How to reflect anger
Relations / / December 19, 2019
The feeling of anger is familiar to all of us. We are confronted with it almost daily. At work, in transport, at home. It is believed that the anger - a normal reaction to external stimuli. In this case, it is generally accepted that this normal response can and must be fought.
But often we are not the perpetrators and the victims. No one asks if we are ready to perform a lightning rod. Let off steam quickly return to normal. We also remain permanently hurt and a bad mood. How to deal with it? To find the answer, we turn to the theory.
What is anger
Psychologists consider anger a normal emotion.
Anger - a reaction to resentment, hurt feelings and mental suffering. A man is angry and yelling, trying to protect themselves.
According to other experts, not just anger emotionBut a form of passion. This process is characterized by emotional intensity and short duration. A few minutes is changing dramatically, not only mental, but also physiological condition of the person: reduced muscle blood rush, difficulty breathing.
In anger, the body works hard. A throwing negative energy gradually calms down. That's why we feel exhausted after a major quarrel, shouting and smashing crockery.
In this case, scientists believe that, like the instinct of self-preservation, the feeling of anger is common to all Homo sapiens and inherited. After all, there are bursts of aggression, even in children.
The shape and depth of its expression depend on the characteristics of socialization. If the family decided to speak in a raised voice and watch for dinner "Saw", a child more likely to be impulsive personality, ignited by any spark.
Anger is generated and devotion to their own views on what is right, and that - no. Thus, a meticulous man furious carelessness, introvert - talkativeness. It is irritating to everything that does not fit into the system of values, encroaching on it.
What conclusion can be drawn, generalizing these provisions?
Anger experienced by all, regardless of gender, age and race. A man in a rage often does not control his words and deeds.
How to protect yourself
Anger is destructive. It destroys us from within. We are prone to aggression is often a bad heart, hypertension, migraine, skin problems and gastrointestinal tract.
More dangerous than the so-called incoming anger - negative energy directed at us. What do you feel when you break a colleague, spouse (s), neighbor? Resentment, indignation, fear - common reaction. But often one flash of anger generates another response. It's hard to stay calm when they yell at you.
Not to withdraw into the circle of negative reactions, it is necessary to equally confront not only their own outbursts of anger, but also those that come from other people.
How to resist someone else's anger
1. breathe
Change your breath - the main recommendation self-control. Once in sight of an angry man, and feeling that you passed him excited, start to breathe slowly and deeply.
Try to do all 6-10 breaths per minute. Necessarily through the nose. Deliberate delays allow lead pulse and blood pressure to normal, calm.
2. distracted
Since childhood we have been taught not to listen to the interlocutor impolite. Nobody has added that this rule does not apply to angry people.
If you start to delve into the message of the angry person is a danger to get involved in a fruitless debate. Not to listen, remember some nursery rhyme or poem. "Our Tanya crying out loud ..." - these words known to all, but not so easy to play them in the head in an emergency. And this is good.
Remembering familiar since childhood good tunes, you can not help distract from the opponent angry speeches and a deaf ear to his taunts.
3. ironically
Bulging eyes, pull is enough movement, saliva splatters in different directions. A man in a fit of rage looks pretty comical. If you manage to escape from his words, you will notice it. And if you imagine him in budenovka and with his sword unsheathed - it will frankly funny picture.
But do not mock the man, which is located in the extreme emotional arousal. It is better to remember that an angry fist does not strike the smiling face. Smile kindly. And, perhaps, rage replaced grace.
4. dismiss
If possible, do not fall under the hot hand. Get out into the other room, take a walk, practice some business. Allow the person to let off steam.
But if you really exclude himself no chance, do it in your head. Imagine that between you and yell at you a brick wall. Compose details: white or red brick, masonry whether smooth, whether neat seams? This will help build up a psychological defense.
5. Farewell
Perhaps this is the main recommendation. In anger, the man does not give aware of the fact that the works (remember: this is a form of passion). And when the rage had passed, he feels a sense of guilt. Sometimes it does not even know how to look at you.
Spoke first. Make it clear that does not keep evil. So it will be easier to disrupt sincerely repent and renew a constructive dialogue.
Follow these simple tips and remember the ancient Indian wisdom: who does not respond to anger with anger, saves both - herself and angry.
see also🧐
- 10 standard phrases that indicate a latent aggression
- How to pacify the anger and why it's important to do it
- Anger management: how to draw the fury to his advantage