12 questions, on which depend our relationships with others

"What do I expect from others?", "How to love?", "Can I be myself among friends?" - these questions will help determine what place other people in your life.

Andrew Yakomaskin

Teacher and writer. Divided in their inspiring stories group in the social network "VKontakte".

It is impossible to bring success in dealing with people in a single formula. Psychologists, philosophers and poets for hundreds of years trying to explain why relationships play such an important role in our lives. And in response to each of them can find a particle of truth.

In my view, universal way to determine for themselves the importance of the relationship - ask yourself questions that reflect the quality of our attachments. I have collected 12 such questions. Answer them to understand what you have already achieved success, and something to be more work.

1. Whom do I love?

It's not just about romantic love. You can love friends, relatives, even chief, Although this is not easy. The main thing - to determine how much this feeling is present in your life.

2. What do I expect from others?

The quality of our relations is determined by what we expect from others. Do not build false expectations. To do this, you know the closer each person with whom you are driving life.

3. I have enough time to devote to a close?

Time - one of the languages ​​of love. Walks, talks, meetings - even a few moments spent with loved ones, are worth far more than the whole day next to those to whom we are indifferent. Take time to those who appreciate it.

4. How do I react to criticism?

The strong relationship people are not afraid to tell each other the truth, even if it is bitter. To respond adequately to criticism and openly discuss the problem - this is the most important skills in any relationship.

5. What can alienate others around me?

It is important to retain their individuality in communicating with people. And yet, knowing your weaknesses and ways of dealing with them helps to compensate for the shortcomings, when you need it.

6. Who are my friends? Why are we together?

Often people become friends "accidentally": met at school, at university or at work. But the best way to choose friends - to seek common values ​​that bring you and mutually enriching.

7. I'm afraid to be yourself in a circle of friends?

In a healthy relationship we have loved and valued for who we are, with all our strengths and weaknesses. Do not be afraid and do not hide them. You will meet people who will appreciate this unique combination.

8. What I enrich the lives of others?

The best way to strengthen the relationship - to give their time, attention, or help those you care about. The closest people bring into our lives is something special, and it's important to give something back.

9. What I look for in other people?

Decide for yourself what attracts you to the others, what traits, habits, personality traits are particularly important to you. So your choice will be more aware, and you will be able to better appreciate the people who surrounded himself.

10. I often say "yes" when I want to say "no"?

Relationships require honesty. So, and the possibility to deny, if necessary. If a renouncement get a loved one, it will be able to understand you, otherwise - it's just not your man.

11. When people talk to me, I really listen?

In communicating with relatives, our loved ones, we are literally dissolve in communication and do not notice how time flies. Try to keep this level of attention was maintained in every conversation.

12. As I show my love?

As it has been said, love can be directed to any person, and have not only a romantic character. To express their sense of use Five Love Languages: Words, gifts, touch, time and help. Find out what a person values ​​most and share them with just that.