How to build a strong relationship
Relations / / December 19, 2019
We all like to like. Everyone is nice to be surrounded by people who care, who value relationships. I'm sure each has its own unique story of how he found sidekick. To some it is enough to a single meeting, and some only after many years are able to see a familiar person is something special.
All we define the word "friend" in different ways. In this article I want to share with you the principles that will help you to appreciate loved ones and find a common language with them.
1. Seek First to Understand, and then - to be understood
All who know the name of Stephen Covey, probably learned this principle. He described in some detail in his book "7 Highly Effective People Skillsยป. it became the cornerstone of the relationship for me.
It is easy to build friendships with those with whom you have common interests. But all of us are attracted otherness. So I was always more interested in the people, whose opinion is at odds with mine. Unfortunately, the communication with them has often led to disputes, as happened for one simple reason - I did not try to truly understand a person.
In my opinion, to build a strong relationship, regardless of whether you have a common interest or No, you should always try to find out what the people want, to aspire to what he himself He sees.
Try to exercise care to people in the process of communication, and considered any opinion. If you learn to understand the person, without imposing their point of view, this may be the beginning of a strong friendship.
2. Choose!
IN previous article I have already mentioned the passive role of some people in the relationship. Let me remind you that it is always worth honest answer himself: "You choose, or you choose?".
I never expected that to me formed a queue of interesting people, who will offer a bosom friendship. Each weak link I strengthened meetings, phone calls, letters, to even fleeting acquaintance to check for common ground.
I am sure that everyone in the surroundings there are people who seem interesting. But we somehow embarrassing to know them better. This is not the best strategy for acquiring friends. Choose the people you care about, and do not be afraid to take the first step. Subsequently, your determination will pay off.
3. Be yourself
American singer Aretha Franklin shared in Esquire magazine his experience gained friends, which for many can be a very helpful principle: "The best people were always the ones about someone when you first meet think in my life," Lord, what is this psycho?"".
We are all different, each of us has their own tastes, habits and cockroaches in my head. Sure, there are people who seem to be attractive in all respects, but there are those who, on the contrary, it is surprising oddities. But these oddities are helping many people to find and establish the most robust and reliable relationship. That's because their personality becomes something sacred, and he who is willing to accept it, appreciate it for real.
Do not be afraid to show their unusual: whether vegetarianism, love comics or collection of typewriters. As one of my friends: "My best friend is perfect and it is not discussed. Dot".
4. Be helpful
I as a teacher familiar this principle, because I put it in the foundation of his approach to teaching. In order to attract and retain the people around him, there are three proven ways:
- Inspire.
- Surprise.
- Share.
At a meeting with friends, I try to inspire them to personal history, surprise interesting news to share or a new look for something familiar.
Try each time beforehand to think about than the interest of the interlocutor. It does not matter who it is - an old friend or a potential friend. Each time giving others learn something newWe always discover something new for themselves and strengthen their relationship.
5. The foundation for friendship
This is probably the most controversial of all the principles, because everyone chooses itself, on what should be built long-term relationships. Many make friends at work, someone to share common hobbies, and some quite accidental meeting.
Personally for me a solid foundation for long-term friendly relations is the ability to develop, as well as the pursuit of new knowledge and discoveries. Why?
Firstly, we all want to develop, let each of us chooses to do his own way. This is what is the nature and the level of understanding on which we all want to be helpful to each other.
Second, the desire to become better, to do better and learn something new is a process, not a result. From the moment you choose the path of development, it will be present in your life always.
The artist does not stop even after the hundredth of a picture, as well as a true businessman will always be looking for new ways to use their skills. Therefore friendship is built on this basis, will always find a source for inspiration.
at last
I want to believe that each of us chooses those with whom he goes through life. Sooner or later, the fate of carefully around us people that we truly deserve.
I think you will agree with me, because whatever one most dear to us - memories of the time we spent together. And even if you have these moments becomes only more.
I wish you success!