As a sandwich with ham help to find the meaning of life
A Life / / December 19, 2019
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Mark Manson (Mark Manson)
Author of the bestseller "The subtle art pofigizma: a paradoxical way to live happily", blogger, entrepreneur.
You know the big question. The question that we have not pondered again, unable to sleep at night. The question that is equally surprising and terrified our helpless before him crazy. Why are we here? What is the sense of life?
Luckily, I found the answer when I was in the gym this morning. I'm sure it's a ham sandwich. I have an explanation.
Before you ask, what is the meaning of life, we need to understand the other, perhaps more subtle and important issue.
What is the most sense?
This question anyone stumped his philosophical depth. Therefore, a minute's talk about a ham sandwich. It is important.
How is it - for anything mean anything? People have a need to give meaning to everything that happens in their lives.
When my mother hugged me, which means that she loves me. When the chief praises me, it means that I work well. Tomorrow will be sunny - so I can put on their favorite T-shirt. As you can see, the meaning - it is the relationship that our mind connects the two vital experience or, for example, events. Happens X, behind him - Y. In our understanding of the cause of X Y.
Our head seems to sense explanation of the madness that is happening in the world. This is an important process: It helps us to anticipate what will happen next, and keep your life under control.
But let's be honest with ourselves: the meaning - it is a very thought-conditional category. Fifty people can witness the same events, but after explaining it fifty different ways. That's why so many politicians argue with each other. Why witnesses in court as unreliable. Why do friends sometimes seem almost enemies, because they only look at things differently.
We take for the same two different semantic links:
- Cause and investigation. You kick the ball, it rolls. You're talking to a friend that he had terrible hair and get a slap. Doing X, you can be sure that will be followed by Y. We all need a cause-effect relationship to survive. They help to look into the future. Learn from the past. They involved building up the parts of our brain that are responsible for the logic. Science, for example, is a continuous search for an increasing number of cause-and-effect relationships.
- Better and worse. There is better than starving. Making money is better than being poor. Sharing is better than stealing. These semantic categories are associated with the nature of our values - what we believe the most important and useful in life. But they are the result of those parts of the brain responsible for emotions. In general, what makes us feel good, we perceive as good or better.
These two varieties are necessary for meaningful survival. More than one thousand years, the people needed to know and remember the signs that indicate changes in the weather, the place where you can find food. In addition, they needed to understand how to earn the recognition, acceptance and respect in his tribe. So, semantic links - it is a natural tool for motivation.
Evolution made sure that each of us was doing his job. The meaning is the basis of all our actions.
When a certain circumstance occurs to a person of great importance (for example, his child is sick or hungry), he is ready to move mountains to everything fell into place. Some people are willing to go further and to give his life for the sake of something meaningful for them. For example, in the name of faith.
And in those situations where we feel a lack of meaning in life when nothing seems important when there is no clarity as to how and why certain things happen to us, we do not do anything. Just sit on the couch, press the button on the remote, watch different nonsense and complain that do not show no entries.
That's the rub (I promise now move on to talk about a ham sandwich): semantic content - these are the flowers of life, which we must cultivate. The meaning of life is not outside of our consciousness. This is not a universal cosmic truth that is just waiting to her uncovered. Her discovery will not be a moment when you shout "Eureka!", And life will change forever.
To get to the meaning, we need action. Continuous and sequential search.
The presence of sense - it is water for our psychological health. Without it, our mind, our heart smorschatsya and die. At the same time, like water, it flows away through his fingers: the fact that a few years ago, it was important today, it does not matter. And tomorrow, and it will change. Without stopping, grain of the meaning of life is necessary to seek and find, one by one.
By and large, the meaning of life is to create a sense.
How to give meaning to their actions
1. Solve problems
What are they seriously, the more value they see in overcoming them. The process - finding ways to make the world a little better, since the wiring repairs in the house of my mother and ending with complex work on a completely scientific breakthrough in the field of physics.
But here it is important not to be picky, be selective. If you think about how we are insignificant in comparison with the vast universe, we can come to the following conclusion: it is better not to do anything before you do not have an opportunity to save the world. But this is misleading. There are so many small everyday problems that need attention. With them, you need to start.
2. helping others
According to studies, our sense of self is closely related to the quality of relationships with other people. And the best way to establish them - offer people assistance. Another well-known fact: many people nicer to give than to receive. Here he is, the way become a little happier.
This holds for our mind: helping others gives us a feeling of fullness of meaning of life. "Some people feel better because I live" - this idea is to push forward action.
Goals - it's a trap?
Some find meaning helps setting goals. They want a corner office, a big car, fashionable shoes. It is for them a reason to get up in the morning, killed on the job, wait until tomorrow.
But the goal - it's a double edged sword. You have to be careful. Goals motivate. But there is a problem in themselves, they are empty and conventional. "Why?" - that's a matter of setting goals must begin. Only the achievement of meaningful goals will bring lasting happiness and satisfaction.
Ever seen a star athlete in retirement? Or millionaires who have earned at least almost all the money in the world, but became unhappy, not knowing what to do with my life?
Objectives mislead us: we see in them the meaning, until we reach them, but it disappears as soon as we get the desired.
Therefore, striving to make a million dollars to buy a huge SUV or shoot for a magazine cover - surface. Such achievements will not bring the full sense of happiness.
By the way, goals You do not always have to be big and ambitious. Take, for example, a ham sandwich. I sat down to write this stuff hungry. This is a problem for me. But I promised myself to finish before the case, then make yourself a sandwich. It gave the time that I spent on the article, an additional meaning. Maybe my wife was hungry, I would have done for her sandwich. Remember, you need to help people to feel reasonably useful.
What is the sense of life? At the moment, for me it is a ham sandwich. And for you?