to properly maintain the balance of "close people - loneliness." You can follow any one of them or a combination of several.
1. Wake up early
In anticipation of the indignant cries, we hasten to reassure much. Set the alarm for at least 20 minutes earlier than usual. Use this time to do yoga, do exercise, take a walk or just drink coffee alone with his thoughts. However, if you get up early, it does not mean that you need to go later. The latter can disturb your sleep and trigger insomnia.
Do not put the ambitious goals that can not reach. No need to start the alarm for an hour or two earlier than usual. You may be simply useless so long for solitude every day. And do not torment yourself if you can see clearly that it is not getting enough sleep. Perhaps this strategy is you just do not fit.
2. Begin or end time alone
Start the morning or end the working day in some cozy cafe - not a bad idea. You will have about half an hour to be alone without any particular need to interact with the people around. This time, you can dispose of the benefit: read a book, make a plan for the next day or think about how to spend the coming weekend.
If the ability or desire to go to different institutions you do not, it is rational to dispose of time that you spend on the road. If you live close to work - walk on foot. If a long way, try as an experiment to abandon the use of a smartphone or even listening to music, to relieve a little brain.
3. Train alone
Use training as a chance to be alone with his thoughts. Regularly go out for a jog or a walk, visit a swimming pool or gym. This helps to keep yourself in good physical shape and at the same time significantly improve the emotional state.
Some people like to listen to music while jogging: good soundtracks set the tone and mood for the whole day. Some, on the contrary, instead of constantly repeating playlist prefer to immerse themselves in their own thoughts. Here the choice is yours: try both and then decide what you prefer.
If you are doing some kind of team sport or have a permanent sports partner, the Build your training schedule so that at least once a week to engage independently.
4. Replace meaningless breaks really nice
Rather than during operation without unnecessarily distracted by checking e-mail or tape on social networks, select yourself a little time for a truly enjoyable experience. Flip through a magazine, to which still can not get around, write a post in a personal blog, chat with friends or eat something delicious.
5. Regularly Take time to relax
Sometimes it seems that the whole world is up in arms against you. Finally, do not lose heart will help the idea that somewhere in your schedule is your personal time.
There is especially difficult if you are a family man and domestic affairs just covered you with his head. Try to negotiate with someone in the family to replace you for a while. When the energy is running out, it is useful even a short break, during which you can relax.
If your family has young children, make a simple schedule of when and who will feed them, bathe, put to bed and read a bedtime story. This will help avoid conflict and a whole bunch of the same time allow each of the partners to find time for themselves. And hardly after that you will have to torment the guilt.
see also
- How to learn to be alone →
- An introvert or an extrovert? Find out who you really are →
- Lessons for an introvert who wants to become a leader →