Why is it important to thank each other's domestic affairs
Relations / / December 19, 2019
Most couples chores anyway separated. Partners aloud or agree on who is responsible for what, or over time, there is a tacit understanding of where whose area of responsibility.
Voluntary separation cases may greatly simplify the lives of all family members. But there is in this approach, and fly in the ointment: when we start over again to perform some work on the house, it quickly becomes our responsibility. And since this is our duty, we are expected to perform it for granted things that requires no gratitude. But we all want to see that our work is appreciated.
Thanks and relationship satisfaction
scientists have suggestedCosts and satisfaction in close relationships: The role of loss-gain framing several pairs to talk about how they shared the household chores. The subjects were asked to answer whether they feel gratitude to the partner for the execution of their duties and how they are satisfied with the relationship.
It was found that the greater the gratitude of the study was obtained from its partners for solving everyday issues, the more pleasure they engaged
housekeeping. For most subjects, the need to do the bulk of the housework means less satisfaction with relationships. However, this negative effect disappears as soon as people began to see and hear that their work appreciated.In another study found that those who feel gratitude to the partner would receive from relationships more fun, if you could do at home even more than if they took off with part duties. Perhaps the fact that more work means more to them gratitude, which improves their mood and increases self-esteem.
Of course, there is no guarantee that if you start thanking your partner in life for everything that he or she does at home, your partner will rush to fulfill their (and maybe yours) domestic duties with redoubled zeal. But definitely worth a try.
On the other hand, the expectation of something not only weakens the gratitude, but can cause a negative. Perhaps you do not realize that some things have long since become the responsibility of your second half. And so it will be as long until you hear the growl of his own under a light bulb, "Why it has not yet been changed? We are you always doing this! "
Like to thank
Think of all the charges, large and small, which lie on the shoulders of each of you. When you last spoke to each other thanks for ironing shirts or nailed shelf? Try not to miss even the smallest things: taking out the trash, laundry, paying bills. Without these details of your life would have collapsed.
Pay attention to the attendants thank you, formally pronounced, but do not carry almost no feelings. Very often they can be heard after dinner or supper. They are so brought to the automatism that no sincere gratitude to them long ago left.
Chances are you're thinking: "But it is physically impossible to give thanks for every little thing! The more so because it is his / her duty. " Now imagine what you will feel if you suddenly say thank you for what you do from day to day.
No need to thank everyone once and for all. Just do not forget to do it more often and from the heart. In fact, thanks for every sneeze can cause you have to start to wait Thanks for any occasion. It devalues your desire to attend.
If you really want to impress your partner, do not thank him for what he does, but for what he is.
If you get it, it may not only be doing your part at home more readily, but also begin to respond to notice and appreciate what you do. Your gratitude will come back to you a hundredfold.