15 tips about the relationship of the Russian classics of the XIX century, relevant and today

1. Be tolerant of small imperfections

But we must be indulgent to little weaknesses; who do not... Who all will understand that everything and forgive.

"War and Peace" (1869), L. N. thick

Do not focus on the small flaws of character or behavior. Perfect people, first of all, boring, and secondly, unreal.

Mary Bolkonskaya - a sample of understanding, gentleness and forgiveness. It is patient and persistent blows the problems that occur on her life's journey. It is these qualities and it attracted Nikolai Rostov.

It is balanced and sober look at the world. A character flaws favorite people María takes almost philosophical calmness, knowing that no one is perfect. And those do not have to be to be loved.

2. Do not postpone happiness for the future

Happiness is not for tomorrow; he does not have, and yesterday; it does not remember the past, not thinking about the future; he has now - and that is not a day, and moment.

"Asya" (1858), I. FROM. Turgenev

Do not miss the happy moments, waiting ideal momentAs did the hero of Turgenev. Because they then can not happen again.

In the story "Asya" N. N. promised his beloved brother, he does not marry her. And while young people love each other, the hero of his word. But even many years later, he could not forget, and do not stop to look suddenly disappeared from his life Asya.

Such feelings he no longer had to any girl. N. N. I made a major mistake in life, having failed to realize that happiness is in front of him. It had only to reach out.

3. Do not manipulate people and play their senses

The less we love a woman,

The better she likes us

So what exactly my thought Eugene.

He was the first of her youth

He was a victim of violent delusions

And unbridled passions.

Habit of life is spoiled,

One at a time fascinated,

Frustrated others

Desire slowly tormented,

Tormented and windy success

Listening in noise and in silence

Murmurs an eternal soul,

Yawn suppressing a laugh:

That's how he killed eight years,

The loss of life the best color.

"Eugene Onegin" (1833), A. FROM. Pushkin

Ignore the person and his feelings - not the best strategy to attract attention. Perhaps this game will seem to someone intriguing in the beginning, but from it is very easy to get tired.

Everyone is familiar with strings that Pushkin Onegin put in the mouth that can attract the attention of women indifference, but few people remember that follows them. The author does not call to hide his feelings in the hope to conquer someone indifference. His hero Eugene Onegin has lost the best years of his life, following this principle, and deprive themselves of the opportunity to strong sincere feelings, what later regretted.

4. Do not blame others for their unjustified expectations

... but where's the Change?

Who? to upbraid infidelity could.

Yes, Chatsky, however, we are brought up, grow:

Habit to be together every day, inseparable

Contact us childish friendship; but then

He moved out, so we thought it boring,

And rarely visited our house;

Then again he pretended lovers,

Demanding and upset!

"Woe from Wit" (1825), A. FROM. Griboyedov

Be honest and talk openly with your partner, if you want to avoid confusion and misunderstandings, because your thoughts are impossible to read.

Griboyedov comedy shows the social and political landscape of the time: how the nobility lived, that his care and what manners reigned. Tangled love line supports the overall satirical attitude. Chatsky, in an effort to educate, and out of the house, and on his return was hoping that everything remains the same, including the ratio of Sophia.

Before leaving, he did not explain to her, did not admit his feelings, but at the same time hoping that she will wait for him faithfully. When it was discovered that the girl has a new boyfriend and Chatsky claims are unfounded, the hero was surprised and offended. But she did not give him any promises, so his claims are baseless.

5. Understand your feelings and be honest with yourself and others

— But you, Kate, do not love Tikhon.

— There is no way not to love! I feel sorry for him really.

— No, you do not love. If it is a pity, because you do not like.

"The Storm" (1860), A. N. Ostrovsky

Before you enter into a relationship, find out what you really want and understand themselves. Happiness starts from within.

Ostrovsky wrote a play in which the old established order is struggling with a rapidly changing world. But the main conflict takes place inside the heroine Catherine, which is followed by the adoption at the time the rules and married Tikhon. Such a life makes it deeply unhappy.

trying please everyoneBut did not get and a good word for it, she lives a life is not the way she wanted. Catherine dreams of a different life and falls in love with Boris - the embodiment of all that which she lacks. And in the end it becomes clear that she does not love her husband, and regret.

6. You should not always listen to the outside

Well, so do not be afraid and do not think of anything more... Today is our day, and none of us will not take it ...

