How not to quarrel over money: tips for different occasions
Get Rich Relations / / December 19, 2019
Relationship with partner
By and large, a person with whom you conduct a common household, the only one really need to discuss material issues. Most often, this category includes husbands and wives, cohabitants. But there are also non-standard cases, such as when the common house of the two sisters live. There will also be a reasonable approach to financial relations from the perspective of partnership.
When money is in excess, a row of them are unlikely to occur. Therefore, we consider a situation where expenses have to plan. There are a few steps that will help ensure the necessary costs and eliminate a large part of the reason for the quarrel.
accounting costs
To allegations of in a waste go to the substantive discussion of the family budget, it is necessary for a few months to record all expenses, dividing them into groups. You can do this in Excel, or in a table relevant applications.
analysis of expenditure
Collect all of the records of both partners expenditures. Your goal is not to find out who is more or mindlessly spending money. You need to determine how much you spend. At the same time find out what is the cost of prime necessity that - necessary but not vital expenditure, and it is reasonable to include in the entertainment column.
During the show even a little empathy: what you feel silly buying for a partner can be an important requirement. But he must be really rational arguments in support of its position.
Long-term budget
Properly compiled financial plan It helps provide all expenses and excludes a situation where due to purchase of new shoes you have nothing to eat. It is necessary to forecast costs, moreover, they should not exceed revenues.
The budget you allocate money so that was enough for everything you need and more is left to pleasant spending.
Family monetary fund
There are several ways to accumulate family money. Some of them help reduce the number of quarrels over finances, while others only increase the odds. However, there is no universal recipe, you need to focus on your specific couple.
Total budget
You add up the money in a drawer nightstand or a common bank account, and each spends as much as needed. This method is not as bad, if each of you will have to stick to a disciplined budget and avoid unnecessary spending. Otherwise quarrels can not be avoided.
However, if both of you are able to control costs in the framework of the financial plan, the total budget of the work. If at the end of the month in the nightstand will any amount, it can be divided in half. This money each spend at its discretion or to postpone a major purchase personal.
separate budget
Each of you gets a paycheck and spend it on their own, and for general purchases you pay on line. Not the best plan is to avoid quarrels over money. First, the salary may be different, secondly, can be different appetites. And the food basket from week to week, repeated incomplete. If you are not prepared to divide the shelf in the refrigerator and put the two counters for electricity, fight for equal contribution will be difficult.
Another thing, when the equal distribution of spending you do not really need. If you have a trusting relationship and you know that your partner will not hide part of the revenue, the budget ideologically transformed into a common, easy money is stored in different wallets.
shared budget
Each of the pair making a part of their salary to the fund from which the money will be taken for public use. It can be an equal amount, or a percentage of revenue. Exactly how much will need to total costs - it is clear from the budget that you have made previously.
Accordingly, from the collection means are in foods communal, household chemicals. Remaining on the personal card money can be spent on hobbies and entertainment, without fear of judgment.
Any kind of good budget if both paired adequate and may agree. But even a perfect plan can be broken, for example, the opinion of one of the spouses, that all the money partner - his money.
Relationships with parents
with parents financial relations depend on what kind of material they are taking part in your life.
You are younger than 20 years, and you are a dependent of the parent
With opinion parents over to where their earnings go, have to be considered. However, there are different options. If you give a certain amount of pocket money, it is better to stipulate in advance that you can spend it anywhere.
Together and have to decide what you do with the money from your podrabotok. You can agree that you spend them at its discretion. But if the parents salaries barely enough for things essentials that you may want to contribute to the family budget.
In short, as long as you are not an independent financial units, money matters will have to decide at the negotiating table. Moreover, the arguments in the conversation is better to use rational, rather than emotional.
You are fully provide for themselves
If you are not financially dependent on their parents and do not ask them for money with or without discussing the question with them separationAnd not where you spend your income. Just stop to raise the topic of your paycheck, you're old enough to do so.
Do you live with your parents
If you live with parents, quarrels over money from time to time will occur. Parents can easily assume that you will not do without their help and advice, and generally this is true.
To the reasons for the dispute over money as little as possible, be sure to participate in the general expenditure on agriculture and to pay its share of the communal and products. And your parental contribution and are not necessarily interchangeable. If you, for example, bitcoin MainyuWhile parents dine by candlelight, the electricity bill is still on you.
You will not take money from their parents, but living in their apartment or use their property
Much depends on the relationships in your family. But there are a million stories in which the official owners of apartments considered it possible to come at any time without a call, to rummage in things, to control spending, children's behavior and generally behave as if they own not only flat, but also all its inhabitants with giblets. Here again crucial question of separation from their parents, because such behavior on their part inadmissible.
If in this situation leave the apartment - is not an option, it is necessary to try to conclude an agreement with the parents tenancy.
use standard document. Parents can write there what they want from you in return for the use of the apartment, though not material, you - the conditions of the visit.
Do not expect that quarrels will cease immediately. Most likely, the first you will listen to the flow of accusations of all mortal sins, and that you do not love Mom. But your main task - to try to explain that the situation is not quite normal. However, one should be prepared for the fact that you can at any time ask to move out, because the apartment is still not yours.
Relationships with friends
There are several cases in which the money can come between you and your friends.
debts
Folk wisdom says that you should not lend money to friends and take them on loan. In fact, it does not affect the relationship, if you follow the agreement and return the money on time. And it is logical to expect the same from friends.
If you for some reason, more expensive than others, but you know that he did not return the debt, listen to the people's wisdom and do not lend to him.
general business
Again we turn to folk wisdom, which bans have common cause with friends. She did not come out of nowhere: comrades do often quarrel over the business and even become enemies, because they can not something to share.
If you're willing to take the risk, do not neglect the services of a lawyer who correctly will strengthen your business relationships on paper, prescribe the risks and responsibilities of the partners for different occasions. Even if you are extremely trust each other, the documents will keep all of you from the temptation to risk friendship for the sake of personal gain.
Unfair division of expenses
In many companies, agreed to pay at a time for each other and share the expense equally, that the whole fits into the requirements of etiquette. But the harsh reality makes adjustments: revenues friends can be different. And if one ordered a lobster, and the other - a salad of crab sticks, then the separation of the account is also equally may have questions.
Not necessarily hour sitting with a calculator to calculate the share of each. But the bill still better to divide fairly.
Total
Money are often the cause of contention between people, but there is no single right way to get rid of the differences.
The main thing that should be taken into account: the quarrel over money is not necessarily related to income and expenses, even though it sounds a little paradoxical.
Money - it is a powerful instrument of control, a way to feel safe. It is possible that the husband does not allow his wife to spend money on a barber because he's afraid that it will become more beautiful and go away from it, and parents through the advice and reproaches express their love.
Therefore, if algorithmization financial processes did not help, and quarrels did not become less, you need to dig deep into issues, perhaps with the help of a psychologist.