First Date: 5 Secrets to Success

Once I was in a relationship with a wonderful man and was happy. And then everything collapsed. Not immediately, of course, but more about that some other time. Of course I'm worried. And for a long time. And then I decided that it was time to create a new relationship. And about a month ago I signed up to a dating site.

There was a time when I listened to the endless detached unsuccessful attempts of his friends to "find there is something decent." They often complained that the first meeting with the "amazing men" in the end turn out to be the last. So at the start to this stage, I tried to provide, if not all, then a lot. And to my surprise, each time it is successful!

Solving this problem, I have formulated a few simple rules, and now I want to share them. Let's start with the most important.

1. Be real

Remember the ad? She comes to visit and accidentally hears her waiting young man says to someone on the phone: "No, not yet found. After all, I'm looking for real! "She quickly changes its appearance, it becomes" true "and makes a great impression on the young man. Who would have thought that everything in life is that?

From personal experience

Each time, going to a meeting, I tried to, shall we say, not to gather. Already on the first date, I realized how much was right! I was met by little absorbed in working problems man in a sweater and jeans. Good I was coming in an evening dress or a blouse with a sexy neckline luxurious!

This is surprising, but the fact that I have chosen out of all my wardrobe, it is absolutely in line with the place, the time, my companion, and most importantly - I myself. Which greatly influenced the course of the entire meeting because it allowed us to just be on the same wavelength. After all, we both came to that, what we are comfortable to walk, to sit, to chat. And it was so natural! In general, I recommend.

While there may be your favorite and most comfortable outfit - it's just a sexy blouse? Well, then go ahead!

But remember, war paint in the style of "take me now" and erotic outfit more suited to search for dubious adventures, rather than its second half.

You may ask: what about the advice that a woman in the first place should be attractive? Yes that's right. The question is: who you want to attract?

For your potential husband is likely to be attractive your femininity and inner beauty that modern men perfectly notice at first sight. And engaging in basic instinct to leave your relationship at this level and, most likely, forever.

2. Smile sincerely

We will not approach the smile of the Mona Lisa. Sometimes men fall into a strange stupor from such "women's tricks" with a claim to the notorious mystery. We will not work and a Hollywood smile in all 32 teeth. Psychologists have long explained why.

The only requirement for your smile: it must be sincere. You ask, how can all smile at a stranger, but more sincere? Just think that you are something sincere now! You are sincerely glad that they came to the meeting, and here he is waiting for you, and you are really happy to see him, did not you?

And another secret you open: there is nothing worse than a polite smile on the first date. Think about what she can talk to your chosen one? Personally, I see about this interpretation: "Well, that is very nice, of course, that you have come, but I'm so all polite, and that's why I'm so polite smile. I'm sure I already liked, because I was so polite. "

From personal experience

To successfully use this technique, sufficient to create within itself a special elation, which I like to call "quiet delight." Why silent? Why delight? On the one hand, you do not unmanageable fontaniruete emotions, on the other - does not exhaust your buddy disturbing thoughts about your inner troubles. That is looking for a middle ground.

If your enthusiasm is quiet, which means that it can be contained, but it is still present. It inevitably manifests itself from time to time and in the first breaks in your intonations, Into a smile. And your smile is really joyful and sincere. Because in that moment you release your inner sun is out.

A sincere smile disarms and it has to itself in a special way. It forms the space of trust, in which the other person gets.

Using only this technique, you will pass for one date most of the way to meet each other.

3. Keep it simple

Treat happening easily. Experience shows that a person is too fixated on the result, the chances of achieving it are drastically reduced. It is inexplicable, but it is a fact. Although, perhaps, the thing is too much tension. She did not adorn. And our task is to you - to present yourself so that people want to see you again. Or not even once!

It is also important not to try to show only their best side. This will allow you to see the different reactions of your potential partner and see whether he will be able in the future to deal with your little flaws.
What is surprising is that men respond positively to such openness. They also have something that I want to hide, there is a fear of damage first impression. Realizing that you do not allow yourself to be perfect, they themselves are a bit relaxed. And we'll remember that the main thing - to create an atmosphere of trust and comfort.

From personal experience

Basically I'm trying to be the same as in real life, to behave as usual, including permission to be imperfect. And it gave us the opportunity to immediately get to the next level of communication than the standard rassharkivanie with cross bows.

For example, late for 15 minutes, I just apologized and explained the reason for not wringing her hands. Then sincerely glad of mind and loyalty to the other party. And glad, so that he noticed that joy. And then I put myself plus, seeing as he straightened from internal sensations of his generosity. And then he told me that it happens to him, and finally relaxed. By the end of our conversation, we already knew that both are imperfect. And if you look closely, it is this knowledge and create a greater sense of intimacy.

Men like girls that can breathe easy, who does not need anything from yourself to build, to watch every word, gesture, in other words - to strain. Do not strain men on the first date. After all, if they were looking for, it means that someone is up to you and already very strained them!

4. Do not be afraid to ask

But ask about what is really important or interesting to you. Psychologists say that people love to talk about themselves. And it is a sin not to take advantage of! Seeing your genuine interest, man cheers up and becomes more calm.

Besides, as he says, you will be able to look him in the eyes for a long moment, investing in him any sense of what you want. Your eyes may be inviting, brooding, mysterious, or cheerful, intriguing, with a twinkle! But most importantly - it must be open and friendly. Personally, I've had enough, and the last option.

Also, it is worth on the first date ask the questionsWhich will pave the way for your future relations. Do not be afraid to talk with someone Acquaintance goals, ask him what he expects from communication.

Tell us about yourself. And here do not talk about what expect from the person or the relationship as a whole, "You should be (Hereinafter referred to a list of 48 items)And then I will marry you! "Talk about what you are attracted to the prospect of further communication with him. If it is difficult to tell about it to a potential partner, tell us about yourself. Suppose that in your head formed a clear picture. By the way, it will help you conduct a dialogue on track.

From personal experience

Openness and mutual interest allowed us to talk with enthusiasm throughout the meeting. Labored without pause, awkward silence, without the need to intensely think, would be more to ask about anything.

For difficult cases, there is one little secret, which I call the "loop-kryuchochek". Suppose you asked a question and received a detailed response. And notice that your companion frantically searches the recesses of his own brain, what would now ask you. Rescue him! Start talking about himself, answering the same question that he asked. He will have time to admire the silence you (personally I always say smiling). And it will be time to think of what to say next.

We really love it when us, our lives, our thoughts of others. Take your potential partner that joy!

Especially if you see that your questions do not plunge it into confusion and do not cause desire to hide somewhere. And at the same time you can find out for yourself all that you think is important.

5. Believe in yourself

This rule should be for you an axiom. Self-love, self-esteem and belief in their own abilities - are the main components of your future success. And not just on the first date. These qualities form the inner core of your sustainable for human life. And they are the basis of your charisma and appeal. If you are a happy owner of this magnificent combination, feel free to fix the date. Appointment will be successful!

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And in conclusion, I would say, read the article, explore trends, ask advice, seek information. But first of all listen to yourself! Your heart, your intuition will never let you down.

Be simple, genuine, sincere, ask, smile, believe in yourself!