"Oles" (1898), A. AND. Kuprin

Opinion of loved ones and the view from the outside is useful, but what is really going on between the partners, but they know. Therefore, cuts off those who want to have any influence on you and your relationship.

The protagonist of "Olesya" Ivan T. falls in love with a girl whom people believe a witch. She really has a supernatural gift and thinks he connects it with the devil, and so love is unworthy. But despite the fame and warnings superstitious people, the hero sees Olesya nice, albeit an unusual girl.

For him, she goes to church, of which all life was afraid, but he ignores's slander on her and her family. but human anger It is stronger than in the novel - Olesya disappears, leaving only a beloved ornament keepsake.

7. Overcome difficulties together

But love is strongly advised me to stay with Marya Ivanovna and be her protector and patron.

"The Captain's Daughter" (1836), A. FROM. Pushkin

Do not be shy in front of a problem. External obstacles can be overcome, if we act together and help each other.

Before reunite the protagonists "The Captain's Daughter" Petya and Masha Mironova Grinyov experienced many difficulties. Family Hero was opposed to their marriage, and she wanted to give to another. They separated Pugachovsky rebellion, Peter was on the verge of death. But it is requested Masha has saved him from the gallows. Whatever the complexity of fate is not cast in their direction, and together they overcame them.

8. Look for a man with whom will become the best version of yourself

... but you still do not know, do not know what is the heart of what this girl!

"Crime and Punishment" (1866), F. M. Dostoevsky

Healthy human relationships change for the better. But do it nonviolently. Changes must come from your own desire to be better for a loved one.

The fate of Sonia Marmeladov ambiguous, but her kindness and dedication sings almost every character of "Crime and Punishment." It was her first time Rodion Raskolnikov opened his terrible secret, and she insists that he has removed the sin from the soul, and went into exile. And she come after him. In the new location, all newly loved Sonia, and love for her softened cynical and cold-blooded rebel Rodion and made him a new man.

9. Do not close your eyes to the habits that irritate

Stolz looked at lying Oblomov Oblomov looked at him.

Stolz shook his head and sighed Oblomov.

- You seem to live a lazy? - asked Stolz.

- And what, after all, it's true: laziness, Andrew.

"Oblomov" (1859), I. BUT. Goncharov

Bad habits, which in the beginning of a relationship of concern, will not disappear with time, and the voltage will increase. Talk with your partner, express their concerns, because they do not go away and will only increase.

The image of Oblomov lying on the couch all day, became canonical. Climb the hero made a sudden love for Olga Elias - active and progressive girl. But despite the fact that it went to a marriage, suspiciousness Oblomov and his fear of public opinion still stood in the way of happiness.

And laziness played in their breaking role. His indifference to everything around worried Olga. And with each passing day it became more significant problem, it has not yet led to a break.

10. Do not use people in mercantile purposes

- A Vakula, you're here! Hi! - said the beauty with the same grin that nearly drove Vakula crazy. - Well, a lot nakolyadoval? Uh, a little bag! And of slippers worn by the queen, she took out? Get those slippers, marry! - and she laughed and ran away with the crowd.

Smith stood rooted to the spot in the same place.

"The Night Before Christmas" (1832), N. IN. Gogol

Do not look for material benefits in the relationship, this approach is unlikely to bring happiness. Arrogance and affectedness - is not the best basis to start something serious.

Beautiful Oksana, though loved Vakula, decided use it for their own benefit. In love with the hero he was ready to fulfill any of its desire and even go on the edge of the world, but in the end could not resist her arrogance.

Oksana is when I realized that I lost a blacksmith, regretted his behavior. In Gogol's story ends with repentance girls, who even refused cherevichek, just to be with her beloved. But things might have in a different way.

11. Look for a man who shares your views on the relationship

And what is the mysterious relationship between man and woman? We physiologists know what kind of a relationship. You proshtudiruyte a minute anatomy of the eye: whence here to undertake, as you say, enigmatic look? That's all romanticism, rubbish, rot, art. Come better watch beetle.

"Fathers and Sons" (1862), I. FROM. Turgenev

Do not try to draw as to who is not ready for them or resists. If your point of view is not the same in matters of love, the union will bring only disappointment in the end.

"Fathers and Sons" - a novel about the difficult relationship between the generations. They are separated by a huge gap, and family members often do not hear do not understand each other. Yevgeny Bazarov - the new man. The author drew his nihilist who puts reason above the heart, and look down on people's feelings.

