What problems in communication will lead your love to your phone

Many young people do not part with your smartphone for a minute:

• 93% millenialov use the phone in bed;
• 80% go with him to the bathroom;
• 43% get it, stopping at a red light;
• 66% of young people check their phone as soon as waking up in the morning;
• almost 10% of waking up during the night to check the messages.

Smartphones are constantly keeping us in touch, entertain and distract notifications when we have nothing to do. And most importantly - provide a convenient alternative to a conversation face to face. We can correspond with via SMS and e-mail, instant messengers and social networks. But there is a danger that because of this we are missing important aspects of communication.

What are the challenges facing the constant use of a smartphone

1. misunderstanding

The correspondence does not convey all that we want to say.

In normal conversation, words we said to tell only a small part of the meaning. After all, there is also the body language, tone of voice, facial expression.

James Roberts, a professor of Baylor University and author of Too Much of a Good Thing: Are You Addicted to Your Smartphone?

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Sending an email or posting a tweet, we lose all the non-verbal component and send the bare text. As a result, it can get a lot of misunderstanding and resentment. And all because the reader does not have the most non-verbal sources of information that would help him to correctly understand the meaning of what was said.

2. The fear of an awkward conversation

Sometimes it is appropriate to type a message instead of a short personal conversation. But more and more people inform their friends and relatives about the weddings and funerals through the social network and transferred to a text format solution to all major issues. Phones make it easy to discard any potentially awkward conversation. And we're learning to fully communicate.

Some people do not have the courage to carry on complex conversations face to face, and they do not develop these skills.

James Roberts

According to one survey, 40% of young people chose the text messages as the preferred way to communicate with others. Millenialov 33% said that it is better to communicate with a person face to face.

3. Inability to carry on a conversation, and irritation of the interlocutor

Most of us are familiar with fabbingom, even if not heard the term before. Fabbing - it is a way of ignoring the interlocutor: when you speak to a man, and he buried himself in his smartphone.

Surely everyone has a friend who is in talk time constantly checking news feed or messages. This is not only annoying, but also indicates that a person is difficult to maintain a conversation.

When some people feel insecure, they immediately look at your smartphone as a lifeline. They do not understand that sometimes awkward pauses and awkward lull in the conversation - this is something you should work on.

James Roberts

89% of Americans say that during the last social interaction, they use the phone, and 82% admitted that it hurt conversation. This was said MIT professor Sherry Torkl during the promotion of his book "Restoration of communication: Talk force in the digital age» (Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age). In Russia the situation is not much better.

4. Loss of empathy and joy of communicating

In 2012, we conducted a study that compared the talk in pairs strangers. On a table next to some participants was a smartphone, next to the other - a laptop. Responding to questions about the interlocutor after the experiment, the group with the phone were less positive and felt that their conversations They were less significant.

In itself, the presence of phone undermines the quality of the conversation.

James Roberts

Other observations have confirmed that the presence of the phone can make us feel less empathy for the other party. We delve into the less conversation, lose the ability to empathize and care for the other. It is also proved that fabbing has a negative impact on satisfaction with the relationship.

5. Lack of parental attention

Watching how parents behave when dining with children, experts have noticed that many barely interact with their children. They fed the child what he asked, without looking at him and not answering him.

Parents were absorbed by smartphones. They recognized that it is difficult to switch between reading and child endless news. They felt uncomfortable when their children were torn from this activity. And as you know, if the parent is not paying child enough attention in childhood, in adolescence, "leave me alone" will speak already a child.

6. Children do not acquire important social skills

The opposite situation: a baby difficult to handle, so the parent gives him the electronic device. He calms down, the conflict is smoothed, and mom or dad are also less stress. But the question arises: where children receive social skills and emotional experience, if instead of interaction with parents they play with your smartphone?

I assume that some of the "difficult" children at higher risk of problems in behavior or development, often provide electronic devices.

Jenny Radescu, a pediatrician, an expert on child behavior

Every child needs and their temperament. And what he learns from personal contact is extremely important. In particular it should well recognize the very non-verbal cues and emotions, as mentioned at the beginning. Gadgets without assistants.

What should I do to prevent smartphone supplant live chat

• Clean out your smartphone when you're at the table. A good idea when a company or family dine: Put all your gadgets in one pile and assign punishment to the one who first grabbed by the smartphone. For example, if you're in a cafe with friends, albeit at fault pays for all.
• Ignore messages and phone calls when you are personally talking to someone. Most likely, it is more important than talking, you are now conducted. In most cases, can be answered later.
• Install an app that helps keep track of how much time you spend on the phone. For example, BreakFree shows how long and in what applications you are sitting, your analyzes depending on the level of and in the playful form gives advice. Also in the application can be configured off the internet and phone calls at a certain time. And there is a parental control function: setting BreakFree on the child a smartphone, it is possible to trace how it is linked to the gadget.

After taking action, you feel that you get more pleasure from intercourse, and that the other was pleasant to do business with you.