How to establish communication with strangers, or a few words about the benefits of the "surface" of conversations
Tips Relations / / December 19, 2019
Do you like to go to different events and as a result find themselves silent type, standing in a remote corner of the lively conversation, silently sipping his coffee? The ability to carry on a conversation during the various communications (and even quite strangers) is nowadays the practical skills from the category of Must Have. Therefore, below we will look at some tips that will help you to "talk" and find a common theme in almost any company.
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What is it for? You will be able to find a common language with the right people and make new contacts. Yes, you may initially feel not very fun, but remember that the issues that we present below, can lead to more interesting conversations. Their goal - not to become best friends or get yourself a new client on the spot (although, of course, it is nice when it happens instantly, but usually it is not). The purpose of these mini-conversations is to find common ground with someone in the future will help you to continue the conversation with the general mutual interest.
Actually carry on a conversation very simple, if you learn to listen and ask appropriate probing questions that will appear in your dialogue. All you need to do is to prepare some questions in advance. If a person is willing to go to the contact, you can continue to actively participate in the conversation.
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When the person with whom you are dealing, not actively engaged in a conversation with you, this is a red flag for you to say to yourself, "Okay, this is not one of the people I needed, it was time to move on and meet someone still".
Finally, during this first contact, each person decides whether to continue contact with the person on. During these small conversations people are just forming their opinion about who you are, how you are competent and whether they trust you.
Why not talk about work? In fact, talk about work and business is very limited: it can be trained, what people are doing at the moment, the big events of the life of the company or project and so on. These conversations do not work well and poorly establish a connection between people. There are people you may know for many years and never hear them talk about the work. Or suppose that your interlocutors - retired or are not interested in acquiring new customers. If we talk about your work too much, you run the risk of tiring the other participants in the call, for example, too much of a "jargon". Watch for signals from your buddies. How do they react to the conversation with you? They are going to find someone else and secretly dream to get rid of you? Listen and if they understand what you are saying? Did you overload them with information that they do not need? Do you turn the dialogue into a monologue, not giving others a chance to share their ideas or ask questions?
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Another important skill is the ability and time to finish any topic and try to always be right and prove it. By and large, we should value the opinion of others, and recognize that this is not so important - to win every argument.
When it comes to small talk first, do not try to impress everyone with something clever every time you open your mouth. Your words may be forgotten, but it is how you make people feel, they will remember.
And now, back to the practical part. Below are four questions, which we hope will help you in difficult times, when you're trying to figure out what to say and do not know.
What do you do when you are not in work or activities such as this?
This question stimulates the interlocutor to what to talk about their hobbies and interests. And it's a great way to add a damped enthusiasm for conversation.
Are you going anywhere this summer?
This question can lead to conversations about family, identify interests, and if you want to talk about travel, it is a sure way to keep the conversation interesting.
How do you become what began?
For some, the path to the place and the work that they are doing today can be a very interesting history. For your interlocutor it is an excellent question and the opportunity to reconsider its success story and talk about what motivates them.
What is your relation to this event?
This question can reveal mutual contacts and usually leads to a more interesting and useful answers than if you simply asked: "Were you at this event before?"
Share your ideas on the subject. What questions do you use?