5 simple ways to make grandparents happier
Relations / / December 19, 2019
Psychologist and psychoanalytic psychotherapist Julia Buckingham notes that in old age the feeling of loneliness comes from a man when he is faced with losses, which follow one another. Loss of former health, friends, the usual income and opportunities.
Loneliness becomes particularly acute when an involuntary (sudden or gradual) isolation of the outside world: a person is sick, loses mobility, smaller leaves, most of the time spends alone with himself a.
But even in such a situation can be carried away and take an elderly person. Here are five simple ways.
1. Listen
And do not be angry if your old men for the hundredth time repeating the same thing. In old age, people tend to forget that it was last week, but I do remember, "the same day at the university" and that loved to do early in life.
Perhaps the grandmother suddenly confesses that she loved to draw and wanted to go to St. Petersburg, but did not work out. So ask her to draw a picture, helping grandson with homework from his or organize family travel.
And even grandparents know things about your family, that you will not tell nobody. All this you will understand, if you will only listen. Ask questions, ask again and specify. Show interest.
In some cases, it is not easy and requires persistence, patience, effort, ingenuity. External events in the life of the grandmothers and grandfathers is getting low. But older people always have the events of their inner life, their feelings, memories, experience, perception. Grandparents may feel that you should not talk about it. Reassure family that is not the case.
Julia Buckingham, psychologist, psychoanalytic psychotherapist
2. Learn new
If you live far away, but you can teach grandparents computer skills, be sure to do it. Then we get to chat via video, if it fails to meet frequently. Oh, and for your family this is unusual and interesting.
3. Talk
Talk about their daily lives. I noticed that even unfamiliar elderly neighbor asked, how are you doing? Grandparents is important to be involved, do not leave them on the side of his life. And never hesitate to speak words of support and gratitude.
Not all grandmothers love to knit. Not all grandfather happy running to play dominoes. But you know the desire to relatives. The main thing for them - the attention, which can manifest in different ways.
4. Help at home
And do not wait until you start to try to persuade. You see that the grandmother hard to get the banks from the top shelf? Do it yourself! You can help and quietly: wipe dust, rinse their dishes, fix carpet.
Here the main thing - do not overdo it. If you are being overprotective, a person may feel helpless or think that you consider it as such.
If your family more physically active and do not mind a walk, feel free to take them with him. In parks, cafes, especially in the theater, concerts or a simple family dinner.
5. Monitor the health
It often happens that our family until the last silent about the fact that their is something disturbing, do not want to bother to complain. Unfortunately, such silence leads to the most terrible consequences.
Be attentive to your loved ones, because many ailments and visible from the outside. Always for health and grandparents, but did not suffer from paranoia (read previous point).
When loved ones around, we do not notice. We do not believe something special and we think it will last forever. We know for sure that there is almost a whole life ahead of you, so you can drop in for a visit next week. Well, if not, then at the end of the month. Plenty of time. Believe me, it does not happen.
Grandparents can be a long time to make excuses and to call himself a burden, but you do not believe, and use every opportunity to make their lives saturated and bright.