How to forgive a loved one and begin again to trust him

Trust - is the feeling of comfort and total security with a man. If you lose this feeling, you first need to determine whether your relationship is worth to spend on their time and energy. Restore trust between people is possible only under the condition that both genuinely want it.

If your relationship has a chance and you believe in happy future, Should try to establish them. The main thing - to find the strength to forgive someone. These tips will help.

1. Understand that it takes time for forgiveness

It may take months or even years. If a person is already a few days hoping you will forget everything, so he does not realize how much pain you caused.

However, if you close really wants to correct the situation, you should not constantly remind him of the slip. Make it clear that you need time to think and sort out their feelings. And if you manage to forgive him, do not take offense as an ace in the hole, with which you can manipulate that person in the future.

2. Wait a sincere apology

If a loved one has made a mistake and realizes his guilt, he will ask for your forgiveness. A sincere apology does not sound like this: "I'm sorry, but that it was only once." These are the words of one who is trying to justify his behavior, and put himself in a favorable light.

Such an apology or even an attempt to accuse you of this situation is unlikely to make you believe in the sincerity of feeling guilty. After hearing from a loved one, "Come on, this is nonsense", you harbored a grudge deep inside, and someday it will break out.

A sincere apology - it's taking responsibility, remorse for your pain and desire to improve.

3. Ensure predictability and Human Reliability

Trust in the relationship stands on three pillars: the predictability, reliability, and confidence. To ensure predictability and reliability of a person, you must watch his behavior after committing the error and apologize. If it is not hidden and is not selfish, and open and honest with you, it means he can regain your confidence. If he and after his offense is not fulfilling promises and throw words to the wind, so it is not fully aware of his guilt.

Do not be silent and tell the person what you expect from him.

Jointly determine what needs to be corrected. For his behavior the person responsible, but to discuss the situation should both.

Guilty he should earnestly desire to correct their actions. Proof of this will be his actions, which are aimed at improving your relationship and gain your trust.

4. Focus on the present

After the deception of a loved one or suffered their resentment seems that confidence will not return. Maybe you do not dare to live here and now, and abide in the past or towards the future.

Constantly reminding ourselves of the unpleasant or worrying about the future of your relationship, you will only worsen the situation.

If you find yourself on such thoughts, try to return to the this moment. Look closely at the way a person behaves now. A sober assessment of the current situation and your relationship with him.

5. Take the plunge

Gaining confidence in man - the most difficult and important part of the process of restoring confidence. Confidence - is the belief that people will love and respect you.

To verify this, you need to decide on a bold step and become vulnerable. Then you will understand, I am able to bring you close to there again. Otherwise, you can not be a chance to see if you can trust him completely.

To make sure that you are completely safe with this person, you should give it a certain degree of freedom. If a person truly desires to correct his mistake, he will not hurt you again.