How to deny and refuse so as not to leave an unpleasant "pellet"

Refuse and refuse - two difficult tasks that each of us has cause unpleasant feeling somewhere. "Pit of the stomach," I know for myself that when I come It is tempting, but not suitable for some reason, proposals, each time it is necessary to make a choice how to accept or refuse to receive offers. Vdovoyne difficult, if it is necessary to refuse someone, whose materials and the level of training does not meet the expectations / requirements of the project (because "a good man - not a profession"). How could deny and refuse to neither party dialogue did not feel negative after a difficult conversation? Here are a few recommendations from their own experience.

1. Always be polite and firm. If you do not fit the person or project in a polite, but clearly stated form it. Do not be afraid of the phrase "I, unfortunately, does not fit this format of cooperation." For 6 years of work in the different companies, start-ups and projects have never seen a situation where honest and reasoned refusal with an explanation of the reasons would be accepted by the "hostility." You do not fit the person or project - refuse, and do not have to tolerate and adapt (to finally understand it still is not "yours," and the time and effort has to be spent on "bonding cups," which will "fight" more than once, while you suffer, if only not to deny / not refuse).

2. Do not tighten with refusal. If freelancers usually determined with "suitable / not suitable" for a day or two in the company for some reason decided to pull the longer, the higher the position, and the more complex the structure of the company. Disclaimer gives certainty. Did not work out, it does not fit, no time, no job, no need someone with these skills - report it, do not hold the opposite side of the negotiations in "limbo" state. Chances are good that someone is counting on you, hoping for cooperation, and you're just stealing from him time and opportunity to be found for days and weeks of waiting for another job or project.

3. If you have a reason for refusal, which can be voice - tell them. The reason such as "you do not speak about" should not be spoken (even if it was she, and served as the basis for the refusal), at least for ethical reasons. A man she hardly will change, but about you also dissolve the rumors, saying that you "think you are about yourself, God knows what."

But the reason "we can not take you, because instead of 2 years of project work you only have 1 year of experience in freelance: you must still work on the skills of project management "- is something that can and should be said candidate. Man work on them and even more grateful you will (unless such applicant is adequate).

If you are a freelancer or an entrepreneur, and you just impose a too low price of services, lack of payment or onerous conditions - do not be afraid to say it: the market and your colleagues will eventually be grateful for what motivated refusals and knowledge of the value of their services to clear the market of "globular" and fans of "saving" on someone else's work.

4. If someone can recommend a return, be sure to do it. I have repeatedly had situations when to seek transfers or content services people just "did not fit" into the overall schedule of the workload. However, there are familiar copywriter, content manager or "SEOs" who just need a client. If I am willing to recommend such a man - always and I do: and the party that was refused leave satisfied with a potential contact, and (what hide) Statement "in karma" can be added advantages :) But it is not even in karma, and that you can offer an alternative to the competent person who is forced to refuse. The only caveat: You can only recommend, in whose adequacy, skills and responsibilities you are sure at least 90%.

5. Always give yourself 12 hours for thinking about failure. Even if you know from the outset that the project will not fit, "oversleep" this idea, take the final decision on a fresh mind. Sometimes what at first you "is not appropriate," after weighing many "pros" and "against" the proposal may be, with which you still agree.

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