But with the advent of his life Anna Odintsov Bazarov changed. As it struggles love and composure. Anna is also drawn to Eugene, but she knows that will not be happy with him, because he can not give her peace of a family atmosphere.

12. Avoid those who are constantly looking for a cure for boredom

I often ask myself why I persevere love of a young girl, I do not want to seduce, and which will never marry? What is feminine coquetry ...

To be someone the cause of suffering and joy, not having any positive law - not the most whether it is sweet food to our pride? And what is happiness? Saturated pride.

"Hero of Our Time" (1840), M. YU. Lermontov

People who are in a relationship spurs excitement, quickly bored quiet and measured life. They go in search of adventure or artificially heating up. just do not get bored with them, but the stability can not be expected from the adventurers.

Pechorin - a lover of thrills. He steals the beautiful Bela from his home because he was bored in the fortress of the Caucasus. She is deeply unhappy in captivity, and the hero is trying by all means to arrange it yourself. And when he did succeed and the girl awakens the senses, Pechorin falls into a depression. The goal is achieved, the girl he is no longer of interest.

A similar story is happening, and with Princess Mary. He uses it to cause jealousy among the married and in love with his faith. And when Mary confesses her love for him, Pechorin remains indifferent. The motif of the hero one: it is driven by the search for adventure.

13. Pass by the side of those who play and make jealous

"I flirt, I have no heart, I'm actor's nature - she said to him one day in my presence - as well! So post your hand Well, I stick a pin in it, you will be ashamed of this young man, you will be hurt, but still you, Mr. truthful man, so good to laugh. " Looshin blushed, she turned away, bit his lips, but it ended up that framed hand. She pricked him, and he began to laugh for sure ...

"First Love" (1860), I. FROM. Turgenev

Does not require proof of love from those you are not interested and do not agree to such demands. Tests attempts cause jealousy and undercover games have nothing to do with feelings. Their purpose - entertainment, so it is unlikely that they will have some logical end.

The young hero of the story "First Love" Volodya falls in love with the daughter Zinaida neighbors. Girl is cool with him, shows his affection. She invites Volodya home, where he met with a lot of fans who are waiting for, and when it will make a choice in anyone's favor. But she did not hurry: she plays with them.

Gets and Volodya, who naively performs its whim, more like an extravagance. She wants to make it his page, then asked to jump from a height. But no matter what he did, Zinaida still did not share his feelings, but she loves another.

14. Do not look for happiness in a love triangle

If it is true that you can love two people? I do not understand. You do not have two, and some love, but there is a play on words; love love can be one, and it I love my husband.

"Who is to blame?" (1846), A. AND. Herzen

Invasion of lasting relationships hardly prinoset joy at least one side of a love triangle. Not for nothing do they say that someone else's misfortune happiness can not be built.

Krutsiferskih family lived in peace and quiet while their house is not entered eccentric Belts. He showed signs of attention to his wife why she is also interested in the guest. The result was an assignation in which the Belts confessed his love to her. Krutsiferskaya, unable to withstand the onslaught of the self-confident man, ready to fall into his arms, but their meeting is interrupted by another character.

Full of experiences, a woman falls ill, her husband, did not know the causes of the disease, is worried about his wife and finds solace at the bottom of the bottle. A Beltov leaves town. Family life Krutsiferskih broken, and the main character disappears.

15. Beware of people who put your comfort above the rest

Here, as I see, you can spend time with pleasantness. I love kindness, and I confess, more like it if I please from the heart, and not that of interest. A daughter of the mayor's very pretty, and the mother so that more can be... No, I do not know, but for me, right, like that kind of life.

"The Government Inspector" (1836), N. IN. Gogol

Inflated self-esteem and the desire to get out of life is a pleasure - a sure sign that before you a man who does not want to break your comfort for the sake of someone else. If the relationship will create inconvenience for him, he easily abandon them.

In the play "The Government Inspector" love line takes is not important, the most Gogol stresses the character of his hero. Khlestakov - a rogue who loves only himself. He tends to a comfortable life and do not hesitate dirty tricks. If needed lie for their own benefit, and he is not morgnot eye.

For women Khlestakov same. That only is the scene where he is a difference of a few lines does offer first Mary and then her mother, undeterred by a married provisions of the latter. And all because he is not going to get married at all, and just wants to get out of a precarious situation.